(Re)Training as an Adult Eventing Rider

UC Davis article on suspensory ligament injuries

2012-01-28T17:54:00.001-08:00

http://www.vetmed.ucdavis.edu/ceh/docs/special/Pubs-SuspBrochure-bkm-sec.pdf

Willig's MRI results

2012-01-25T17:46:00.000-08:00

He has an injured medial collateral sesamoidian ligament (old name: suspensory ligament of navicular bone). He'll get 8 more weeks of stall rest (3 months total), and 3 shock wave treatments. In the future, he may need another MRI, and injections in his coffin joint and navicular bursa.
It's not clear to me whether he'll jump again.
The MRI images were super cool.
The indoor dog park in Portland was super cool.
The flat trailer tire on the interstate was not even remotely cool and almost completely overwhelmed me (and Willig) with the stress, making me realize that the ways he annoys me are basically reflections of my personality.
He's also going to get SmartPaks of Quiessence, SmartOmega3, and SmartFlex Rehab (which will change to SmartFlex III Resilience when he goes back to work).

This is what a flat tire on the interstate looks like

2012-01-25T17:44:00.000-08:00

And Les Schwab are my new heros. They have a mobile tire change van that has a lift that can lift a horse trailer with a horse in it and the fastest tire changing guy in the world who doesn't even complain that it's raining.

Snow at Forest Park

2012-01-16T16:57:00.001-08:00

Family visit at Thanksgiving

2012-01-12T19:30:00.000-08:00

The cure for Willig stall boredom

2012-01-05T18:24:00.000-08:00

Not that he seems particularly out of sorts, but a fellow boarder loaned me her Amazing Graze, and I heard Willig playing and playing with it in his stall. Since he doesn't like Jolly Balls or Pas-I-Fier, I didn't have high hopes, but this appears to be just his thing!
Today I had just two quick mini-lessons and a couple of great ground tips.
For braiding, the trick to avoiding those bulges is to press your thumb on the top of each of the three strands to make it tight and flat at the top. It's the first three or so "wraps" that count. Once I master that, it looks like there's a trick to avoiding the "pippi longstocking" standing-straight-up braid (that Willig's mane usually does) and also ... braid styles go in and out of fashion in dressage! So while Willig is laid up, I'll practice braiding too.
For leading, you walk next to their shoulder. With a whip, it's in the outside hand and can be used to urge them forward. I lead all lazy in front of them, and that's the spot you can get jumped on if something unexpected happens.
Then we worked on the canter. I've had trouble using my existing method (at the top of the "swing", squeeze my inner thighs and lift a bit with my hands) to the get the moment of suspension to last longer. So Mike worked with us on changing my method from 1st level to her level, which was to think Piaffe, and then walk, and then ask for canter, and then keep the piaffe feeling. As best I can describe, this is to sit up tall - like the Centered Riding string pulling out of the top of your head - and that makes your core (belly and back) strong which helps hold that moment up. This worked to completely transform the canter, but I can't describe exactly why. Sitting up taller doesn't do it justice because after some work both directions, my thighs were just screaming.

Christmas shots

2011-12-26T19:05:00.000-08:00

Frisky George Lesson

2011-12-25T12:21:00.000-08:00

On Thursday (I'm four days late, so I've lost most of the details) I had a lesson on frisky George. (He was still frisky Friday and then super frisky Saturday, and even Prince was frisky on Saturday.) Because George shares a lot of personality characteristics with Willig, this was a great learning lesson. We did a lot of "attention" work on a 20 meter circle to help him focus on working and not looking for something to act up about for about 15 minutes or so while I rode the frisky out of him. (Saturday I couldn't do that, but it worked on Friday and is what I've been doing with Willig instead of lunging.)
The eureka moment in this lesson was trot to canter transitions that were perfectly "smooth". No speed up, no slow down. To obtain it, I lost the "jump" up into canter with the shoulders, but it was really, really cool to be trotting and then one step later just as smooth as silk be cantering.
I also got a better feel on what my body is doing when I "suck up" the trot and canter (slows down the cadence and adds the "jump" and moment of suspension in the gaits). It's lower back and inner thigh and a bit of abs and outer thigh. But this was the first time I could kind of identify what my body was doing when I asked him to "suck up".
We also worked on teaching him piaffe and passage, Mike running alongside.
We continued to work on "powering up" the trot by collecting him (my version of collection) for a few strides, then lengthening for a few strides, then collecting, etc.
Although it's in inches rather than feet, I feel like we're still making a lot of progress. The vet visit to check on Willig is Thursday, so I have my fingers crossed he'll get back to work. I actually miss riding him.

Christmas George!

2011-12-17T17:40:00.000-08:00

Prince jumping

2011-12-17T17:35:00.001-08:00

Baby Piaffe and Passage

2011-12-08T18:12:00.001-08:00

I had a dressage lesson on George today (still trying to get Willig sound in the slowest, most noncommittal approach ever), and a mini lesson on Falada.
For my before shot, I'm a dried up husk of dessicated sponge. For my after shot, I'm so full of liquid (information) that I'm dripping. And that was like, maybe absorbing 20% (at best) of what Mike was telling me.
Let's start with the things I still need to fix:
- My gripping legs - they're like cling-ons that never let go. Like how horses can sleep standing up, I have to think "relax" to make my legs ungrip. Invariably, if I check in with them (regardless of what is going on) they're gripping.
- Tone my middle. I'm doing more and more with my seat and it's connected parts, and I can't be flopping around loosey goosey.
- Watch my right side. Something funky is going on again (or it's just that this stuff is new and it's dominant) but I had a hard time with it overworking everything today. I also had, perhaps related, a hard time getting all three horses to canter. I think my hips are tight and I can't swing my leg far enough back, but I'm not sure what to do to work at home on that "leg back from the hip joint" feel.
So to start out with a bang, here's baby piaffe and passage:
Piaffe is stepping up and down in place, passage is lifting up and down. Piaffe comes out of the back legs while passage is elevating the front legs. I always thought they were two sides of the coin (I guess they are) but I hadn't appreciated these distinctions.
To teach a horse piaffe, you lean forward ever so slightly, slightly lift your hands, and put both legs back and do a whispery-fluttery aid. The person on the ground uses the stick to tap their hind legs, and when the horse starts the movement, it feels like he's crouching down. You just do a few steps then stop and reward. You do it out of walk, not halt.
For passage, you lean back, but then lift your hands and put both legs back with the fluttery aid, and also - I don't know how to describe this - suck up with your seat. The person on the ground uses the stick on the horse's front legs. This one feels like they're stepping over trot poles.
So this was really, really cool.
Then we took that feeling, and worked on the trot (slower) and when I thought piaffe, George would get light in my hands also. And if we did it really, really well and all the stars aligned, I could feel the moment of lift that we added.
Then later we took the feeling from passage, and used it with OPEN HIPS to extend the trot. This was the same thing I did with Falada after Mike rode her a few (?) rides ago, where she felt like she sat back, lifted her front end up in the air, and then shot forward like a rocket. We got a baby feeling of this with George.
We also worked on canter, taking the piaffe, and walking, doing a few half steps (thinking piaffe), walking, repeat a few times, and then cantering a few strides on a 10 meter circle, and then thinking 1-2-3 [trot/walk/halt]. I had been trying to ride Falada with halts from behind earlier, and this exercise also really helped with that.
Mike's goal is that the exercises we did today are how I will exercise George, Falada, and to a slightly lesser degree Prince, from now on. These exhausted my legs, made me pour sweat, and were exhilirating. The hard part is I don't even know how to describe what happened, and without being able to describe it, I feel like I can't repeat it. It's like it's squirming always just out of my grasp - every once in a while I get it with the tips of my fingers, and then it slithers away again. I definitely feel it when it's right, but I don't quite know what I'm doing with my body to make it right.
But I am definitely going to keep working on this, because I think the world is going to open up when I finally catch on. And my being nice to myself is that in the two years (ish) I've been riding with Mike and Shannon, I have made SO much progress as a rider. Yes, I regret I didn't have the opportunity to ride with this level of instruction from the very beginning (I might actually be good by now), but I'm grateful to at least have it now, and not go my whole life without learning this.

Jump lesson on George

2011-12-05T20:21:00.000-08:00

I was out of town for a week, and when I came back, Willig was off. I putzed around with him for a week, hoping it was arthritis, and then gave him bute for a week, so I rode George for my jump lesson.
George is a pretty green jumper, at least compared to Willig (I never thought I'd say that). But he still had to be a trooper because I just wasn't on my A (or B, or C) game. We had a lucky break of nice weather - no rain and not too cold with decent footing outside (not too mushy and wet).
We worked on a circle at first, then a circle over some ground poles, then finally a low combination (three trot poles to a cross rail, then eventually a 1 stride to a vertical, and then ending with a third vertical 2 strides from the middle).
I couldn't get my hands to stop screwing around with a mind of their own. Even my left leg couldn't outcompete my left hand.
This was so depressing and frustrating that I really don't even have anything to say about it.
The lesson I had a month-ish ago with Shannon where I had a eureka moment and rode without hands? That's what I need to be doing all the time, practicing all the time, until doing everything off of my seat feels natural. I need to brake by leaning back and using my back, not my hands. I need to steer off of my legs and seat, not my hands. I can't get the connection and power because I wiggle my hands around and let it all "out". So we worked with bridged reins and even then, my hands flapped and struggled to get free, and even on nice Mr. George, who knows how to ride off of seat and legs, I felt wild and out of control without my spazzy hands.
Afterwards, Willig got a light workout, and then handsome, sweet little Prince did a little teeny six jump trot course.

Letting go and Abdicating control

2011-11-10T20:24:00.000-08:00

I had two lessons today - a dressage lesson on Falada, the Grand Prix mare, and then a jumping lesson on Willig, the hootchie scootchie gelding we know all too well. Both were exhausting.
Dressage first.
Falada is the big, lazy southern belle sipping on a mint julep on a porch swing in the deep south. I thought I had gotten the hang of riding her, but it was actually just that she had fooled me into thinking I was riding, when really I was just lazily swinging.
Mike got on and showed me, talked me through everything he was doing, and let me feel (holding onto his fist) the amount of pressure he was using on the reins (not much, it turns out).
His first point was that I ride them fast, long, and strung out - and for a Grand Prix mare like Falada, she doesn't need to ride anything like that (Prince is just growing out of it, while baby Contempo is fine to be ridden like that). So he showed me the steps and how he gets her connected and on the bit, and then how he gets the impulsion and power coming from behind.
We also did a bit of piaffe and passage with the whip and bamboo pole, but all I learned is that this is yet another thing I'm not naturally coordinated at.
It was amazing to watch, and all made sense while he said it, but I couldn't repeat it later on the rest of the horses I rode. However, I did get to ride Falada right after, and we did some canter/walk transitions and this helluva huge extended trot that was just POWER exemplified. Really cool. Her butt sat down and her front legs lifted up and she just ROCKETED from the hind legs, but it was smooth as silk to sit on.
So it is kind of a wiggly leg (electrified leg - on and then OFF), then the toothpaste hands (also wiggly). When the horse gives, LET GO to reward them, then ask again. Some efforts are C, some are A+, but you have to reward so they understand what you're asking for.
This is the hard part - I can't let go. With my hands or with my leg. I just clench on tighter and tighter - like a barnacle stuck up there on their back.
So it was amazing to feel what it felt like when it was right, and for Mike to give me the step-by-step description, but I feel like this is my next big hurdle and I am really, really slowly catching on - even calling it "catching on" is being generous to myself.

Then Mike gave me a few comments on Willig's Donida dressage scores:
- Judge has no idea what happened at beginning of season
- Until I can ride test 2-1, I really shouldn't be showing test 1-3 (that's my words) - you should be riding at home a level above what you're showing
- a 60% is average. A 65-70% means you should be the next level up.
- a six has a big wide margin, an 8 is pretty much perfect and there's not a lot of 8-/ 8+ room
- I probably rode Willig bent the wrong way on the leg yield ("counterbent" would have been a more helpful comment than "ridden wrong")
- And I probably rode Willig the way I did pre-Falada lesson on the lengthened trot which is why she called it "strung out" (or whatever)

I've also been studying the 2-1 movements, and there's a lot I need to look up - like what is a simple lead change, and I'm still struggling with the difference between shoulder-in, haunches-in (travers), and renvers. And what's the difference between a lengthened trot and an extended trot?

Jump lesson:
I rode Willig last weekend over a course outside (well, we built up to it) but trot only because of the whole freight train/gimpy shoulder action at the canter. He did a good job, and I attributed it to my incredible skills "letting go" like both Mike and Shannon told me.
Mike had us do a similar warm up (should look like dressage) and then do a cross rail. His approach to Willig speeding up once he locked onto the fence was to (from the trot) ask him to halt, and then trot again, along the fence line, then halt on the far end, turn around, and do the fence again.
At canter, it was to turn off, at the latest, two strides out (one stride out is too late).
So we worked a few different fences at trot and canter - Willig was all ho-hum, of course - but doing just a teeny bit of the rushing before and after the fence. So Mike had us work on making the canter as short as possible. And if Willig sped up, turn off or halt. And if he rushed afterwards, use a pulley rein.
Now, we've used pulley reins before, but I had a really hard time with it today. One was my left shoulder was killing me (Falada likes to lean on it, and I'm prone to leaning back instead of tug and release) and it seemed like every time I needed it, it was my lame left arm. The other was I'm just mad, and I just pull and pull and pull and pull instead of pull and release. The third is that I can't feel the difference. Mike says he's listening and stopping the charging, but it doesn't feel any different to me until many, many, many strides later (and by then, I've just been ripping on his face unnecessarily). And fourth, I don't trust Willig. I don't like "release" because of how he used to bolt (and then once bolting, buck) and so I cling and cling to him.
And clinging, oddly, abdicates control. When I tug and release, I have better control than when I hang on him.
Mike thought Willig seemed happy and like he was enjoying himself, but that he was also clearly the one in charge and that no wonder I have trouble on the show jumping course. He also said work on this stuff on baby poles - a fight like that over a 3' fence is going to end in a crash.
So my homework was to set out about 12 poles around the arena and control what happens to them, over them, after them. And to use the pulley (sometimes I might need it four times) but over time, as he switches back to acknowledging me as the boss, I'll need it less and less and then only one time, if at all.

((shaking fist at heavens))

2011-10-29T21:14:00.000-07:00

We went to the Donida schooling show today. Disappointingly, despite how much work we've put into everything this year, our scores stayed pretty consistent with the beginning of the year - a 60.27 for 1-2 and a 59.35 for 1-3.
Here's what's infuriating: I have no idea how to improve them. I am riding and riding and riding and felt like I had finally pulled it all together, and instead, we've got the same old crap scores we always get.
For test 1-2, they were running about 45 minutes ahead of schedule, so I only warmed up for about 5 minutes. But I remembered Mike's comment when my time changed all crazy at Caber - that it's me who needs the time to warm up mentally, not Willig physically - and we actually did (slightly) better on that test.
The interesting ("") part about that was that Willig was very looky-loo at all the decorations - little pumpkins and leaves on the letters and a nice looking judge's stand - and so we've got a couple "braced" or "counterbent" comments when we're going past the judge at C. Indeed he was.
They let us have a nice long warm up so I got plenty of chances to find out just how hard he was going to brace (and thought of my lesson with Mike just this week where he spent the ENTIRE HOUR bracing in the same spot every freaking time).
Then they had a break, and they let riders come in and school. It was just me and another chestnut who didn't appear to care for the decor, and, not surprsingly, Willig didn't really get used to it. Just like in my lesson, maybe after 100x past it, we could go past it with just an ear craned at it, but if I rode down to the other end and back past it - yup, terrifying again.
So then after 1-3 - which by the way, for both - I felt like we did a great job. Given how much my shoulder has been hurting the last three weeks and the antics he's been pulling and all the opportunities (each letter with each new pumpkin) he had to act up, I thought he was a rock star. I was sitting well, I thought we had good engagement and connection, and I thought he had some really nice movements. A couple of them even made me smile.
Which is why I'm so frustrated with our scores - I'm obviously not feeling the right thing if I thought it was stellar and it was really 60%. So what am I feeling wrong?
After 1-3, the judge called me over and said that I'm letting him rush the trot lengthening, and so he's falling on his forehand, and then just falling on it faster. So do I not even know what that feels like? She also said in a lot of my comments that my leg yields were wrong. And I thought they were pretty spectacular - some of them I could even see in their mirrors.
So - sigh. More to work on with Mike. I could work with him pretty much every day and probably still not know what I don't know.
It was a pretty day though - pretty perfect horse show weather, and he stood in the trailer and ate hay like a champ. Loaded great both times too. And Atom was a little darling in the truck. So that part was good.

Codependent riding

2011-10-27T20:38:00.000-07:00

The picture is only because I haven't posted one in a long time.
Today I had a good ride on three of Mike's horses:
Falada - Grand Prix
Tempi - Baby
George - 4th Level
Then I had a lesson on Willig, where we reverted to our work two years ago ... going past the scary corner. Seriously.
Mike gave me some more tools in my tool box to work with Willig (other than the unsuccessful losing-my-temper approach). Interestingly, although done in their own styles, his and Shannon's advice has been pretty much paralleling, and I'll call it "stop being a codependent rider."
Here's what seems to be happening: Willig radar beams his ears onto the scary corner and tenses up. I tense up my hands. He feels my tension and tenses his body. I feel the tension in his body and tense my body. He feels the tension and is like "oh shit! I better run!" As he takes the first step towards run, I go from 0-60 and start ripping on his face - that just scares him more. You get my point.
So both Mike and Shannon in my lessons this week had me do something that is almost physically impossible for me to do ... let go.
Shannon had me do it in the riding-with-only-my-seat method.
Mike had me ask Willig to connect (and then LET GO - I have a freakishly hard time letting go) and then once he gives, let go until his head pops up or zings around again. It's "ok" (not desirable, but as a training tool, ok to do for the short term) for me to use hard hands - what I'd call sawing on his face - if he ignores me and tries to crane his head around like a giraffe. But as soon as he gives to me, I have to stop and have light hands, even if I think he's going to fling it around a nanosecond later.
So we did that for a while around the corner. (We also did it at the end of the lesson, where Willig immediately - despite almost an hour of working around that corner, after being away from it for 2 minutes, flung around again like an epileptic.)
Then Mike set up a tiny little jump to see if Willig would rush it like he has been. No. He didn't. He jumped it from stupid take-off points, but was all ho-hum (going around the corner AFTER jumping it? That required counterbending and shoulders leading all crazy tilting-boat to the inside. But the fence itself - yawn.)
Mike did notice that I have a death grip on the reins, so even when Willig jumps, and most likely when he's heading towards a normal sized fence, I'm clenching tighter and tighter - which Mike points out gives him something to lean forward onto and REALLY rush. So again, his advice was to ride to the fence, and then LET GO and just let him do his job.
Then he turned the fence into a ground pole and we worked on shortening the stride and lengthening the stride to it and in between, to work on those take off points that Willig is missing. (When I started on the show jumpers, we told them the spot, and after about a year, I could always see it. Eventing, I try not to tell Willig the spot so that he'll find it - or correct it - himself, because I'll need that more on xc in case of trouble than I want a pretty sj round.)
Then we did just a bit of lateral work and ended with some canter work. Mike has noticed I have a fast seat - I'm not surprised given the rest of my personality - and so he had us work on going from an even trot to an even (excruciatingly slow) canter then when I ask for it (1-2-3) back down to even trot (or walk or halt).
Then, as I said, we rode back down to the far end where Willig was scared, and then when I walked him outside to cool him off, birds flew, which made him spook again. (By the by, most of my lesson was with the mower going just outside the door, which made for a great opportunity to work with Mike while Willig had something he was scared of.)
It was a useful lesson, but frustrating. It doesn't feel like we're making a lot of progress on the riding-neurotic-willig front, and I don't understand why I can ride Mike's horses (he pointed out his horses SHOULD be better than mine, since he's a professional and makes a living doing it, so maybe I should rethink my standards), but not Willig, although he and Shannon both pointed out the past history probably has a lot to do with it.
It's just that - Mike's horses, as varied as they are, are fun. Willig just feels like work.

Willig the freight train

2011-10-22T21:01:00.000-07:00

We had a painful (emotionally and sweat-inducing) lesson today.
I have been losing my temper with Willig's antics. We started by me telling Shannon about how he won't quit swinging his head in the canter. (Sometimes I can see his teeth.) This led to us cantering around with my hands clamped on the breastplate (to see if it was my hands (giveaway: yes) or his head), but when we got to the scary end, he'd toss his head up and try to run. I'd react by see-sawing on his mouth, which would make him swing his head crazier. Shannon very calmly asked why I was ripping on his face (true answer: it makes me feel better) then pointed out it wasn't achieving any sort of goal - plus my goals were disorganized and inconsistent anyway, so how was he going to obey them?
Then we worked on the riding without hands, but I just got madder and madder because every time we'd head toward or away from the scary end (hint: in a rectangle, that makes everywhere but the short far end), he'd speed up. And sometimes skitter sideways. And I couldn't halt him. And so Shannon had us do a decent canter around, but he kept speeding up as we went past that end, so she had us keep cantering, until I completely melted down, tried to stop him, and couldn't, and jerked on his face all the way down the arena (this is longer than the long side in a full size dressage arena) trying to get him to stop before I just started crying.
So Shannon went and got a gag bit.
This helped a lot, although every time I'd apply any pressure, he'd toss his head up. While he still mostly blew me off - and this was the root of the problem - I had at least a tool at my disposal. Like the (now) trusty spurs.
And so this is it in a nutshell: bucking doesn't work anymore. spinning doesn't work anymore. his half ass rears don't work. But being a freight train does work.
Now I don't understand HOW freight train barreling around the arena is LESS work than just doing whatever I'm asking him to do (today: stop), but that's the next tool in Willig's toolkit, and like an idiot bipedal, I've chosen to wrestle with him - I mean, his freaking head probably weighs more than me - and I lose every time.
WHY does he do it? Because he's kind of a dick. Just like Shannon said the first time she rode him and John when I picked him up from training, and just like I'm learning from riding Mike's horses (and why my temper is getting so frayed and short with him).
We ended up with a fine series of fences, although they were baby fences, but since I started the lesson unable to halt, I guess that's progress.
We're going to try some stronger bits as another tool - not going backwards, but having something available to help correct his and my mistakes in training - and then I guess I'll see what he pulls out of his hat next.
We were both soaking wet with sweat by 1/3 of the way into the lesson. And I was crying and furious and frustrated with him, so I'm glad it was in front of Shannon during a lesson.
She said I have got to keep my cool. Pretend like I'm in a new arena and have no expectations about that end. Don't circle him anymore, but make him stay on the rail. If he's bad, he has to back or leg yield or shoulder-in. Try the harder bits and don't get in a wrestling match with his face. And be clear in what I want. If I want him to halt, make him halt.
Interestingly, this seems to be an extension of my Mike lesson, where Mike pointed out he was pretty much ignoring me. I think that's what's happened as this week has gone on - what makes me livid is when he just totally brushes off my aids and does whatever he feels like. I haven't known what to do when he does that.

Chicken and egg

2011-10-16T20:17:00.000-07:00

Two out of the last three days Willig threw temper tantrums. The first was Friday, when I asked him to do the same thing we did during our lesson Thursday (picking up the canter from the walk on a small circle). Instead, he feigned confusion and reared. When I'd whip him, he'd buck. When I'd kick him to stop him from bucking, he'd dart forward or sideways. When I'd jerk on his face to stop him from darting, he'd rear. Etc.
Saturday, he was an angel and was doing what felt like canter pirouettes.
Today, I tried to jump him outside in the good weather. He did fine when we trotted the course, but when I tried to canter it, we got into another huge fight (rearing, bucking, darting). This one made my left rotator cuff start hurting again, so I had to half-concede, after battling him into going over a few fences at least half-ass correctly.
Mike suggested during our lesson Thursday that we might have a couple of big disagreements coming up, and today two people were talking about Mike's "discussions" with their respective horses and how the horses respected him from that point forward.
Which brings me to the subject - is the problem me or Willig or both (a baby chicken in an egg?). In support of the problem being Willig, Exhibit A is the fact that I can ride all of Mike's horses (well, all that I've gotten on), no problemo. In support of the problem being me, Exhibit B is that well, those are Mike's horses. If Mike quit riding them and only I rode them, maybe eventually they'd degrade and act like Willig. In support of the problem being mutual, Exhibit C is the most likely - probably if Mike rode Willig all the time, he'd be as good as Mike's horses, and therefore the more I can ride with/for Mike, the more I'll learn and the more I'll increase the chances that one day, I'll be able to teach Willig (or future horse) the things that Mike "naturally" does.
A couple follow ups on my lesson:
- Supple and stretch over topline; compress underneath the neck. This should be my goal for all neck frames.
- As much as I might grumble, I'm glad when Willig's bad in a lesson because I don't have enough knowledge or innate talent to figure it out on my own in between lessons. So while I hate naughty Willig over fences, or bucking/rearing Willig - I'd WAY rather have Shannon or Mike be there that hour, yelling what to do next, so that when I'm alone, I can at least try their tips.
- I think that the lack of "feeling" (I prefer riding by formula) is really a fear of failure. I've noticed that I'm not taking as much advantage as I can of Mike's horses. Pablo in particular on Saturday I realized that I don't have to steer with my hands AT ALL. I can just use my hips. While I'm riding very well trained horses (but with different personalities and confirmations) I should be trying everything and soaking up what works and what doesn't work like a sponge. But I'm afraid to try things (and in fact, will do the same thing, not working, until someone tells me not to) because I'm afraid of looking like a doofus.

3 rides & a lesson

2011-10-13T19:53:00.000-07:00

Today was full and fabulous. I rode three of Mike's horses (Pablo, Prince, and Falada) and then had a lesson on Willig. I feel like the cup that overfloweth. There was WAY too much information in those three rides and lesson for me to be able to retain it all.
Mike gave me a mini-lesson on Pablo. First - a "duh" moment. I've been trying to get Pablo to carry his head lower, and the way I've been asking is to suck up and suck up the reins. Because Pablo is a gentleman, he sucks up and sucks up his neck, and neither of us could see the forest for the trees (actually, Pablo was probably just like "What the hell is she doing up there?" and then chummily going along with it). Here is a life lesson: if what you're doing isn't working, don't keep doing it. Try something else. This took about a nanosecond from Mike before he said "let the reins out" - Pablo stretched down and out into them (gratefully, I'm pretty sure) and we solved the problem why I couldn't get his head and neck frame lower. Second - then we got to the harder (new) stuff (for me). Pablo can canter really, really, really slowly. And I need to ask him to, because that's how he's supposed to canter. I fling around like something shot out of a rocket, and what he needs is the moment of "lift" (the suspension) in the 1-2-3-air-1-2-3-air. Because he's Grand Prix, he can hold that "air" moment so long that you can feel it. If you're going slow enough, which I never am on my own. Oddly, this was hard for me to do. Mike also noticed that Pablo, who is a very straight horse, was riding travers the whole time, and so I think it's coming out of my left hip. I had to contort myself (at least, my feeling) to get him straight. I've got to get that figured out. We also worked on extended trot. Mike says to balance it out - ride passage, and then extend it, but you keep the "up" from passage and then let it flow forward to the extension - not flopping onto the forehand but the elevation and engagement from behind.
Next I rode Prince, who is my favorite, and a total delight to ride. He wasn't quite as much a sweetie as he has been the other rides - he didn't really want to do transitions smoothly. We ended our ride outside, where I taught him to walk over the tarp. Since he's a sweetie, this was really just me being patient while he looked at it, hesitated, looked at it, took a tentative step forward, looked at it ... etc. I can tell I adore him because he finally put both front feet over it, got scared, and jumped backwards instead of the rest of the way over it, which I thought was funny (instead of infuriating, if Willig had done it). We got to where he didn't hesitate for a second to walk over it and called it quits.
Then I rode Falada, another Grand Prix horse, who has an entirely different feel than Pablo. It doesn't feel like you're working to ride her (at least, the way I was riding), but then your muscles are oddly tired at the end. She feels like you're just sitting in a nice swing on the front porch of a southern mansion. We worked outside in a nice break of sun. Shannon rode by and said we were long and low, and Mike said he'll try to time it so I can ride her and he can give me a lesson because she's naturally long and low (and I am too) so I'll know the proper feel.
Then came my lesson on Willig.
He should be the easiest, since I'm the most used to him, but he rides like a pogo stick after them. A pogo stick with one of those bobbling heads.
He's been a bit of a kook about the far end (now that it's dark out of it at night), and today another boarder parked there to move fences, and so he spent most of the warm up telling me he had been justified all those nights he's been scared of it in the dark.
So what we ended up spending a lot of time on during the lesson was how Willig doesn't actually respond to me, and in fact, kind of blows me off. And worse than that (to me), when he gets punished for it, he gives me the horse finger (a little buck, a head shake) instead of a shamed "I'll do better next time" Eeyore approach.
I was having a terrible time with his bobbling head (which is just excruciating after riding three of Mike's horses) so we went way, way back to basics, at the halt, with Mike holding the reins, we'd get his head in the proper place, and then I'd release when he gave, and then the second it flung again (about a nanosecond later), we'd do it again. Then we did that at the walk. Then we tried to do it at the trot. The idea is that he learns that it's what I want. Then he holds it for a nanosecond on his own. Then he holds it for a second - then two - then three - etc. until it's a 1/4 circle, a 1/2 circle, a circle - half the arena - then trotting - then transitioning up - then down - to infinity. Maybe by the time one of us is 40, we'll be able to go around the arena like Mike's four year old does. I give a little uberstrechen (sp?) on each side once he's got it to teach him that's what I want and he's supposed to hold it on his own.
Honestly, this was most of the lesson. And I was making grunting noises of frustration through a lot of it.
Then we did picking up the correct lead. If I want the right lead, my left shoulder blade "looks" to the inside, and I ask for leg yield to the right. And the problem was yes, my position, but also that I'd ask (correctly) and Willig would just ignore it. So there was a lot of kicking and whipping - or at least, Mike telling me to kick and whip and by then it was late.
Then we did our teeny tiny (8 m?) circles at three strides of up-up-up canter. This is to help him a) build the muscle for the longer suspension like Pablo can do, b) know that what I want is the slowed down version, and c) get his attention on me. It also helps me remember that transitions are supposed to be seamless - 1-2-1-2 (trotting), then 1-2-1-2 (cantering), then 1-2-1-2 (trotting) - no sprawling in between the up and down aids. Maybe 1 in 10 he did gorgeously. The rest were like a blooper reel.
Then we did some half-elevated trot poles, and then the trot poles picking up the canter as we came over the last pole. What was interesting here was that the cadence over the trot pole, I could sit (it also helps me to sit the bigger trot to think about "swinging" my hips towards my hands) which I think we tried about a year ago and it just flung me out of the saddle like a rag doll. But as soon as we were over the poles, I'd flop around. Mike thought Willig was diving down and pulling me.
Finally, we ended up with trying to work on the passage feeling from Pablo, but this ended up being a wrestling match about his head position (back to square one, where we started), and as sweat was pouring down my forehead, he finally gave for a teeny tiny second and we were able to quit. It took lap after lap after lap after lap. Mike's take is that while Willig is not the most generous of horses, he's teaching me a lot (at the very least, teaching me what to feel for the next horse I get), and he suspects that while I might grumble (and sweat, vigorously), I'd be bored on a horse that didn't have that spunk. And since the ones with both spunk and a charming personality are never for sale - or require winning the lottery to buy - this is worth learning.
I agree. Learning how to teach Willig (who Mike says has a nice canter and walk, but could improve his trot) how to do all these things will help me with my next horse - and every other horse I ride. It's just I'm impatient. Now that the door has opened and I've seen how much I'm missing out on, I want to be in THAT room - not learning how to go through the door - and I want to be there, like, yesterday. And yes, I've let Willig get away with a lot of nonsense for the last 4 (?) years, so why should he understand that as of last week, I didn't want to put up with it anymore? I need to unteach him the bad habits I taught him.
By the end of the day, I was exhausted and ecstatic. What a great day. I would give just about anything to be able to do this every day. And I am so, so lucky to be able to do it one day a week (and weekends!). This has been, quite possibly, my best life decision yet.

1st jump lesson in about 2 months

2011-10-09T10:24:00.000-07:00

Note 1: The jumps got "big" again with two months off. I was looking at 2'10", 2'11" like it was normal at the end there, and now 2'6" has become monstrous. I'm getting old ...
Note 2: Willig has been heavy on my deltoids lately (I am not sure what we're doing differently, but after about 10 minutes of it, my deltoids are screaming for mercy), and his first day of jumping, outside with the wind blowing up his tail, and that stupid poodle romping around in his barn, doing a three fence line heading towards the barn = no need to work on the deltoids at home with weights that evening. Lordy.
Note 3: My lower leg did NOT forget (like my eyeballs did with the height)! Shannon is worth her weight in gold for that alone. Willig had the end of one fence where he decided to be a pill and buck and skidder around sideways, and even though we'd been freight train barreling through, I was in balance above him over the last (highest) fence every time, so he couldn't unseat me or shake me out of balance and I could get right to the business of whipping him and making him work.
Note 4: Some of his antics lately have included these baby rears. Shannon said to always make him go forward (even forward in a circle) because he can't go up if he's moving forward.

What we did was some ground poles, and working on paying attention to me (not the wall) by leg yielding towards it and watching his ears and asking for the attention to refocus on me. At one point, he was so focused on the poodle that Shannon told me to circle to get his attention back to me, but he shifted right that second so we didn't have to. But good reminder - I need him focused on me, not other stuff, and not to keep going just because I want to do the fence next.
Then we did an easy line (really long distance between and trotting, two low fences), stopping at the end, turning around, and going back through it the other way. We did this a whole bunch of times, but he never really got lighter or more responsive. Ideally, when I'd sit up tall at the end, he'd slow down.
Then Shannon turned it into low verticals. Same thing, but cantering.
Then she put a third fence in the center, making it one direction, and made the end fence taller.
Then she put some stuff underneath the fences to make him look.
The good news is while he was looky (at everything but me - the fences, the poodle, her), he didn't do any snaky run-outs or anything like it.
He had the one little bucking jump after one line, but other than that, his only flaw was barreling like a jet, which is hardly the worst from him.
Plus, that third fence in the line, floating over it with my legs and balance just right every time? Heaven!

Hives are gone again

2011-10-09T10:23:00.000-07:00

Whew!
They've been gone a couple weeks, but I kept him on his supplements to make sure whatever it was that got into his system had a chance to get all the way out, and to watch for them to come back when I took him off the supplements.

2nd day of work and 2nd level new movement

2011-09-30T07:21:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I got to ride Pablo, Falada, and Prince. Two Grand Prix horses and a 5 year old who is a sweetheart. Mike gave me some suggestions while I was riding Pablo, but then he got busy with Teenie, and then we went on a trail ride with George and Falada.
During my lesson, by which point my abs were getting tired (yay in long run!), we worked on:
- Foot position. Yes, toes straight ahead (as if standing) is preferred to 45 degree angle - for dressage, because you need so much fine tuned leg movement.
- We did a 3 loop serpentine for the first time. Very cool, but I need to think about it - I have to lift the inside seat bone - unless it's the outside - why I need to think about it. And the geometry, which looks simple on paper, is not as intuitive to ride.
- Collection and being on the bit. Willig was having a day where he really didn't want to be on the bit, so there was a lot of heavy handed riding by me - it makes my arms tired.
- But then we figured out, after a canter lengthening where I basically threw the reins down, that maybe what I'm missing working on the "poof" by myself is that I throw away the connection. When I keep the "heavy" contact, Willig LIFTS, which is weird and also counterintuitive because the poof is so light and easy to ride.
- Don't put up with the laziness - if I want him to respond immediately to my aids, them make him respond every single transition every single ride.
I was kind of pooped by the end of the day, although it was pretty much what I'd do every day if I was a millionaire and didn't have to work, so it was a very happy, good exhaustion. It's also soooo cool to get to ride all those horses, and then about a million times cooler to have Mike there to give me little pointers. This is far and away the best use of my time I've made out of the last - 10 years? My life?
However, Willig is the LEAST fun to ride of that bunch. They're all different, they all look at the scary end to varying degrees, but I can't quite put my finger on what makes him more difficult. He's more ... wiggly.

Me, Mom & Willig

2011-09-29T19:52:00.000-07:00

Hive free!

2011-09-26T21:04:00.000-07:00

For the time being at least.
And we're back to jumping. Willig has been (knock on leather) quite the gentleman lately.

Prince & George

2011-09-22T18:54:00.001-07:00

Today I rode two horses, my first day helping Mike, Prince and George. (Two chestnuts - then Willig, who I swear was jealously watching me and hence, well behaved when I finally got on him.)
Prince is young (4?) and seems to have the personality of his mother. He was very mellow for a youngster. He acted like I expect warmbloods to act. A flick of the ears rather than a rapid sideways skittering.
George is a bit more frisky, but thanks to the few years now of working with Willig, it wasn't a big deal (!!). The only thing he did (that I forgot to ask Mike about) was when he was trying to do a racecar canter, and I'd ask him for a down transition, he'd do a collected canter instead. So I obviously don't know the distinction between those two aids, and should figure it out so I don't confuse him in the future.
Both of them, like Mardi, Charlie, and Pablo, were much more "rolly" and easy to ride. I was thinking it was because Willig is very narrow compared to them, but then, as I thought about their confirmations, I realized that couldn't be it (they all have very different confirmations, and Willig's is actually, while narrow, quite elegant).
And then I had an "ah-ha" moment. It's their balance. Their hindquarters are engaged while Willig still spends a lot of time heavy on the forehand. It's what makes them feel like a wave rolling from back to front (it comes under the hip bone, lifts it up, and gently lets it back down), makes them easier to sit the trot on, and makes them easier to ride in general.
I feel like I'm on the verge of "getting it", but I really, really want to know how to create that engagement myself. I will NEVER EVER go back once I've figured that out. (Although I have no idea how I've ridden so many horses - 100? - and never felt it until this barn.)
As an aside - the trampoline seat is really coming along. (That's what I think is the verge of getting it. Suddenly, I can do trampoline seat no problem.)

Breakthrough! I can ride with my seat & legs!

2011-09-18T20:50:00.000-07:00

I had a flat lesson with Shannon today - I wasn't sure Willig was going to be sound for jumping, but there is plenty to work on from the ground, and I didn't want to miss yet another lesson weekend.
This was, it turns out, a brilliant idea. (Go, Martha.)
After my normal ploddy around crap for warm-up (the take away: it really isn't necessary. Do a few laps of plodding (<10 minutes) and then get to work.), we did something really, really cool. Are you ready? Can you wait to hear this? Are you on the edge of your seat?
I was telling Shannon about how when I rode Pablo, I tried to steer from the inside hand to turn him, and it took me most of the lesson to start steering with the outside hand and leg, like she told me to do maybe a year ago?
And I'm worried that I'm somehow faking it on Willig, and don't know how to do this yet. First, she pointed out I rode Charlie fine, and second, she hasn't noticed anything egregious, but ok, we'd work on it.
And so I latched my hands onto the gel pad and ....
steered Willig with my legs and seat only!!!!
With other horses in the arena, I could make circles, move him in and out off the wall in the circle, go from walk to trot to canter and back down.
And I didn't need my hands for ANY of it.
It was amazing. I was grinning like a fool again.
We tried this, outside, maybe a year ago or so, and I couldn't even go a few steps without freaking out and letting go of the saddle pad and hanging onto the reins again. I kept telling her (that time) that there was NO WAY I could go around the arena without my hands. She'd tell me to try again, and I'd try to sneaky use my hand.
This was so amazing and cool and also just such an objective sign of progress.
And ... still not lame! Those first few days were maybe just him bouncing off the walls. I haven't felt a flicker since.
Although he's still got his hives - so far just neck and saddle area - not behind the saddle.
So the lesson was that I micro-manage with my hands, but if I can think about them being still, I am perfectly capable of riding with my seat and legs for pretty much everything I need.
And he was a gentleman. Lots and lots of horses and the rain and he's been kind of wild this week, but not during this lesson.

3 of my 4 friends riding at Peteton today

2011-09-17T19:40:00.000-07:00

Eeeeee - happy dance!

2011-09-16T19:21:00.001-07:00

Starting next week, one afternoon a week I'll be helping Mike with his horses. Since he is teaching a couple piaffe and passage, this is going to be SO educational. I am so excited!!!

Trampoline Seat = Easier Ride

2011-09-15T16:33:00.001-07:00

Today we worked our way closer to the elusive poof. Thanks to one of the Pony Club manuals, I realized that what I've been calling the "poof" is when Willig gets off his forehand and engages his hindlegs, which elevates the forehand and creates the "poof". Mike explained how Training and 1st level are working over the topline, so switching to the "poof" for 2nd and 3rd level is a big change for the way that the horse thinks about doing his job.
We started with working on the sitting trot with the "trampoline seat" and an internal metronome to switch from a regular trot to a working trot and back. I can ask for a bigger trot, but unless I think "1-2-1-2" to myself, we just speed up and flop onto the forehand. When I think "1-2" instead, he begins to lift up, and while the trot gets bigger (and yes, a little faster), it isn't as hard to sit as a racing on the forehand medium trot.
Then we worked on the canter, thinking the same thing - maintaining his connection into the canter (by slowing down the trot and then WAITING for him instead of flinging into the aid like a spaz (me)), and then lifting into trot, not plummeting down on the forehand. We also did a bit of using the outside leg to move him onto a 10 meter circle, and then maintain the canter (hard work for him) on the little circle.
As if that didn't fill my head with enough, then we did a few minutes of asking for connection - wiggling both rains erratically(right 3 shakes, left 7 shakes, right 4 shakes, both together, etc.) to get his attention and connection. Then I did the same walking, and then added leg shaking which was truly a feat of multi-tasking. And then, because Mike couldn't see the steam coming out of my ears with my poor brain trying so hard to juggle that much, he added picking up the trot. The goal was Willig, moving forward nicely, but maintaining his connection. The secondary goal was to begin to train my brain to focus on more things at once, so that when we eventually learn flying changes, and it is an inside leg, outside leg, hip, shoulder, hand aid - all at once - I'll have the multi-tasking ability to do it.
Then we went to lateral work, doing leg yields, and then leg yields that turned into shoulder-in. This helps to engage his hind leg, but also helps me with my aids (these were kind of ugly - we got the job done but it wasn't pretty) and not using my leg further back for leg yield or allowing him to bend too much in shoulder-in, but instead, really engage his outside hind leg.
Then we took the lateral work, added canter, and shifted my shoulders to the outside, which made Willig's hindquarters go to the inside, and then to the inside, which made them (sort of) go to the outside. He moved more naturally (most horses do, apparently) to the inside.
*Note - trampoline seat can be done from a slightly forward jumping seat (like a hunter seat), and doesn't need a leaning-back driving seat. The driving seat kind of drives Willig to dive down on his forehand, while, kind of contrary to my common sense at least, the slightly tilted forward softer seat still "lifts" him on the forehand.
Then we went back to canter, not running forward on the up transition, not plummeting down in the down transition, and making a 10 meter circle.
The take-aways were that there is indeed, another layer of the onion, and I've mastered (my thinking) the last layer, and am ready to tackle this layer. But just like sitting trot seemed overwhelming, and heels down seemed overwhelming, and leg yield seemed overwhelming, this new layer of the onion is a whole new world. Which, I have to say, is one of the coolest things about riding.
And then second is just how much easier and more delightful it is to ride when I keep Willig "bundled". And that I can "bundle" him but still do a trot lengthening or a medium (well, try to) trot. I don't have to let him fling out and splay around, and it is so, so, so much easier on my lower back!
And third is to keep pushing it. Because I can consistently leg yield him, now let's take it up a notch and leg yield with impulsion. And then leg yield with impulsion and with the shoulder-in. Keep it challenging for both of us.
It was a great ride with a lot to chew on. Mike said as I work on all these things, they'll gradually become part of the repetoire, and then we'll be able to add more.

Unicorns, rainbows, and starry-eyed bunnies

2011-09-03T17:21:00.000-07:00

This is a post that is about my wonderful, best-hour-of-the-year (maybe decade) ride on Pablo this week.
Here's what I actually learned, other than that I can be completely and utterly present and happy on a horse:
- Something's off with my left leg. I think it's my hip, but I should probably figure this out before I waste too much more time blaming Willig.
- I need to learn to turn from the outside rein/outside hand.
- I don't know how to 'squeeze the toothpaste'. I think this is collection that I don't know how to do.
- I throw my hands forward after an up-aid.

Aspen Farms is a delight to volunteer for!

2011-09-03T17:14:00.000-07:00

Although I got up at 5 am this morning, volunteering for Aspen Farms was so well run that I didn't grumble once.
First off - they feed you breakfast. Warm breakfast. French toast, bacon for you meat-eaters, yogurt, cereal, and coffee - when it's 48 degrees out this is AWESOME.
Then - they give you a shirt!
Then they gave me (at least) a super sweet location where I had almost no refusals but got to watch Training level horses have issues with the first water fence, and therefore - I learned SOOOOO much yet didn't have to write it down on the form!
Then I walked BN to scope it out for next year, which gave me some ideas (uh, we have to learn up-banks; and we need to work on oxers with some spread to them, and stick with the height (3') so the fences at the show seem puny).
Here's a few photos that looked brilliantly done on my iPhone screen, but not so much on the computer screen.
We also met a rider with a dachshund like Atom, and I asked her what she does with him when she rides. Answer: puts him in trailer (nothing else worked). So that seals it! Next year we'll camp and Atom will accompany me to shows.

Willig's hives are back this year

2011-09-01T18:33:00.000-07:00

He's got a smattering of them across his chest and neck, mostly. They're small but a few have the center depression, so he's starting on his blend of herbs today.
There was NO change in hay around this one.

Face-splitting grin

2011-09-01T18:21:00.001-07:00

Today I got to ride Pablo, Mike's Grand Prix horse, while Willig is in his second week of recovery. I was so excited and was asking around for tips, because I didn't want to embarrass myself and reveal that I actually have no idea what I'm doing. The consistent message was to relax; Pablo is so well trained that each tensing tells him to do something.
So of course this morning there was earth-shattering work news, and I was a nervous ball of tightly wound energy (ironically, what I noticed about Willig a few hours later on our trail ride), and I only got tighter knowing this was my ONE CHANCE to ride a horse like Pablo, and I was going to blow it by being the most tightly wound I can remember being.
Well, it turns out that a ride on Pablo undose the worst day of your professional life, and your breakup with your boyfriend, and also most of the unpleasantness of the last 5 - 10 - maybe even 20 years.
Hence, the face splitting grin.
It was incredible.
I could collect him by sitting smaller. I could bend him with the outside rein and hand. I could move from a collected trot to a medium trot by loosening my gut and opening my hands a bit. We did canter pirouettes. We did half passes. We did collected trot and piaffe and passage. We did medium trot. We did shoulder in and travers. We picked up the canter from the walk and collected the walk. We did flying changes!!!
And each movement - was like - divinity. I thought, and Pablo would do. Unless I was giving him weird-ass aids, like towards the end of the lesson when I got tense and started overthinking it and then couldn't get the right lead canter anymore. (Left lead? No problem. So this was also useful because Mike pointed out it was the opposite of the problem with Willig, and so it helps him pinpoint where in my body the aid is getting messed up.)
We would be doing something, and I would just be grinning and on 7th heaven, and Mike would have to say "Martha? Where are you going?" Because I was just ... riding, man. And enjoying every blissful second of it.
I could feel how to use my body to get the movement.
I could ride the movements without having to mess around and mess around.
I "got" how wiggly and twisty I am, because Pablo was like a big, giant mirror, reflecting how I push with my right leg so his haunches would swing enormous to the inside, and it was SO HARD to ride him straight, so my body is all jiggly and twisty.
It was a lot like being a kid in love with horses, and then finally, finally getting on one for the first time, and feeling like you've finally found the place you belong.
It's like the smell of the barn and the hay and horses chewing when you've had to be away for too long.
You just breathe and relax and love life and are present. I have never felt more relaxed and happy as an adult.
It was a wonderful, wonderful experience.

11 days

2011-08-30T19:45:00.000-07:00

I was getting all reflective about riding this morning on my drive in, because I'm getting really cranky without riding, and it's only been 11 days. When the vet said 3 days of stall rest and then 3 weeks off, I thought "well that's awesome, I'll go ahead and reactivate my gym membership and get at least 25 things done on my to do list with all that extra time" but instead I've mostly just been working.
And so I was thinking that without riding, my soul kind of shrivels up. Riding is the thing that nourishes me. It's more like water. I need it almost every day or else I start to fold in on myself and get sharp edges.
I was thinking about why - I spend so much time complaining and not being where I want to be, but the second that it's gone, I'm lost.
What's interesting about the conundrum is that it's the sport that - maybe - gives you the least control. If you want to run faster or longer, you train to run faster or longer. You might have a race when the pavement is wet, or you might trip, but it's really just you. Surfing is maybe closer - you can't control the waves and they each vary, but you and your board never change. Rock climbing is all you - but then you have the complexity of your climbing partner on the other end of the rope for all the time when you're not actually on the rock. For a rigid, inflexible, control-freak, perfectionist like myself, I think it's odd that I'd choose to spend all my time and money and apparently my 30s when I could be settling down, doing something that infuriates me because I can't control it - because Willig (or any horse) is his own self and responds in his own way, and requires constant adjustments and feelings.
But that's what all relationships are. Exasperation and frustration and guilt and effort and lots and lots of patience for the reward. You just can't TALK to Willig about it.
And this is why it was so hard for me to come back from the fall (well, the two in a row). It's a delicate balance for me as is. I need it, but I'm afraid of it because it's so contrary to my personality. It's the recognition that I'm not always 100% in control; that Willig, of all the horses I've had, is the most unpredictable. I don't know what kind of mood he'll be in each day (although, knock on leather, he's been more consistent and reliable before the break). And that - of all things - is what is hardest for me.
So it's a good life lesson. I have to learn to roll with it. It's just that rolling scares me. What if I start rolling and can't stop?

Three Miscellaneous Thoughts

2011-08-20T17:31:00.000-07:00

I completely forgot to mention Willig's stumble to Dr. Revenaugh (this is me: "Duh. I have no idea what could have happened any time in the last two weeks that would make him lame on his right front ... like when he stumbled and came up lame on his right front. It's probably from that time he fell down six months ago and never went lame from it."). However, I'm going to go with the glass half full approach and hope that because Dr. R didn't find anything in his hind, it's just some muscle soreness that I'm feeling (why he appears to work out of it and it's inconsistent) and give him more horsey massages more regularly (that horsey massage class I took 10 years ago will finally pay off!). And that his right front, whether or not caused by something pre-existing, will heal with his injection and 3 weeks of easy work, and he'll be good as gold in a month and we'll have all winter to really train.
Also, when J rode him last week, she mentioned in her report (she's so great and I'm going to miss her so much!) that he had a "nasty stop". Since she was like #1 in the nation and came in 2nd place at the national champs, I couldn't even begin to imagine what she would call a "nasty" stop. (She's also remarkably cool about stuff that I would put multiple exclamation points after in a blog post.) I was so curious I asked her, and she said at the "big" oxer we did in our last lesson, she thought they were jumping it, but then they were off to the right. He just did one of his infamous Willig hyperspeed run-outs. So that type of "nasty" I am all too intimately familiar with - it didn't exceed my imagination at all. It is a nasty habit though, that I'm not sure how to break (the spurs worked wonders, and will need further testing). (And I'm going to hope they came back because he was feeling a bit off and didn't have another way to express it. And continuing with the glass half full, praise him for being pretty much a trooper and not acting worse.)
Today I was at Caber, trying to volunteer to be a xc jump judge, and I got to watch the senior Novice riders for a while. This was very illuminating. Most (not all, but more than half) of the horses starting zigged and zagged on their way to the first fence while they got their bearings. This really surprised me because for some reason I assumed that was a Willig habit only. A few (not many, less than a handful of the ones I watched) were pretty nasty about it, which Willig never is. And these are horses going novice! With adults on them! The riders were also not as balanced as I would have expected for novice, and one fence in particular (#2, a big coop with some brush on top - we jumped it at the last derby) they seemed to have a hard time taking off at the right spot so I got to see the riders trying to adjust. Now, before my head gets too big, I'm pretty sure that anyone watching me would think the same thing, although I need more pictures (and video) as proof to myself. Particularly anyone watching me labor around that show jumping course.
But it gave me hope that maybe my perfectionism and the work we've been doing with Willig will have us ready (now for next year) to really tackle BN next year and not embarass ourselves too much. And being hopeful used to be in short supply and lately, the past few months, I've really been getting excited about him. Which means, of course, three weeks of walking is what our near future holds.

Lesson on Mardi

2011-08-18T18:59:00.000-07:00

Because Willig was beginning his three days of stall rest, I rode a fellow boarder's horse for my lesson. Mardi is a little cutie, but I think he's a couple hands smaller than Willig and he's much wider across his back.
At first, I kind of flailed around. It's weird how hard it was to ride someone who moved so differently than Willig. But after a few minutes, I got the hang of it and managed to adjust.
We did our basic 1st level movements, and while he was very different to ride and still needed work, in a lot of ways he was much easier. I've been trying to think how to describe it. He was like rowing in a calm lake. Willig is like being on water skis on the open ocean in a storm.
Now, the silver lining for Willig, mentioned by Mike before, is that he is so sensitive that when you have his attention on you (instead of the wall, spot, noise, outside, other horse, wall again!, etc.) and you're riding upper level tests (which I don't know how to do yet), you need that kind of delicate-doing-something-every-step reaction.
But for today, it was fun to ride someone new. I still had to work on mostly the same things (rounder, more consistent connection, better bend, relax my legs down), but just in a different way.
Since Willig will not be back to work for three weeks, Mike said for my next lesson I could probably ride one of his horses! COOL!

Coffin Joint Injection

2011-08-18T18:57:00.000-07:00

Willig's very slight intermittent lameness (that has gotten a little bit more frequent, although not worse - he almost always works out of it after a few minutes and it's been so mellow I haven't been able to isolate it) was a "wowza" on one of the flexion tests. We got x-rays, and he's got a touch of arthritis and some changes to his coffin bone, but nothing broken or that looks like navicular.
He's getting three days of stall rest with bute and a big bandage and hand walking, then three weeks of hand walking or gentle walk riding.
And if it gets better, then we'll be happy and I'll give him apples and kiss him.
He must be kind of a trooper to have not really let on that this was going on. I think it's been slowly building for at least a few months. Bad Mom. Bad.

Perspective

2011-08-14T20:18:00.000-07:00

A p.s. on my lesson. Shannon said that yes, at NWEC, Willig was being a bit of a pill and running out at the last possible second. She said he's really quick, and sometimes it seemed like he did it as he lifted to jump.
He has two kinds of run-out. The one where's he jiggy from the moment he sees the fence and gets jiggier as we approach it and I do nothing and eventually he runs out.
And then he has his "alternate-universe" run-outs where he's so fast I have no idea what happened.
It was a huge relief to me to know that he was doing alternate-universe run-outs at NWEC because I started to feel like a moron - I couldn't feel it coming - didn't know why I couldn't - but expected it - and then it still took me by surprise.
Shannon said if she'd been able to see them (and she was watching for them) she would have been yelling at me, but they were so fast and sudden, she didn't even have time to yell.
Now, that's not adding $5,000 to Willig's value or anything, but it does help me understand what's going on a little better.
WHY he gets in that mood? I don't know. Yet.

Some reflections

2011-08-14T20:01:00.001-07:00

Willig has an appointment with Dr. Revenaugh this week for his intermittent and very slight lameness, but I want to make sure that the running out and the lead changing isn't because something hurts. When I was looking back through this year's blog posts for mentions of it, it helped me to see the glass as half full - something I'm not particularly good at.
Almost a year ago, I did my first First level test at the sitting trot, and was ecstatic. This year, I can do one loop serpentines, have started collecting, can do this teeny 5-8 meter circle at the canter, can do walk/canter transitions, can lengthen, can do leg yields and shoulder-in - and none of that is a big deal at the sitting trot. I might not be at the top of my class, but this is really my first year riding first level, so that's actually pretty cool.
Especially because the entire show season pretty much sucked personally for me - too much stress at work and home, and not enough riding, even though the barn is always my refuge.
Not quite a year ago, I rode hopeful only a couple of times (three maybe?) and was tired and embarrassed riding it as old as I am and as big as Willig is, but thought this was going to be another year of not showing or having to suck it up and ride hopeful. And yet we've ridden BN and, most importantly, HAD FUN (!!!). Last year I thought the BN fences looked huge and impossible, and this year (other than the stupid ditch), even Novice looks ok.
I wasn't willing to give up eventing without a fight, but I wasn't sure that Shannon was going to be able to pull me out of my funk, and from what we were jumping a year ago to now - wow. (Also, a lot of this is also attributable to J's riding Willig once a week.)
And so yes, this was another year when I didn't get to do quite as much as I planned to do - now 3 years ago - when I got Willig. But I'm a much better rider than I was last year (and that's what really counts - even if I had to adjust what I thought I needed to get there), and I've learned a tremendous amount. At the beginning of the year, I gave up on Willig and listed him for sale, but that sort of set me free to let go of my expectations for him and just ride him the way he needed it - and that let me be open to the stuff I needed to learn with him. Yes, I would have achieved my goals faster if I bought a horse that fit me where I wanted to be 4 years ago, but then I wouldn't have learned all this cool stuff. (Plus, think of all the money Willig saved me by not being ready to go to most of the competitions! That's sarcasm.)
Anyway - so then I was thinking on the drive home, what else can I do?
Well, I need more time and money. If I could take one lesson a week, instead of every other week, from both Mike and Shannon, that would help tremendously. I don't know when I'll ever have the time for that.
Then if I could take him more places. Again, time and money.
Then if I could watch more of other riders - good ones and bad ones. Learn from other people's mistakes and see what a good collection looks like. This one is the most doable - I can watch videos of professionals, and I can hang out at lessons and listen, and volunteer at shows. Auditing is a little harder, but cheaper than riding myself.
And of course, then all the stuff we've been working on which just means more hours riding and less hours doing other things. My goal is to keep jumping him twice and week and riding him dressage four days through winter - giving him one day off (and me spending that day at the gym).
We'll see how far that brings us for next year this time. I hope it means we'll be placing at First level, schooling Second level reliably at home, placing at BN, and schooling Novice reliably.

Spurs are my new friends

2011-08-14T19:48:00.000-07:00

Shannon pulled out some honkin' spurs today (honkin' to me, after my THREE total times of wearing spurs - and the teeny tiny baby ones at that) after I foolishly said he didn't seem to respond at all to the baby ones. They were maybe an inch, and soft little round ends.
We went outside, and started warming up, where I showed her my idea of 'collection' and asked whether it was really. The answer, as I suspected from my dressage comments, is "no". She had a very simple solution - get some of my rides taped and watch them. If she's not there, watch them with her (or with Mike) later. Because what I feel (think back to "sitting up straight" for dressage seat) might not (likely IS not) accurate, and I have to see it - either in a mirror or on tape or in a photo, to really understand.
We started with a cross rail and worked on some 'close' distances - a ground pole on either side that Shannon inched in so he'd have to make himself more compact. He was in a pretty easy going mood today, so he was barely looking at the spooky stuff (the barrel sitting on top of the wall, the wadded up tarp). He was fine, but I couldn't get the right lead over the fence.
That's because I BARELY (like maybe an inch) put my leg back when I "ask" for it. And since Willig isn't a mind reader ...
Then we set up a little course. He refused the skinny. So then I used the honkin' spurs, and that's when I fell in love with them. My new BFFs.
I can twist my ankle faster than I can kick (who knows why) and so when he gives me a jig a couple strides out, I can twist my ankle on the jiggy side (usually the right) and then he straightens out again and goes over the fence. Eureka!
Shannon was also telling me to growl at him, and, like a bored teenager trying to get a kid to fall asleep by reading a book in the most boring tone possible, I'd say "grrr" in this weird, flat, monotone. Like a computer or robot reading the word "grrrr" only more boring and not funny. She was happy at least I made a noise, but it was a really stupid noise. I guess it was kind of funny, after the fact.
So he did ok on the course (we did it a couple times), but she had made it kind of small since he was such a ding bat at NWEC schooling (the last time I jumped), and so then she raised everything and added this decent oxer. I was carefully eyeing her when she was setting it up (to make sure it was hip height, not belly button height) and it was fine (top of hip) but then when we got further away, I noticed it had a "decent" spread (2'?) and it looked much, much bigger without her standing next to it. I was trying not to be a wimp, and she suggested I jump it with my eyes closed (which seemed worse than jumping it looking at it) so when I came around the corner towards it, I made myself breathe in and out and ... he just sailed over it. I even had the angle a bit funny, instead of facing it square, we jumped it like a corner, and good lord that horse can jump.
Shannon said my leg position is loads better, and she liked that I got him collected right up and headed towards the next fence in just a couple strides - instead of flailing about (my word) for half the arena. This is from last lesson - the 1-2-1-2 on the way to the fence keeps him together so that we don't rush at it, then land rushing.
So in addition to that big one (which is very wise, and I get that if I jump stuff like that (big, spread, skinny, ditch, corner, wall) at home, when I see it at the show, it will be smaller and I'll know I can do harder and so I'll be confident and have fun instead of pushing my upper limit, but each step up still makes me a bit nervous), she's also working on my position between fences now. Like we did at NWEC, sit in a three point until about 10 strides out, then lean back a bit, then sit up just a couple strides before the fence. This also requires some trusting of him, with my hands pressed into his neck, that is REALLY hard for me to do, and then that sitting up also adds the kick/jab if he's jiggy, which is also hard for me to do but I'm not as sure why (I'm afraid he'll buck on the landing?).
Anyway, it was a great lesson and a huge confidence builder, although when I was sure we were close to over time (so sure, I asked her), we were actually only a half hour in. Ha!
Afterwards, I went on a trail ride with my friend K, and we even trotted a bit. There was a lady walking her dog on the other side of the woods, and normally, that would have sent Willig over the edge (she kept coming in and out of view and stepping on sticks and stuff), but today he held it together pretty well.

Motivational Willig Jumping Quote

2011-08-13T20:03:00.000-07:00

"Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear."
- Ambrose Redmoon

Willig's dressage scores this year - we're consistently on the low end

2011-08-13T20:01:00.001-07:00

First level Test 1 (we only rode once)
4/16: 58.276

First level Test 2
4/16: 57.838
6/25: 60.270
6/26: 61.892
7/31: 56.216
8/7: 56.486
8/13: 63.243

First level Test 3
6/25: 57.742
6/26: 60.323
7/31: 50.645
8/7: 56.452
8/13: 59.355

Like an electron, you can know where Willig is or where he's going

2011-08-07T19:22:00.000-07:00

But not both at the same time. Continuing with the Willig or Anti-willig from last post, he started this morning in an extreme Anti-Willig mood. He did not want his mane braided, he did not want to be in the cross-ties, he did not want to be groomed. And then we got to the show and he was mr. nicey pants.
Mr. Nicey Pants, however, is a consistent (for this entire year) 56%, which I think sucks.
On Test 1-2, he got a 56.486%. He was humming along, actually performing well (6s, 7s), got a couple of 5s, then a bee flew in his ear - he shook his head - the bee flew out - he darted to the right, and - unfelt by me - changed his lead. So we got a 4 for the lead change (no mention of the bee - we were on the far corner from the judge), then a 2 (double coefficient) and another 2 because I didn't feel that damn change when we skittered sideways with a bee in his ear. That is kudos to Willig for being such an athlete I could ride the end of a movement and two more without noticing the wrong lead. And big frownies for me for not feeling that and correcting it. And super kudos for Willig for not going ballistic with a bee in his ear.
Then for 1-3, I was like "wow - Willig really pulled that one out" - there were a couple wobbles, but nothing major (until the end lengthening, when just before K he stumbled, acted like he was lame around the corner, then had a miraculous recovery for the centerline). And he did this ... while there was some sort of "can-we-make-these-guns-as-loud-as-fireworks" going on next door. They started shooting pretty much when our test started, and then intensified the volume and quantity of shots to the point where I started laughing while I was riding (Willig was a champ - didn't even flinch!) and it just kept up until we finished, then they quit. And other than tha stumble? Pretty smooth.
But no. My feeling of smooth is not Smooth. This was 6s, 7s, and a whole lot of 5s.
So I'm frustrated. I felt like we pulled a couple of 8s in both those tests, but we clearly did not. And these scores have been consistent all year, so I'm not doing something, but I don't know what it is.
Here's our two lousy pictures. A horrible one of us, and one of my stock tie done cute by our friend.

Will it be Willig ... or Anti-Willig?

2011-08-06T19:22:00.000-07:00

Willig means "willing" (roughly) in German. When I bought him, his name was Willy, and I had a German trainer, and Willy makes me think of those silly willies, so I kept the pronunciation mostly the same (i.e. not in Deutsch) and went with something that meant more to me.
So the "anti" in the title is when Willig is in one of his moods. Which he was when we went to school at NWEC yesterday. Now, when Willig is in one of his moods and I have a trainer, we learn tons and tons of stuff. But it's not fun.
Here are the high points:
Ride 2-point in between fences. About 10 strides out, sit up a bit. About 2 strides out, sit the rest of the way up.
The down bank is seat-glued-to-saddle. Question: How do you do that without ripping Willig's face? Answer: (did not come to me on my own, despite being told it last schooling) Let the reins out. Open your fingers. But not if he's in a bucky mood, then, just rip him in the face.
Ditches are still Willig's foes. Willig-eaters, he thinks. As an aside, today, in a halter with a long lead line, we spent - I don't know - 15 minutes? - jumping the one at home. That mostly consisted of me jumping back and forth and back and forth on my sprained ankle while he watched. But eventually, he got it. And by "got it", I mean he would exaggeratedly rock back, then lurch forward like a rocket with the propulsion system set too high - stumble furiously on the far side - and then vigorously eat grass like nothing happened.
Pull him the OPPOSITE way of the way he is trying to dart out. If he's trying to go right, pull left. Not pull right so he makes a circle to the right. (This is very, very heavily ingrained in me. I finally got it correct a couple of times, but only after Shannon had the opportunity to say it, oh, approximately 25 times.)
Growl, kick, click, whip, WHATEVER, just do something on the way to the fence when he is hesitating. I got one pitiful click and Shannon whooped with joy - at this enormous old growth log that I swear was 3' around. The time before he had refused it, managing to run out PAST a second old growth (even bigger), before I yanked left (we were going right) and then we clambered over it. Clambered. My friend's mom said he kind of had to tippy toe with his back feet on the log. (But to say something nice about Willig, he hopped right in and out of their trailer like he's a trailer king. Theirs is a 4-star and I really like it compared to mine, which now has peeling paint.)
When Willig is in a naughty/bucky/disobedient/lazy mood, he has to work harder to not jump the fences than to just go over them already. (He was the opposite of our Caber xc ride and our last schooling at NWEC and our last schooling at home. So he fooled me into thinking he was over himself and we were just going to jump from now on.) He might have to gallop. He might have to make a 10 meter canter circle. He might have to do some crazy leg yielding. But in all of this - I ride with my hands pushed into his neck just in front of the breastplate.
And here is the miraculous discovery, that wouldn't have happened if he hadn't been being such a shit. I let go - about two strides out I completely let go of the reins - I put them up on his neck in anticipation of the fence (I don't jump ahead, I just go ahead and shove my hands up) and ... THAT'S HOW HE'S ALWAYS RUNNING OUT.
Duh.
Now - I have my reasons for doing this, but the common sense effect, and the whole "why does he keep running out?" question never connected these for me, until Shannon told me to clamp my hands, and I was like "well then how do I let go before the fence?" and to her credit, she didn't laugh out loud at me.
What else? Willig can jump big jumps. The bigger the jump, the easier he is to ride (in the air). It's easier to balance and not jump ahead if he's jumping something that he actually puts some effort into. This has been dawning on me, but got cemented over that old growth log. The part where we take off and are in the air and landing - piece of cake and like heaven. The part a few strides out and a few strides after still needs work. But my lord, the flying part - I don't want to do anything else with my life but keep improving so I can do that more.
Three people had told me he had been bucking in the stall that morning, but I was so excited about going to school that I ignored it. (Another huge thing disguised there. I have pretty much hated jumping for the last 2 years, and for the last 6 months, that hate has been turning back into love. Thanks to Shannon.) And then he started out terrified of the woods, running out over utility pole sized fences, charging the fences, and taking off afterwards. Then, horrors, some people walked by on the trail, and that's when he started the bucking, and did this rodeo routine in a circle for a while.
The good news? I'm not scared of the fences (except the ditch) anymore, or the heights, and I'm not scared of falling off because my position and my "toolkit" are so much better than they were last year.
The bad news? I still can't get him over fences when *I* want him to go over them without a lot of struggle and a lot of instructions yelled from Shannon. It must be exhausting for her to teach me. I am so slow to respond and then I immediately do it wrong the very next time, with the very same clues ahead of time.
So he was refusing, bucking (little bucks), etc. and then we did the ditch a few lengths behind our friend, and victory was ours! He just lept right over it! And then just as quickly, we were snatched from the jaws of victory into the stronghold of defeat because he stumbled, went down on his knees (nothing to do with the ditch), and then came up lame on his right front leg. Which he held out, shaking, until he saw the tractor, then he forgot he was lame to look at the tractor. So we tried the ditch again after a few laps of checking him out - no victory in sight. After a couple tries, Shannon sent us back to the baby ditch (the bank) to do it by ourselves (that alone was a small triumph for me), then back to the ditch behind our friend. Nope. He was wise to the evil tricky ways of the ditch. So then I got off, so Shannon could lead him over it. He hesitated, looking, lept huge, and lept so huge she had to let go of the reins, which he almost immediately stepped on, broke, and then started to trot back to the trailer - just slow enough to taunt us. Well, my friend's mom thought fast, pulled a granola bar out of her pocket, and the rascal turned around and came back for the granola bar. Then we made one long rein, which worked great for his super-launches, and Shannon led him over the ditch over and over (which begs the question why the one at home was such a huge deal with me today). And we quit on that.
It was very, very educational.
What I can't decide on are the three remaining recognized shows. While I think he isn't going to improve any riding at home, with timid me, I think it might be too much for this year. I think I'm going to ride the remaining derby, volunteer at the next two shows, and then hopefully ride the final show of the year. And then we'll work hard all winter to be ready for as much as we can afford next spring. Because I don't think we'll be bringing home many $300 ribbons. But the year after that ... we'll be rock stars.

Another great lesson on a great day

2011-08-04T19:09:00.000-07:00

This photo is of us warming up back at the FPEC show in June.
I (heart) summer. I'm so much happier once there's a cool breeze and a warm sun and long days, especially when I'm at the barn most of the day instead of at work. Today was my day off, and I got to drop off my trailer at the shop, let Willig out in the grass for a bit (he was good; just ate), leisurely groomed him, and warmed him up. It was a busy morning in the arena, which was good practice for me, since I usually ride alone at night, and it also kept me motivated to stay after my lesson and watch the next two lessons which was really, really useful.
First, we reviewed my tests from the last show. Mike said he heard about the scores already, and that if I just imagined each one was 2 points higher, it would probably be more what I was expecting. He told me about someone who got an 80 something at the previous show, and was in the 50s there! That made me feel a lot better, and means I was right to look at the 1st place and see that the scores were all low, and that it wasn't that my efforts to "ride an 8" were totally wrong. (Although from what I described, he said I should try to finesse it and only ride ugly if it's the only way to get the movement - rather than let Willig misbehave.)
Then we worked on the couple of things that I had asked about - coming across the diagonal at a canter, then around the corner trotting, then lengthening the trot - that lengthen is always ugly. And about using the baby spurs (no problem).
Mike said our leg yields were great, and then did a lot of polishing.
When I ask him for a transition, he needs to give it without flinging his head up. If he does, I go back and do it again.
He still needs to be more responsive. The first one is a gimmie (after he's been slacking), then he gets a whip tickle, then he gets a whip welt.
This can be done with things like trot, then two steps walk, then trot again.
Then we worked on his canter, which has gone back to being a bit strung out.
Important point: a leg yield aid is NOT with your leg back. (Then when I watched the lessons I saw better how this works for the next steps with shoulder-in, renvers, and travers.)
So the lengthening secret? He's already lengthening plenty, and I'm asking him for more when I should be working on keeping him balanced and together. If I would get the lengthen, then spend the other 2/3 keeping him pulled together, the whole thing flows better.
We ended with the magical, elusive "poof". This is the trot, and then I keep the same 1-2-1-2, but I half-halt while asking with my legs and kind of suck him up, and he elevates his forehand (I think?) and then he gets light for a few steps, and then I let him go back to normal. We just do it for a few steps, but I'm pretty sure this is the floaty thing that happens when Mike rides him for a few minutes, and ... I could make it happen! I don't entirely understand how it works, or even that I've described the aids properly, but when I was riding, I was getting it!
Willig was super obedient and nice today, even twice, due to rider steering error, going under the sprinkler. Mike said a lot of the movements were 7s and 8s, and he was really pleased with how far we've come and how we look. Me too. It's nice to ride Willig on a good day like this.
And it was so useful to watch the other lessons, because instead of concentrating on trying to ride the movement, I could listen to what Mike was saying and watch what happened with the horse. I need to audit more things and watch more lessons - it was super educational.

Overwhelmingly underwhelming - Donida

2011-07-31T20:44:00.001-07:00

Sticking with the theme of "this isn't going to be a rock star year", we got a 50.645% on Test 1-3 and a 56.216% on Test 1-2 at Donida today.
We got 4s and 5s. Shudder.
Now, for the most part, this was because Willig and his friend Al acted like they had never, ever seen a judge's stand before, and so pretty much every movement that required passage past the judge's stand was a couple points lower than normal.
In fact, that's all I really want to report on it. This is the highest level I've ever ridden in dressage, but we'll certainly be doing first level again next year and not second level.
Next weekend is Summervale, and my goal is to improve. Which shouldn't be hard to do.

The good news is it's not me being an idiot by myself

2011-07-30T19:49:00.000-07:00

Willig can be kind of a snake in the grass about jumping. He darts out, really fast, sometimes at the last minute, without a whole lot of warning.
So I can:
- Feel the dart coming sooner; and/or
- React faster.
But that's about it. I know what to do, I'm just not recognizing he's going to dart in time, or reacting in time once I feel it about to happen.

So today we started with the wall. Here's three pieces of good news. First, I can now ride him on a loose rein past the scary end - ho-hum - that just a few months ago I was enviably watching J do and thinking I'd never be able to do that on Willig. Second, I don't get a knot in my stomach the day before my jump lesson. And in fact, this week when I jumped him by myself, I was looking forward to it all day. Yippee! Third, we started with the wall. The solid wall that a year ago I wouldn't even try, and 6 months ago, I did pretty much crying and definitely holding my breath only because I was in a lesson with Shannon. Now it doesn't even look big or imposing. It's just a jump. Yay! Yay! Yay!

Shannon wanted to start with the wall instead of dinking around over a cross rail to make him snap to it. She also suggested that I try some baby spurs she's got because he's getting kind of lazy and inclined to ignore my aids, even though I've gotten better about not anaconda squeezing the aid non-stop.
So as we turned towards the wall - I mean just turned, like 20 - 30' away - he refused. He ran out. So she made us make 10 meter circles in front of the wall, thinking leg yield him toward it, and inching closer and closer and then popping over it.
We did this both directions and then with the lattice and then with the skinny (the three he refused when I was by myself earlier in the week). The point was that it's way more work to be all ditchy, and he might as well just go over it when I point him at it.
The other big thing was getting his attention. He's trying to look at the jump, or another jump, or a thing under a jump, or the poodle, or the pasture, or Shannon, or anything that is not listening to me. So giving a leg aid, asking him to leg yield, giving a smack with the whip, making a noise - so that his attention refocuses on me. This applies in between fences too.
To fix this Shannon also suggested taking scary stuff (like the tarp that's out there and hanging it over a fence) and not jumping, but just riding 6" past it, so that he learns he has to go where I say when I say it, and that it's less work and less scary to just be obedient. She said there was no obvious reason for the ditching (a couple times, I was grabby, but it wasn't causing the ditching).
So then the other big thing we worked on was rhythm. Coming in saying 1-2-1-2 (at the canter) and then when he lands, he likes to dive and kind of barrel along on his forehand, so give him a few really strong half-halts, pull him back up, and then get him back to 1-2-1-2, but not plummeting to a trot or walk (like I usually do) and not riding him all grabby and scared after every fence. It helps me enormously to say it loud to myself on the way to the fence and as soon as we land.
And then to try, even if he comes in fast and flat, not to pull back before the fence, but to let him go.
Although it was lame he was ditching, it was good to deal with it, so that I know that I'm working on the right thing when I'm by myself (and not making it worse) and to just keep plugging away at it. He's kind of a kook. Today he didn't give a rat's ass about the blue barrels, which are normally the bane of his outdoor existence.

I have NEVER ridden with spurs in my life - my lower leg has always been too bad - so it will be very interesting! Which is another good thing - whether Willig comes in short, low, fast, long, or just right - I have been feeling so good and balanced in the air. Shannon got me my jumping seat back!

Another thing I learned from Pony Club D Manual, which apparently every one, including 6 year olds, knew and I didn't, is that you are supposed to clean your tack, then oil it, then saddle soap it. My entire life I have been saddle soaping and then oiling. And clean the tack with a moist, warm sponge after every ride.

I also just finished Jane Savoie's, "It's not just about the ribbons" which I liked. Some of the visuals were helpful, and it was a good reminder to have a positive attitude instead of thinking about negatives. I've been trying to visualize riding my dressage tests instead of just thinking the pattern.

I continue to need lessons to slowly learn the blindingly obvious, once learned

2011-07-21T18:48:00.000-07:00

I had a dressage lesson today, where I bemoaned my fair, but disappointing, dressage scores, particularly the 5 on a right 20 meter trot circle, where, irony of all ironies, he was counterbent - to the LEFT (the side Mike has to basically wrestle me into bending at all towards even when we're already going left).
Mike had three suggestions for moving from 6s to 7s:
1) Increase the connection. I'm riding all kind and soft, with the attitude "oh, please, Mr. Willig, won't you pick up the connection, wouldn't that be nice?" instead of telling him and then picking it up, like the assertive person that I am (when people are using the nice word (assertive) instead of their other choices). This is probably the same problem over fences, that my fellow boarder observed ("I didn't hear you growl when he was intending to refuse?")
2) Increase the bend. Look at his inside eyelashes. Make him do it. We practiced this by clamping my outside hand onto his withers, and then pulling my inside hand to my hip bone. He can do it; and he doesn't mind doing it. It's my pansy attitude.
3) Make him sparkle by trotting on the verge of lengthening. Don't ride it delicate or conservative - it's 5-6 minutes of my life - ride every second and ride it hard. This extra oomph is what's missing - I get timid at a show because I don't want to mess up, so I ride the test conservatively instead of going for the 8 and maybe breaking in a movement and getting a 4.
The other things we talked about:
- I drew a picture of what I thought shoulder in, haunches in, renvers, and travers looked like, because I'm having trouble with where he is and where I am and how I ask for them. And it turns out, that's because I was visualizing them wrong. So Mike re-drew them, then also showed me on the ground, then at the end of the lesson, made me ride each one. I have some kind of mental block about this, so I'm going to have to study the drawings, practice with my body, and then practice, practice, practice. The big thing I got out of today, was - like using my canter aid further back from my last lesson - I'm not moving my legs (outside leg aid, inside leg aid) just squeezing like an anaconda - so how in the world would he know which of those he's supposed to be doing?
- If I want Willig to "sparkle" in his tests and start getting 7s and 8s instead of 6s (something the test scores have consistently said this year is pretty much that we're on the cusp and need to take that step), I need to RIDE him like a 7 and 8 during my rides; not just with Mike. This is the "slowly learning the blindingly obvious" part of the title of this post. Sometimes it is embarrassing how long it takes me to catch on to something that is really common sense. If out of 14 rides, 13 are lazy, why in the world would he think the 1/14 is the goal?
- I struggled with riding into the corners from our last lesson. That's because I was overdoing it. Mike said for Training and 1st level, it's ok to start your corner 5 meters from the corner (about quarter line between C and M, for example) and then end it about 5 meters from the corner (about the letter, which I think is 6 meters). So I don't have to ride him deep in the corner (yet - they do at upper levels).
- The 7 minute warm up? While not ok at a recognized show, Mike said a younger horse or a horse at the lower level can be ready to go - it's a mental block on my end. And I immediately thought of other times I wouldn't neurotically be there two hours ahead of time (traffic jam, flat tire, won't load, forget something), so that ended up being a good opportunity to think and learn about how to handle that differently in the future. (Although yes, we probably would have had more sparkle with my 45 minute warm up. And ok, probably the refusals in show jumping were because I didn't warm up there either, because I didn't like the footing.)
- Make Willig respond. The first time is ok, but he better go by the second. And it shouldn't be me doing the work but him. When I give the canter aid, he better canter that second - not when he feels like it four seconds later.
- For example, the stretchy circle needs to stretch by the time we start the circle, not half way around. When I ask for shoulder-in, I want it on the first step, not half way down the arena.
- His leg yields were very nice. Think about being a waitress holding a very heavy tray and keeping everything together the whole movement - don't let him wobble half way after he starts really nice.
- I think there was something else brilliant, but it's escaping me at the moment.

Non-lesson thoughts:
When I was cleaning his feet before I rode, he kicked me with his hind feet (made contact with first one, I was ready for second one), so after I rode I utilized my very dusty and rusty horse massage skills, and woo-weeeee Willig had some knots. I feel sorry for him. So I gave him a vitrolin rub and tried to rub out the biggest knots, and I'll try again this weekend.
I also finished reading the Pony Club D manual, where I somewhat horrifyingly learned a few things I didn't know. There's an adult pony club called Horse Masters, but it doesn't look like anyone has started one in Olympia yet.
And for the next two recognized shows, I'm going to volunteer for each of the segments and try to learn through observation (something I have been woefully inadequate on for a few years now), and then MAYBE sign up for NWEC.

Last two show jumping

2011-07-17T22:12:00.000-07:00

My barn friend got some great shots (in addition to saving my neck with the changed dressage ride time), although I missed out on a cheap photographer deal for xc.
I took the best xc shot and made it the new entry photo. What I like the best is ... I'm smiling! I'm having a good time over the last fence!
(Ok, and I like my position too.)

Show jumping

2011-07-17T22:07:00.000-07:00

In the rain.
Although these are small (and I'm on the other side of the arena and it's raining), I like how much my position has improved if you look back at old (wincingly bad position) pictures in the blog.

CVPC Derby

2011-07-17T21:48:00.000-07:00

What a mixed bag!
There was a mix-up with my entry, and although they didn't have it, they graciously included me Sunday. But then my dressage time changed from 1:30 to 11:30 after the last time I checked. So when I leisurely pulled in, expecting to go walk the course a couple of times, it turns out I had 15 minutes to tack up Willig and warm up. Thanks to my barn friends (they did the grooming and tacking while I changed clothes) I shot over to the check-in with about 7 minutes to warm up. But the two riders before me didn't show, so after only about two laps of trot, they asked me if I would go ahead! I asked for a couple more minutes, and then after a whopping 3 minutes of warm up, we rode the dressage test.
And scored the right score for the test, but a lousy score for the class. #18 out of 24! There was a stupid error on my part (I halted at x) which wouldn't have mattered whether my test had been two hours later or not, but that was kind of discouraging since it's Willig's strongest suit.
Then the footing was not so great in the show jumping warm up, so I only popped a couple of fences. Although Willig was a tiny bit squirrely, it was only a tiny bit, so I merrily made my way towards fence 1, which he tried to refuse, and then popped from a walky-stop thing, shooting me out of the stirrups but back onto his back, and I only just barely got them on again for fence 2. This was a course with a lot of "tight" turns (for airplane carrier manuverability Willig), so then we may or may not have had a run-out at the last second at 3, and then definitely a run out at 4, where I didn't yank the opposite way, but got him right back in front of the fence and beat him while he tried to jump it from a halt, and then I felt sorry for him and turned around and he jumped 4-9 fine.
But the xc course had the teeniest, tiniest ditch (it was disguised behind a ground pole), and show jumping plus the "ditch", plus then warm-up for xc (Willig started bucking when he landed) got my nerves all a twitter. And so, for the part I was the nerviest about, Willig was a champ. He tried to stop at fence 2 (I chose the direct, taller route - using the very precise leg/crotch measuring system both fences 2 and '10' were novice height), and I had vacillated whether to go there at the 2nd fence. I decided to becuase a) I saw Zoe being scared of the jump judges at the long route, b) fence '10' was even bigger, and c) the taller alternate was hemmed in so it was harder to run-out. So he did one of his walky-jumps, but after that was a total, absolute rock star, who utterly redeemed himself from his show jumping hijinks.
We only came in #14 (out of 24) at the end, but for Willig's first go Beginner Novice? I'm pretty stoked. I'm not sure it's worth it to ride recognized this year, but I think we'll be ready for sure next season.
By the by, when I was riding yesterday to get ready, I tried to think of the most scary way we could ride. I took him straight outside and worked only at poodle side until a nasty downpour made us run for the indoor. And a lot of our home fences are 2'11" now, and I just want to point out (to myself) - from last year to this year? HUGE PROGRESS. That's huge. Amazing. I didn't think we'd make it how last year was going.
So now it's just going back and refocusing on WHY he refuses the show jumps and how to stop those last minute run-outs. I suspect they're only last minute to me - that someone on the ground can see them coming a few strides out.

Willig remembered our deal; I didn't

2011-07-15T21:19:00.000-07:00

Two lessons ago, we rode the Forest Park xc fences, and I made a deal with Willig that if he could be the rockstar, I'd get him the next time. So he was.
Then, the next time was in the downpour schooling at NWEC, I asked him to just cart me one more time, and I'd get him the next time. So he did.
And then I promptly forgot that Willig has ever been the slightest bit difficult and today rode him like a little delicate pansy until he made sure I remembered the deal and actually rode him - in the freakishly bizarre second rain storm we've ridden in. It's MID-July!!!
Take-aways:
1. Shannon said if I feel comfortable at the canter then I'm not going fast enough. Take it up just a little notch. (Same goes for her, which always helps me to hear.)
2. RIDE. Him. Assertively. Poor Shannon, having to say that every freaking lesson for two years now. When he's in an ADD mood, I have to ride every second of every step (but not over ride; just be ready for the corrections). He was doing some quick spins and run-outs today, and even though it felt like a slow motion train wreck coming, I just couldn't get my act together to correct it before it happened, and he'd spin, and I'd circle and we'd take the fence. The baby step good news is that we don't have to putter around for an hour in between the bad behavior and the next fence.
3. Ride him in front of my leg, in a defensive posture, with my legs in front of me, and my seat deep, and let him lift me over the fence. i.e. Stop overjumping. When he's coming in short or long, I tend to overjump because I'm anxious because I feel that we're short or long.
4. Use whip, voice, leg. Do not start pulling. Give him a long approach to look at the fence. Particularly if he's having an ADD moment.
I think those are the high points. It was a good lesson because I jumped him Wednesday and he was easy and fine, so I came in with a really "he's cooooolll, dude" kind of approach. Which is fine if he's cool, but I'm not adapting quickly enough. So although I'm disappointed he was in a mood, I'm glad we had the learning opportunity in the lesson BEFORE the show. And I have my fingers crossed for a good Willig/good riding day there.

Patience with Willig = ROCKSTAR Willig!

2011-06-29T19:29:00.000-07:00

I got Willig about 3 1/2 years ago (if I'm remembering correctly). Because we couldn't get his hives under control, I ended up leaving my trainer's barn, and spent the next year working with him by myself.
I am pretty sure, in hindsight, that the last 3 years have been undoing the damage I did in that year by myself. This wasn't entirely by myself, because I also took Willig to some clinics, and that's where we ended up with the really bad fall (trying to jump a ditch - well, successfully jumping the ditch, and then bucking until I flew off) that made me scared until ... today.
And yes, I had nerves again on my way out, and earlier in the week tried to back out using the weather as an excuse.
Well, weather be damned, we just had a great schooling cross country day, even with a total downpour at the end.
Willig jumped EVERY. SINGLE. FENCE. except the "last" one, and then Shannon made us do the course we were doing three more times (mostly because I didn't make a big deal out of it).
He has a harder time with courses than single fences, and an even harder time when there's multiple fences (I think it's horse ADD, and he doesn't know where to focus). So Shannon said at the next show (we're signed up Beginner Novice!) to give him nice long approaches, put his attention on the fence, sit down a few strides out, and ride him assertively! Kick, cluck, growl, use the stick.
He jumped a bunch of log piles of various sizes, some of which looked Novice to me. He jumped off a bank. I had a hard time not jumping, and keeping my butt planted in the saddle and letting the reins run out, so this took a few tries, but he was a trooper every time.
He went in and out of the water, and jumped a bank out of the water.
He had a couple jigs were he came close to a halt (definitely a walk) but jumped BN height totally, totally fine from a walk/halt.
And mostly - he jumped like a dream. We go left pretty badly after each fence (I have no idea what I'm doing to make that happen), but my heels and legs felt GREAT, and even with the few awkward ones, I felt nice and balanced over his back.
And then we did a little 4-fence BN course, with brush in front and a hill and everything, in the slick wet tall grass, and other than the jig and half-ass refusal (and then jumped from the halt), he was gorgeous! It was fun again!
Except for Shannon, her daughter, Willig, and me were just completely soaking. Shannon and her daughter's feet were totally soaked (mine were too from the lunging), and I had my helmet, but each time I glanced down water just poured onto my saddle. So I really, really, really appreciated them being out there to help me out.
And now I am actually looking forward to the rest of this year's show season. We may just make a recognized show at the end of the season!
A few other reflections:
Shannon came out and schooled with me last year sometime. That time, he had a few bucking episodes, and it took us like 20 minutes to jump the bank the first time. NOTHING like that this time! Progress! Grass growing!
The "good rider" book I was raving about a few posts back talks about how even a great rider gets nerves, but the good reward feeling he gets at the end is proportional to the nerves at the start. I've been reminding myself of that when I get that knot in my stomach. That knot means good things are coming ... even maybe sometimes a few hours away.
The patience approach that Mike and Shannon advocated worked. We backed WAY off from what we were trying to do in the clinics, and they told me to trust it and take my time, and lo and behold - he's like a different horse. And he's not jumping them out of terror, but actually jumping them. And he's a gorgeous jumper to ride - he has a moment of suspension that is just divine in the air.
So, yes, of course I wished that I didn't mess up for those few years, but I learned some good stuff. And since we're not superstars (just rockstars), Willig has lots of good years left (he's 10 this year) to really improve on this stuff and make a lot of progress in dressage.

1-2 & 1-3 scores

2011-06-26T17:54:00.000-07:00

61.892% (1-2)
57.742% (1-3 - he did not feel like he should have to work again - it was an ugly test)
60.270% (1-2 - it did feel slightly less great than the first one, but pretty good)
60.323% (1-3 - it felt WAY better than the prior test, but only went up <3%!)

The consistent comment was:
More connection

The secondary comments were:
Haunches are in (crooked) a lot
Hollow
Needs better balance
Needs rounder topline
More stretch at stretchy circle
Head tilt

Looking spiffy at Dressage in the Park

2011-06-26T16:27:00.001-07:00

Tips for 1st level

2011-06-23T20:52:00.000-07:00

In today's lesson, we started with canter, and then worked on my leg aid - thinking about swinging my legs like scissors (something remarkably painful to do - I need to do more hip opener stretches at home), and then asking for the canter thinking about my leg back touching my saddle pad. Mike got draw reins for Willig so I'd have one less thing to think about, and I also learned that they can be attached to the girth OR under their belly!
Willig was pretty leery of both ends of the arena (judge's stand, weirdly placed stuff outdoors), but in a way, it makes him easier to ride because he's got more get-up-and-go, but I'm also thinking that both ends are scary, and so I ride pretty much the whole arena instead of slacking off on the non-scary side.
Then, after some of the "regular" work (quick responses to quick changes - walk-stop-trot-stop-walk-canter-etc.) I rode both my tests.
Here's the take aways:
- Remember to start the movement before the letter. If I'm turning left at C (from X) to extend at H, then start revving him up at C.
- It's ok to use the whip to get the movement correct (but not cluck).
- Make everything bigger and more exaggerated. It feels exaggerated to me, but it's really not. Make the lengthened canter enormous - like those horses at the Olympics who are rearing back and LIFTING their front legs - instead of Willig, plowing his way to China. Mike said the lengthen needs to at least double from what I think is crazy fast.
- A 15 meter circle is smaller than I think it is.
- And for some reason, I was off on all my letters - undershooting them like I was in a 3/4 size arena.
- On the counter canter loop, spend a couple of strides on the center line before going back over.
- Don't let his head/neck bend too much on leg yield.
- Same as lengthening canter - actually lengthen the trot - but don't throw him away. Get that "lift" and skip in the steps.
- Our centerline and halt is a bit crooked. Feel that, and correct very lightly (he very quickly overcorrects to haunches out the other direction). (This one is a follow up for a future lesson because it seems to be coming from crookedness in me.)
- It's ok to walk a couple steps to get a square halt (and to walk a couple to go back to trot).
- I can spend quarterline to quarterline on the lead change, so trot at quarterline, get him readjusted, and then ask for lead change before the other quarterline.
- Ride him forward in the scary corners so he doesn't have an opportunity to break.
- Medium walk should have momentum. I lollygag. Willig has a nice walk (naturally) so I'm diminishing our opportunity to take advantage of the double coefficient!
- More stretchy on the stretchy circle (and warm up with some stretchy, not with holding him all rigid and tight).
- The judge is looking for the momentum mostly.
No wonder I feel like I never get it all. These are just Mike's tips to help us take off the rough edges just from 12 minutes of riding in a 45 minute lesson. I need to start recording and transcribing the lessons to catch more of it!

SPECTACULAR Willig! Cross-country champion!

2011-06-19T21:33:00.000-07:00

Beginning mid-morning today, I had a big, nasty ball of fear in my stomach about today's lesson. I had intellectually intelligently asked Shannon to jump the x-c jumps outside, but emotionally wrenchingly didn't want to. And yesterday Willig was full of pep and vinegar, and although I was able to warm him up on the non-scary side of the arena, I gave up and put him on the lunge line (where he lunged himself for 30 minutes with mucho bucking) for the far side. (I did ride him both dressage tests after that, but he was pretty sweaty and jerky.) This wasn't entirely his fault, because I had a week where each day went wrong on its own, making his only ride with J on Thursday.
The course was down because the arena got dragged this week, so Shannon had us warm up on a circle (Willig needs to pay attention and be very responsive to my aids. And when he ignores me, whip him and make the "eettcch!" sound), then in between the standards (scary pile of stuff), then down a bit farther (where of course, the *&#&*(#& poodle came out).
Then she set up trot ground poles, both directions, then canter ground poles, both directions, then a big canter ground poles that eventually I had to do in a 2-point both directions. Then a cross-rail, both directions, a vertical, both directions, a vertical that sneaky got higher in between, both directions, and then an oxer that got fairly impressive looking. This didn't take nearly as long as it sounds.
The message was ride him assertively, and RIDE him to the fence. Look at it as I come around the corner, give him a couple of balancing half-halts but keep him MOVING towards it, and then sit back, kick him, and let him jump it.
The oxer especially, it helped me to think 1-2-1-2 about half way across on the circle (if the fence was 3:00, I started thinking it at 9:00) to help me keep the rhythm and not rush or slow down towards the fence. It also helped me breathe, which I was having a hard time doing.
Then we went out into the field.
We went straight to the little baby log from a trot. Willig tried immediately to dart left, then dart right when that didn't work, and I jammed him over it. And Shannon said, at the end, that it set the stage for the rest of the jumps. I was supposed to ride him straight after, trot, then halt. Then we turned around and jumped it again, heading back towards the barn. And he was hard to stop. So Shannon showed me how to plant one hand on his neck, and use the other hand to pull (and release) HARD. So we flipped back and forth like that for a while.
Then she set up blue barrels next to the next fence, and we had to jump those both directions. And the message was: "don't jump like a pansy". Ride him to the jump, even if I'm scared, ESPECIALLY if he's scared too.
By the way, I had offered Willig a deal when I was getting him out of the paddock. If he'd take care of me today, with my big ball of fear in my gut, I'd take care of him next time. And he pretty much came through for me.
So then we jumped little log, turned around, and came back and jumped barrels.
And then we jumped little log, turned around, and came back and jumped novice level angle.
And oh. my. lord. Willig jumped like an angel.
And we did it again. And he jumped it like an angel again.
So with my jaw hanging open, other than begging Shannon to stop while we were ahead (and she pointed out she had three decent x-c size fences, so we were doing three fences), we went to the intimidating looking log pile. It has, maybe 1' length logs, but two big piles on the end, so it looks big, so she said Willig could look at it. And we approached it at what felt like an awfully fast walk for stopping in front of it, and then I felt him rock back on his haunches, and she said he lifted his front leg, ready to clamber over it like he is supposed to do! He's hilarious.
We actually jumped it from the other direction, going around a patch of scary trees (birds must sit in there and make noises or something), and he ... jumped it like an angel. And then again.
He was totally carrying me and while he looked at each one, he didn't hesitate for a second, and he jumped them like a sweet, floating pegasus.
So then we went to the one that looks the most intimidating to me - it's on a bit of a hill going down and has a log in front of it, so it looks bigger (Shannon swears it's not). And we walked towards it first, to get our line, and then swooped right around and trotted it.
...
Angel again.
He just jumped it divine.
And I started laughing and patting him and then: "Eeek! A bird! Holy shit!" and he spun around and I lost my stirrup, but thanks to his new improved spooking, he just stopped after that.
So we jumped it again. Angel jumping, but spooked at the bird again.
So we rode circles, leg yielding out towards the tree with the bird, and then jumped it again, and then Mr. Perfect did a perfect straight line with an ear towards the bird but that was it.
He was divine.
So all that patience has, maybe, paid off. That's an important lesson for you kids. Trust your trainer and build his confidence, even if you want to do something bigger. And also, most of this - ok, for today, all of this - is coming from me and my scary fall and wow - that really did a number on my mental side.
So I'm going to stick with the program because if we can get really comfortable doing this at home, the shows will be no big deal.
Yay, yay, yay Willig!

Leg yields, bend, and lengthening

2011-06-09T20:50:00.000-07:00

I asked for help with three issues in today's lesson: test 1-3's right hand 10 meter circle at X to a left leg yield to H we're still trailing the haunches; Shannon's observation that I ride heavy on the hand corrections and not so much on the leg; and the lengthenings might just be "speedenings".
Since I had, remarkably, already warmed up by the time my lesson started (instead of racing in the arena 5 minutes before it started, despite my best efforts to be early, which is my usual m.o.), we got right into leg yields. First we rode shoulder-in down the walls, then down the fake line that is the test size. Then we started riding from the corner to the center line. Big message here: make him do it. Ask for it and then demand it if he doesn't fly off my leg.
By the way, that's the theme from today's lesson. When I ask, he should do. Crisp, prompt responses to my aids, not 4-5 steps of slugging around.
Second big message: counterbend a bit as we come around the corner. So to start the leg yield at K, at A I start preparing by bending him a bit left.
Another big message: my motorcycle corners? This is how I need to fix them. I bend him more and more the direction we're going (for A to K, that's right) and he collapses further and further in. I need to counter bend him to the left so that we come around the corner (deeply) and emerge a straight horse. While this feels crooked, like we're all crazy bent to the left - not only is the feeling deceptive, but Mike says over time, you go from gross scale (yelling) to fine scale (whispering).
In addition to the shoulder-ins for warm up, also just do the western straight across side pass. Then the leg yield feels easy.
Willig was actually doing this really well today. It's mostly me bending him the "wrong" way, and then preparing and applying that same activity on the last quarter of the 10 meter circle, which is harder.
It's ok also to think "shoulder-in" if he's trailing, so if we're going from X to H, shoulder in for a moment to the right and then it fixes the trailing.
The next big thing we did, after the light bulb moment about the corners, was my difficulty with the physical part of the big circle haunches in we started last lesson. With Mike, it makes sense. On my one, I get all confused about where everything is supposed to be. I can think of 3 new things at once, but not 6, and Mike pointed out it pulls a lot of things together. So if you're making a big haunches in circle to the right, it's your right leg and right rein 'steady', and then your left leg asking WHEN THE LEFT HIND LIFTS (this is hard to feel on a little circle for me) and the left rein flexing and the left hand using the whip. So mostly, I think I just need to keep working on this until it starts to congeal in my head.
Then we did another huge epiphany - we were trotting to get ready for canter to get ready for lenghtening, and Mike made me really ride him, not to dawdle around and let him crash around on his forehand. And when I pulled him all together and really pushed (this was, by the way, at least 10x harder than my normal riding; I was almost instantly out of breath), I felt the puff in his shoulders!! The puff that is there when Mike gets off that makes him so easy to sit on?!? I did it! I made the puff happen!! I couldn't even listen to Mike for like half a lap because I was ecstatic that I felt how to make the puff.
Now, how to describe it in words? It's above my head right now. It's all about pushing and holding together, but beyond that, it was just a feeling. And wow. There's our baby step towards being able to create that lift in the shoulders. Wow.
So then we did some trot lengthening, and I was right that Willig doesn't do it consistently. When he is really lengthening, there's that "skip" feeling at the end of the stride, and the skip throws me up out of the saddle. And Mike said we're past that - last year I flopped and flailed around, but this year, I know better, so when it gets big, sink my heels, drop my legs, and stay steady contact. Think about how I corrected it last year, and correct it here too. Don't let Willig go all crazy and lose all connection. Just ride the damn thing.
So the big take aways are the same message as always: work on prompt, responsiveness to the aids (like with the leg yield, I'm losing four steps getting him ready to go); prepare ahead of time for the next movement; and demand excellence from myself and Willig.
It was another GREAT lesson. We are definitely in territory that is new to me, so it's a little harder for me to retain it and translate it, even just a few hours later, but it is so fun to be learning so much and making so much progress. I had been sure after how far we've come since last year that there'd be a big long plateau, but this is just one cool thing after another.

The grass is growing!

2011-06-05T21:06:00.000-07:00

Friday I jumped Willig by myself - well, we went over a fence multiple times - each time with its own style of ugly - but I'm counting it because ... my position was solid and although I was irritated with what a moron Willig was being (I think he was mad because my car was parked under a tree instead of in the parking lot, so the dogs wouldn't overheat) I felt like I had the lower leg and the tools to ride it. I couldn't ride the course I wanted, but I didn't go off.
So today he started out almost as goofy - he decided he was scared of the Gator, which was parked nearby. I thought the whole lesson was going to be a write-off (or at least, one of those "wonderful" lessons where I acquire another tool in my tool box for when he's being a moron - those are great, but actually jumping and feeling confident is more fun).
Instead, Shannon helped us pull it together - way better than I did on my own, and we ended up with a few take-aways:
1. Ride him. Ride him. Ride him. Stop being a passenger and ride him.
This was the main message of the lesson. We started over a little cross-rail - no big deal. Half halt on the way there, and then let him go the last couple strides. Sit up and heels forward and don't jump ahead.
We went from the cross rail straight to a course. To be a show off, I cantered it. Shannon said "great job, but next time canter it faster - you got five strides in the four stride". So there's the "push it a little further" for you.
Then we did a second, longer, harder course. Shannon moved blocks around, set a couple fences higher, hung her jacket in a terrifying place, and added ... the wall. She said if we did it perfect, we would only have to do it once.
And so we did it with one fault (the rail on top of the lattice).
Here's what was interesting:
- It's hard to ride him faster. It's hard enough to canter him, let alone push him forward. (i.e. I am really a chicken.)
- He tried to dart left at the wall, but I was half-expecting it, so my left leg - praise it! - actually wiggled a little on his side, and probably thanks to all J's riding - he went back to the right and we went over the wall. I made a correction! Without Shannon yelling it ahead of time!
- Shannon made us jump it a second time. And I realized, as I circled back around, that I was out of breath. Which was ... the only time I was out of breath on the course! The 2'9" oxer at the end of the combination didn't scare me. The barrels toward the poodle didn't scare me. The jacket hanging on the standard didn't scare me. The horrible flower boxes (they must look like a black hole to him or something) didn't scare me. Only the wall did. That's what I meant by the grass is growing. What huge progress from even just a few months ago, but definitely a year ago.
- It isn't that big. It's a mental thing because it looks solid. It was smaller than some of our other fences, and as we went over it, I thought "oh, this is nothing."
2. Ride him into the outside rein.
When he's being a doofus, I like to jerk on his mouth. Shannon said kick instead. If he tries to dart off, yes of course use the rein, but just try my legs first.
3. Make him respect me more than whatever he's being scared of.
Again with the Gator (although I think it applied to the fences after we worked so hard on going past the Gator), he needs to worry more about what I'm asking him to do and asking him to do next, than look for things to be scared of. Even if they're "legitimately" scary. (Nothing was, but in theory it could be.)
I think this is what J is doing when he is being a jerk, although she's too polite to ever call him a jerk. Or she actually rides, so his jerk-ness barely registers to her.
4. Did I mention the riding him part?
If I ride every fence, every stride, he holds his act together. It takes an enormous amount of concentration and focus, but the second time we came to the wall, I actually looked at it and thought "I can do this". I haven't felt that way on Willig in a long time. I'm super excited.

Good Book

2011-06-04T18:15:00.000-07:00

I'm reading "how good riders get good" by Denny Emerson and finding it very apropros.

Here's a quote quoted in the book:
"Nothing in the world can take the palce of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost always a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan, 'press on' has solved, and always will solve, the problems of the human race." And riding. - President Calvin Coolidge

Here's some other gems from it:
Gina Miles says her latest philosophy is "I plan to be a better rider in five years than I am now."

The Plateau Concept
Just because you can't see grass growing doesn't mean it isn't. "[P]rogress is so slow and imperceptible that we are too close to see it on a day-to-day basis, often leading to the misconception that there isn't any progress."

Jane Savoie's "Flea Jar Factor"
Fleas learn the height of their jar and jump so their heads don't hit the top. Make sure that your fences build self-confidence, scare yourself a little, but not too much. Jump at home so that your "flea jar height" at a show seems so much shorter.

Performance Anxiety
"The euphoria I experienced on successful completion was directly proportional to the fear I experienced beforehand."
"The credit belongs to the man who ... if he wins, knows the thrill of high achievement, and if he fails, at least fails daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat." - Theodore Roosevelt

Jekyll Willig, Grinning Martha

2011-05-30T19:15:00.000-07:00

Driving to my lesson today, I had the usual sense of dread, and I realized why. With my jump lessons, I never know whether Willig is going to have a Jekyll day or a Hyde day. I HATE the Hyde days, although I'm always grateful that he's having one with Shannon there, because she always gives me some tips on how to deal with them (and now, for example, compared to last year, I can ride through most of his "bad" days - not his terrible days, but those are (knock on leather) few and far between), so that when I get one and I'm alone, I'm not totally at loose ends.
He had a kind of wild hair week - he bolted with J on Tuesday because he saw Bambi come out of the woods (from a walk - and she had already seen the deer, so she was prepared); on Thursday, as I already described, he had a fit about the spurs with Mike; on Saturday, where Bambi had been on Tuesday - horrors - a human was walking, so he got a bolty butt with me, and got to go work hills as his punishment; and so I didn't have the highest hopes for a good attitude today.
Well, lo and behold, he was in an excellent, easy going mood.
The main take aways were to:
1) Ride him straight to the center of the jump. He's going over the left side a lot, and then veering left on the far side. This must be me, but I don't know what I'm doing.
2) It's ok to give him a couple half halts a few strides out, but a couple strides out, relax and just ride the fence. Stop controlling and let him figure it out himself. Especially on an exercise fence, where there's ground poles and we're doing it repetitively.
We started with a cross rail on what I thought was a tight right turn, but was actually a very easy and doable right turn (see how easy your eyes - well my eyes at least - can deceive?). Shannon turned it into a vertical. Ho-hum.
Then we added a little combination - cross rail to vertical, around the blue barrels to the 4-stridish two verticals. Ho-hum. A little more "rushing" (not really, just feels like it to me) but no big thang.
Then the little combination turned into a vertical to vertical, and the 4-stridish got taller and then the lattice fence. "Yawn" says Willig.
The 4-stridish turned into an oxer and added the blue barrels. "Could you challenge me?" Willig says. (And I had a great moment here where I realized we were coming in too far on the left and several sides out tried to correct it. I wasn't successful, but at least I noticed, which is an improvement.)
The vertical before the oxer got taller, as did the lattice. Willig came in a bit short on the oxer and a bit long on the lattice, but he ... (drum roll) jumped them anyway - fixing himself - a bit awkward, but we went over fine.
And here was the shining moment - the first time over the oxer (which was 2'9" - I sheepishly snuck out and measured it afterwards) - holy floating, batman. When Willig jumps - when he actually has to lift himself a tiny bit into the air and create a bit of a bascule (right?) instead of just plodding over the "safe" 2' fences - oh my lord is he a pleasure to ride. It's these fences why I put up with the dread and the nerves that we're going to have a Hyde jumping day. It's like magic.
It's like - for those few seconds - that's when I feel present. Like a meditation style present. The same as when we've finally got everything together in dressage and he elevates his forehand. The same as when I used to rock climb. It's that moment of balance with the universe that is so incredible that it makes all the time and work and money and sweat and tears worth it - for those few seconds. And of course, the goal that all this work means that those seconds are going to come more often and last longer and that I'll have more ability to summon them. And hopefully until I'm 61, like the person riding at Rolex this year (!!).
And also, honestly, it makes me feel better that he pulls hijinks with better riders than me too. They may deal with it better than I do (they definitely do), but it's not because I totally suck that he tries to pull that stuff on me. He's just a horse.
On the drive, anyway, I remembered that was what John Camlin described about Willig when he was there for training. Some days, he was just a delight. Other days, he got up on the wrong side of the stall. And you couldn't predict and you couldn't change it - you just got whatever horse he was that day. That's just Willig. And I just have to cross my fingers that a show day is a Jekyll day and ride the best I can on a Hyde day.

Football = Riding?

2011-05-30T08:13:00.000-07:00

A quote by Chuck Klosterman - he's writing about football, but I think it applies to any sport.
Riding "allows the intellectual part of my brain to evolve, but it allows the emotional part to remain unchanged. It has a liberal cerebellum and a reactionary heart. And this is all I want from everything, all the time, always."

Sleepy, yet naughty Willig

2011-05-26T20:39:00.000-07:00

I asked today to work on some of the 1-3 movements. Although I can do them, I'm not sure I'm doing them the "correct" way - that a judge wants to see. In particular, the canter-trot-canter transition at X, the two 10 meter circles at X, and our straightness. I also wanted to review the walk-canter-halt work we started last lesson, because it has gotten really ... flailing as I've been working on it on my own.
So we started with just a 20 meter trot circle (thinking overflexed neck and then flexing him alternately left and right) with a lot of focus on the responsive transitions. And as we moved to canter, Willig decided he no longer knew how to pick up his right lead. So I got frustrated, and started collapsing in over my right hip, which would shove his hindquarters in (to the right) so he'd have to shove even harder out (to the left) and then would pick up the left lead. This got hilarious. In the sense that after riding for 20 years we couldn't successfully pick up the right lead canter is hilarious.
So after struggling with that, Mike switched us to some other work - doing the walk "pirouette" (feeling his hind leg crossing underneath) and then trotting, then a few steps of trot or walk and then back and just keeping him really, really focused.
Willig was, remarkably, lazy. He wasn't paying any attention to Prince, who was having a blast on the lunge line, Jessica riding, or me.
The other thing we focused on was me sitting up straight and tall - just like my trot position, and not to fold up and lean in when asking for the canter.
And to smack him with the whip when he ignores me. I'm very, very, painfully slow on this.
So then we did a bit of the 10 meter circles - all that stuff on the regular ground just makes him flexible and responsive and collected on his hindquarters, so this isn't as big a deal.
Then the left leg yield coming out of the 10 meter circle to the right - Mike said think "shoulder in" for a stride along the center line before starting the leg yield. While I got it in theory, I couldn't get Willig to stop trailing his hindquarters.
And of course, the walk-canter-halt work helps with the canter-trot-canter transition.
So Mike went and got his boots on, and came out and rode Willig for less than 10 minutes. Willig gave him a bit of a hassle at first (Mike said because of the spurs) but then settled down and just looked gorgeous.
When Mike got off, he said to work on keeping my left hand steady and kind of lifting my right hand - he thinks that I am probably squeezing with my right leg all the time, and also leaning on my right hip.
So I got back on, and holy cow - Willig was like a different horse. He felt puffed up in the shoulders - like someone had put a balloon between his front legs - and he was so sensitive. It was like I've been riding a horse with two dials (direction and speed) and after Mike got off, he had like 50. It was like switching from driving a beetle bug (two buttons) to a space shuttle (200 buttons). It was kind of overwhelming.
To wrap up the lesson, Mike was trying to get me to feel the straightness, and to get my body position better (turns out, I am riding around on the right lead with my left leg forward and my right leg back!), but mostly I was just "oooo, space ship".
I have NO idea how he does that with only 10 minutes on Willig. I wish I'd win the lottery so he could ride every day and I could take a lesson every day. Holy cow.
Like, he likes to talk about peeling the onion - we started with my heels down, and are gradually working into more and more detail. It's just that I thought the onion was like - I don't know - 10 layers. And today I realized it is at least 100 - maybe 1000.
So, unfortunately because we're working at the frontiers of my understanding, a lot of what happens in the lesson makes sense at the time (barely) but it doesn't stick enough on the first try that I can get it blogged properly. It's cool to be learning so much, but I wish I was a bit more natural at absorbing it.

EHV-1 in Washington

2011-05-19T08:13:00.001-07:00

http://www.veterinarypracticenews.com/vet-breaking-news/2011/05/17/washington-state-veterinarian-cautions-horse-owners-about-ehv1-outbreak.aspx
A Washington horse that attended the National Cutting Horse Association event in Ogden, Utah from April 30 to May 8, tested positive for Equine Herpes Virus 1 (EHV-1), a highly contagious animal disease. Several confirmed cases in horses with severe symptoms have been diagnosed in Utah, Colorado and elsewhere.

Symptoms in horses include fever, sneezing, excessive salivation and other mild symptoms. Serious cases of the disease are rare, but can include staggering, hind-end paralysis and even death. The disease is not contagious to humans.

“While I have not yet placed any restrictions on the movement of animals, I strongly suggest that horse owners isolate animals that attended the Western National Championships in Ogden, Utah,” says Leonard Eldridge, DVM, Washington state veterinarian. “For the protection of other horses, these owners are advised to keep their animals home for a couple of weeks.”

The disease is spread from horse to horse through direct contact, on feed, tack and equipment or on the clothes and hands of horse owners. Considering the possibility of disease spread, owners are advised to carefully wash their hands and equipment to prevent the spread of the virus.

The time of exposure to illness of EHV-1 is typically two to 14 days. Horse owners attending the Ogden show should consider limiting the movement of their horses and isolate them from other horses to prevent further spread of the virus.

The EHV-1 positive horse that attended the Ogden show was treated at the Washington State University (WSU) veterinary teaching hospital in Pullman and was confirmed over the weekend. Blood samples from several other Washington horses that attended the Utah event are currently being tested at WSU’s Washington Animal Disease Diagnostic Laboratory.

Horses that show symptoms of EHV-1 should be seen by a veterinarian. Positive cases of EHV-1 must be reported to the State Veterinarian’s Office at (360) 902-1881.

2nd level canter transition work

2011-05-13T19:18:00.001-07:00

Willig was having a high-spirited start, and I told Mike he might finally get the chance to really see Willig act up, since we spent 30 minutes warming up going past the "scary" blocks that have been out for over a week. No - Willig just made me show that what I'm doing (actually riding him) has been right, with just a little fine tuning to improve it.
Mike also pointed out that it's easier with another person on the ground, the other set of eyes who can see things differently than being the rider, and that even his younger horse will go past the blocks 20 times and then spook at them the 21st. All of which made me feel better - it's not just tiny brained Willig.
The high-spirited start came from a really soggy day of rain; it really makes a difference when he doesn't move around in his turn-out, because for once in the past two months, he'd actually been ridden for a couple days leading up to the lesson.
Anyway, so we worked on those "control" rides - which are the leg yield, circles, sitting plugged in, distracting him, asking him to bend his neck and give (he started out like riding a plank with a 100 pound weight on the end - even my wrist muscles were getting sore), and shoulder-in past the scary places. Mike suggested it as he can look with one eye, but not with both, which helped me know how much looking was ok.
For warm up, Mike suggested thinking overbent and overflexed, and then praising and releasing when he gave to me.
Then we worked on the one loop serpentine, and the responsiveness to the aids - when I ask for canter, he needs to be ready to leap into canter. And then from there, we ended with working on the 2nd level movement for simple change. A simple change is NOT from canter to trot back to canter on the other lead, but canter to walk to canter.
So we did a few walk-trot-walk transitions to get him responsive. Then I'd ask for the canter with a bit of a pop up. Like popping a wheelie. And a few times, albeit a bit ugly and ungainly, he'd "pop" and he'd kind of jump his shoulders up into the canter. We'd go just a few strides (like starting to do pull-ups Mike said - you don't do 30 the first time) and then think "halt" back down. I thought Willig did great, and Mike said to add this in to our work, just making sure to do a few strides only as he builds up to it.
It was a really satisfying lesson when I look back at a year ago, when I couldn't even ride him at the far end because he'd act up, and now I get irritated when he doesn't warm up perfectly at the far end when it's been raining and there's scary blocks.
And Mike pointed out that really, ideally if you were competing to win, you'd school 3rd level and show training level, and then you'd get 70s in training level.
I'm just happy that I'm able to ride Willig now, even with a bit of a hot start, and not need to lunge and I just kind of clench my jaw a bit and focus, and then he's just grateful I'm telling him what's what.

Canter just keeps getting better

2011-04-30T20:53:00.000-07:00

Against all odds.
This week I had a lesson with Mike, and it was a really great one. It was one of those ones that was just jammed full of interesting stuff - way too much for me to be able to write it all down afterwards - but a few easy homework assignments:
- When Willig dives down from the canter to the trot (without me asking, or hell, even when I ask but I don't ask for a dive onto the forehand), sit back, sit up, plug my seat bones into the saddle, and ask him to trot up into my hand.
- Before the canter transitions, do some "half-steps" and then walk (half-steps = think piaffe) - just a few steps of each, just to get him listening and also I think he rocks back a bit on his hindquarters with these.
- Don't accept less than what he can do.
- For the 1st level canter serpentine - I had the geometry wrong in my head. You don't leg yield over and back, it's just two diaganol lines. You point his head from K to X, and then when you get to X, you swing his hindquarters around (counter-clockwise in this example) and then his head is pointing at H and you just ride another straight line to H. I've been making this way more complicated than it needs to be.
- The funny little "hop" Willig does sometimes when I whip him while we're cantering is his preparation for a flying lead change. That snot-nose DOES know more than he's letting onto.
- We worked on ... I forget the name, but the shoulder-in and then when you turn his neck the opposite way (travers?). So now we can do shoulder-in, haunches-in, and travers. I think we just need to learn renvers.
- Willig did more excellent canter work and excellent leg yielding. This is not due to anything I am doing on purpose, which is kind of frustrating. It's wonderful and fun, but I wish I knew what I was doing differently to be making these things stick.
It was a great lesson! I am so excited about how much we're learning, although I have a tsunami wave of work heading at me, and I am just trying to figure out how I can keep some semblance of riding and the rest of my life together with the limited hours there are in a week.

Peteton - first dressage show of the season

2011-04-17T17:39:00.000-07:00

This was a mixed bag. Like the FPEC jumper benefit, I was overall pleased, but at the same time disappointed*. (*Because I am a perfectionist.)
First, the weather was schizophrenic. Sun shining, gorgeous, then dumping rain 10 seconds later. While I love Washington summer, and can't wait for it to get here, this is the time of year I start getting frustrated. It doesn't help when I fail to get away during the dead of winter to somewhere sunny.
Second, Willig was a nut. He was rearing tied to the trailer, then I lunged him and he was leaping around the mounds with a crazy eye, and then I put him back on the trailer and he tried to roll, and basically he tried to dig a hole to China at his spot. Al was on the other side of the trailer and there were like two hoof marks. Willig's side of the trailer looks like someone was plowing to get ready to plant corn for the village for the year.
Third, I had the dogs in the truck, and while they were good and quiet, I was feeling guilty, and also anxious about the temperature (too hot, too cold, too wet).
So because Willig had his crazy eye, I got on him about an hour before my first ride. Fortunately, Shannon was just wrapping up working with Kerry, so she gave me a hard 15 minutes of warm up, which pretty much settled Willig down. Then we walked for about half an hour (at which point he got the "hops" and we had to side pass all the way down the long side because he wanted to be a moron - not showing off if anyone who was there watching is reading this - trying to avoid some bucking/bolting action). And then warmed up.
Now, two things were different. The test was inside, in a small arena, which I had NOT practiced the tests in.
And then, I haven't ridden the tests in about two months - usually I ride them way more than anyone would recommend, so that I have them memorized kinesthetically and can think about other things than the next movement during the test, like riding.
So this was a double whammy because the arena was small, the next movement came up fast, and I was already struggling to make sure I remembered the test.
What was satisfying:
- After Willig settled down, especially after the first ride, he was actually quite nice - much nicer than he's been since pretty much mid-March, when I quit being able to ride so much.
- And most of the low scores were expected: the small arena (it is really hard to lengthen him and collect him up when it only takes him like three strides to do the long side; similarly, it's hard to not lead with the shoulder when you're coming off a 10 meter circle at R and only leg yielding from X to K), and then his lack of bend and "quick" responsiveness are just me not riding him enough.
He got 3rd for 1-1, a decent sized class and just like .1 away from 2nd, and then sort of 2nd for 1-2, but she was scoring 1-3 with 1-2, and I didn't wait to see how the full thing broke out.
The scoring was on the hard side, but he got 58.276 for 1-1 and 57.838 for 1-2.
I'll probably just do 1-2 and 1-3 the rest of the season (I don't think I can remember three tests) and my ambitious goal is 2-1 for the informal stuff at the end of the season and to start working on a level 1 freestyle.
It was also good to have Shannon there because she holds us to the higher, consistent standard (see previous post on Mike's lesson), and then she always has really good suggestions, like: she pointed out that we weren't using the corners as much as we could (and thus, losing easily four strides on every lap around the arena), pointed out what I could do to make better use of my warm up (I get lazy), and also pointed out that once I enter the arena, I similarly shouldn't dawdle around in there, but make the most of my 1-2 minutes before my test starts. The best tip was not to ride him around all held up and squished at the sitting trot, but to let him relax, stretch out his back and topline, and post while I'm waiting to start the test. It was one of those "duh, why didn't that ever occur to me" and I'm so glad she said it.
Also, it was great to be there with Shannon there and with a friend. It makes such a huge difference in the day to be able to share it with someone.
So for Willig to start out on the wild side, I was very satisfied with how he performed during the tests. Reflecting back, a year ago I probably couldn't have even ridden him in one of those moods, and this time, I tried to channel that injury into "sparkle". And I'm not scared of it as much, more irritated, and it makes me ride him better (and then he's grateful for the clear direction).
I also rode the whole test at the sitting trot. Mike had suggested that I post, since my back is back to locked up (my fault for not working on it enough), but then it was easier to ride the small arena sitting because it made me keep him packaged so that we wouldn't overshoot a movement. And I did it! A year ago I could barely sit the trot - and I sat it like I was a tin man with only three joints - and now I can do it! This continues, with my lower leg, to be the thing I'm most proud of.

When Mike takes it up a notch, we both get sore

2011-04-17T17:29:00.000-07:00

We had a couple weeks off from lessons because Mike was showing in southern California, and the timing worked out "well" because they were two terrible weeks for me with almost no riding. (In theory, that would be good timing, in practice, I ride more regularly and show up for my lessons if I have them, no matter how busy or terrible I think my week is going. So I've taught myself that I need to have at least a lesson every other week - I try to do Shannon even weeks and Mike odd weeks so that I actually end up with a lesson every week.)
So we didn't get to work on most of what he had us doing the last lesson, and then the first informal show was coming up fast (next post) and I hadn't even ridden test 1-1 or 1-2 in a couple of months.
While Mike had us do some of the 1-2 movements, and gave me feedback on how to improve those, what he really did was start holding us to a higher standard. Now, as the title says, when Mike decides to hold us to a higher standard, my abs get sore, and Willig seemed to be a bit sore the next day too) (although not two days later, for the show, when he had a crazy eye).
This is really hard to ride, because I have to think about what feels like everything every second, and here we go back to riding with Bob ... if I would quit trying to control it (i.e. think about everything every second) and just ride it, for god's sake, I could be present and in the zone instead of a freaking control freak.
That being said, it gets amazing results.
So some of the things I'm now thinking about (the next layer of the onion):
- No more puttering around! When I ask for something, Willig better respond. No beating on him with my legs, no clucking, no whip-whip-whipping. I ask; he gives.
- No more lollygagging. We were weaving in and out, couldn't hold the 20 meter circle to save our lives, his head was tossing or grubbing, and Mike is just like "are you ASKING him for that or is he just doing it because he feels like it?" (Hint: I am not asking him to grub while he weaves like a drunken sailor on and off the rail.) I'm the rider, and I need to be the boss.
- Work on my sitting trot. I haven't been working on it, and I'm locking my back up again, so I need to go back to work without stirrups. Mike kindly (praise the lord!) said we weren't doing it during the lesson, and that's good because it wasn't just my abs that were sore the next day, even without being without stirrups.
What does this all boil down to? Consistency.
- Then taking his movements up a bit. When I ask for a canter, no lifting his head, no falling on his forehand, no rushing, no hurrying, no waiting 3 strides before doing it.
- And similarly, asking for him to be on the bit - no head up in the air, no grubbing. A nice "waterfall" neck.
- And also, asking him to bend to the inside. He's not physically deformed. Do it, Willig, do it.
- Then asking him to actually move. Impulsion.
- And then asking him to stretch down on that stretchy circle. The half-ass "stretch" isn't good enough anymore.
So I loved it. I love that Mike is making it harder and not letting us just get away with a plateau, and I love that he's able to ask for harder, explain, patiently ask again, and then not gloat when I grin with pleasure when we catch on.
He said we're approaching the next level of stuff, and that we can do it (renvers, travers, flying changes) and at "flying changes" I started laughing, and he pointed out that last year I never would have believed I'd be where I am right now. And he's right.
I'm super excited. I love these lessons because they make me want to work harder in between so we can go even further the next lesson. It's just my damn job and rest of my life, all those hours I'm not riding ...

Another rainbow at FPEC

2011-04-11T18:48:00.000-07:00

Road to Kentucky Benefit Show

2011-04-09T21:39:00.001-07:00

Today was the Forest Park hosted benefit show for J and her fellow pony clubber to raise funds for their super exciting trip to Kentucky later this year.
Willig was a half-ass rock star. Some of the jumps were a bit more than we're used to (ok, a lot more, like the one that was two trees), and without Shannon, I probably would have chickened out and made more excuses not to ride (I've had the shittiest shit week, which means Willig only got ridden once, by J, during the week) and just watched and then went off and did other things. Instead, I was Shannon's shadow for the first couple hours, which gave me the confidence I needed to finish off on my own.
Here's how I tackled it:
- Lunged. He bucked. A lot. But I kept him working until he cut it out and then went just a little bit longer. He also fell down in one of his tantrums.
- Led and Looked. From the ground. I spent a while (a boring while) doing this. Instead of walking the course by myself (all 14 (!) fences - I'm getting too old for this!), we led him and Holly. He was a cool cucumber, which usually means he's bottling his fear up for once I'm on him and the monsters no longer have me on the ground as the tasty treat (while he makes a getaway).
- Lollygagged. (Just to make another "l" word.) We "schooled" the ground pole course together, at the walk, then at the trot. This took forever, but was very, very reassuring to me. It was also, quite possibly, my lowest point as a jumper, so it was very nice to share that moment with Shannon. You pretty much can't do anything less than this and still be "jumping". I guess you could carry the horse yourself.
- More lollygagging. Then we stood around in the warm up arena for a while, just so he got used to the activity.
- Cross-rails. We just tackled these like with the last lesson - ride every step. He was a little more nervous about it trotting (it's easier for him to shoot out sideways) and the long lines, when he could see several fences in a row, made him want to rush. So we walked the last long line. He just stepped over each cross-rail. Ironically, we placed 1st. The time they wanted you to aim for must have been "tortoise".
- 2'. This was easy breezy. It was fun. He knew what to expect, I knew what to expect, but I rode every step with a death grip on my hands. I could hardly flex them when we finished.
- 2'3". Then my confidence tubed, because they put flowers and flags and cones and brush under every stinkin' fence. Since Mr. W has problems with a single cone, I was pretty sure the good afternoon was about to be shot. But I gritted my teeth, clamped onto those reins, and ... we did it! Hooray for us! Except for one refusal (the combination "rainbow") where he did a classic Willig run out abruptly to the right, which I did NOT feel coming at all. But thanks to how he's been teaching me with numerous examples of what to do and what not to do, I yanked him hard to the right, which was ... right into fence #6, which surprised both of us, so he ... jumped it. And then I was still yanking right, so we ended up making this tiny 10 meter circle with a jump at 3:00, and then at 12:00 went over the fence he refused the first time. I could hear the spectators laughing. They said it looked like it was on purpose (it wasn't).
So I'm really super pleased with how he did. A week off. A change in his own home. A LOT of stuff to look at and going on. And just one refusal, and we rode it. Good job, Willig!
Now if only every show let you have that kind of build up ... and was conveniently located at home.
This day was definitely the high point of my week. And they did a great job organizing and running it, with their creative and fun course. And they had a good turn out, so I hope they raised some good money for their trip.

This cow looks like she could kick W's ass

2011-04-09T21:37:00.000-07:00

Horse dreams dashed, German teen turns to cow Luna
When Regina Mayer's parents dashed her hopes of getting a horse, the resourceful 15-year-old didn't sit in her room and sulk. Instead, she turned to a cow called Luna to make her riding dreams come true.

http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/nationworld/2014686063_apeugermanyjumpingcow.html

Oh! That's what "ride every step" means!

2011-04-04T07:22:00.000-07:00

For the last several months, during both of my lessons, I have heard the words, but have felt kind of cloudy. I try to do what Mike or Shannon are saying, but it doesn't seem to make total sense (or I feel like I'm already doing it) or have much effect. But the last couple of lessons with each of them, it's like each lesson a major light bulb has gone off, and slightly embarrassingly, over really mundane stuff.
In yesterday's lesson with Shannon, after the last lesson's break through on keeping the contact, she was telling me to quit moving my left hand so much. I was pretty sure I wasn't moving my hand, but then suddenly, I felt it. Every step, I give just a bit. And then take it back. And so if I focused on that and planted my hand in place, Willig could relax. And like Shannon said, he's actually nice in the sense that he's obvious about when I'm doing it right, so I get rewarded for riding properly by almost immediately feeling the improvement.
I haven't been riding much or hard (still moving and getting the house ready for sale), so he's been a bit of a handful. He's harder to bend, less responsive to the aids, and gets skittish. But that made for a great "learning opportunity" on how to ride that during the lesson, and once again, Shannon didn't disappoint.
The two positive signs were that when I'm riding on my normal schedule, I'm actually making my life easier - i.e. he's overall more fun and enjoyable to ride (kind of a surprise, because I've assumed all my habits are so bad that I just make them worse between lessons). And second is that I CAN ride him when he's being skittish and has low responsiveness - I have acquired the skills and tools!
The big break through on the flat was that moving left hand and needing to think about "planting" it.
Then we went outside to jump. I asked for it, purely because I 100% didn't want to do it. We haven't been riding much outside, I certainly haven't jumped him outside, and I haven't jumped him at all on my own since my last lesson.
And so Shannon sent us right to the far end (the scary end), put us on a trot, then canter circle, and right over this 2' vertical. And she said (second breakthrough): pretend like this is the show and this is your only chance.
So even though he wanted to look and be a bit silly, I rode. every. step. And while it made me tired, he responded beautifully. On the second or third lap, the poodle came out, and when Willig didn't react, he started barking! And nothing from Willig! Just an ear flick. Because I was riding every single one of those steps.
He had a period where he tensed up his shoulders and got ready to bolt (when we changed directions) but I could feel it coming (because I was paying such careful attention) and so we skipped the jump for a few laps, but then he was like "oh, ok, we're not doing that today?"
So instead of dawdling around out there for 40 minutes, trying to work up the nerve to head towards that end, Shannon just sent us straight out there and created yet another breakthrough moment.
Now, Willig is Willig, but this was huge for me and how I'm thinking about things. I'm still very much a passenger-rider, and I need to become the driver-rider.
But wow. I can do it! I just need to keep changing those old bad habits.

Great canter!

2011-03-24T20:17:00.000-07:00

We've been moving, so not only have I been exhausted and not riding much, but my back has gotten every muscle in it sore. So I wasn't expecting much from my dressage lesson this week, although maybe that's the secret to a great ride.
Willig has been really great each time I've ridden him - he's just so grateful I showed up, groomed him, and he got 30 minutes of exercise, and he started the lesson out the same - low level hijink at the scary end.
We worked on leg yield, and when it was dragging a bit, shoulder in using the wall, which improved it quite a bit, and then turning down the center line, leg yield, then switching to shoulder in.
Then we did some travers (?) which is almost the same as shoulder in, except his neck bends the "other" direction. Tiny difference, but feels hugely different to ask for and maintain (just because it's new).
Willig had just a couple of short circuit moments, and Mike had us ride small circles at the trot.
He also pointed out the same thing as Shannon - why don't I use my whip? He watched me ask for an aid, Willig would hear me, and decide not to do it, and then I wouldn't whip him. Over and over and over again. But when Mike said "whip him" and I'd give him a smack, he'd go right back to obedient, quick, responsive Willig. So I'm still lacking in the assertive department, which is just soooo weird since I'm not really a very passive person (I don't think).
Then we did some canter work, and Willig did this just spectacular, mind blowing canter that was not on the forehand, not rushed, even tempo, just amazing. Mike was like "wow - what have you been doing?" and I was like "well, not riding and my back hurts - exactly the wrong things!"
I thought it was a fluke, but he did it again, and then again the other direction (although not as well, I think he was getting tired).
So the take aways were:
Work a bit on the travers - the feeling of his hind leg crossing underneath him - ride it off a circle and make a circle, and feel where that outside hind leg is.
Keep working on the canter.
Work on sitting trot without stirrups to continue to improve that.
Work on quick, consistent, obedient, responsive aids. A smack with the whip if he knows what I'm asking for and doesn't do it.
There was a LOT more - it was another chock full of lessons lesson, but I couldn't get to the computer for a couple days, and it was also so much cool, new stuff that it made sense while I was riding it, but I was thinking at the time "I'm never going to remember all this!"
It was a great lesson. Way to go Willig!
And he was good for J jumping him this week (outside)! and the hives are almost gone again. Mystery hives.

Super satisfying lesson!

2011-03-12T11:59:00.000-08:00

I told Shannon I was ready to take it up a notch from our last lesson (ground poles) and suggested some of the raised poles (i.e. 2" off the ground).
We started out on warm up, and Shannon, after patiently repeating herself about a hundred times, finally got through to me on a very, very important point: HANDS STAY STILL.
So one of the life habits that needs to be corrected is that I steer with the reins, and with the inside one when I'm turning to the inside. We touched on this many, many lessons ago, but I've had so many other things to work on that we haven't gotten back to it.
So Willig was being a bit of a goof (raising his head in the air, moving his shoulder to the inside) going past the scary end, so Shannon said "keep your contact steady, your hands still, and move him with your inside leg into your outside rein to keep him from running in". Sound simple enough, but when he'd raise his head, I'd squeeze (and cross over!) with the inside hand, and then my hands would go uneven and then his head would raise higher.
So finally, she told me to think that my hands were side reins, and they DON'T MOVE, and to ride him with my leg, and I thought "Shannon is full of it, but just to prove she's wrong, and because the way I've been doing it for the past 3 years isn't working, I'll just show her that if I do it her way, he bolts".
And you can see this coming ... I did it her way, and lo and behold, his head stayed in frame, he didn't bulge, and we just went smooth as could be past the scary end.
And it wasn't a one time freak coincidence. When I'm not wiggling all around with my hands, he doesn't have to squirm all around with his head.
Now, that would have been enough for me to call the whole month a roaring success, but noooo ... Shannon had to push us a bit.
So she set up a little cross rail with two ground poles, and we jumped it from the trot - with the door open! eek! - and then at a canter and then trotting from the other side, and then cantering from the other side. And Shannon had to remind me to keep my heels down and to come in defensively (butt in the saddle, not perched forward on the saddle) and to let him jump, not stand up in the stirrups, and the first couple times I had to cluck and ride him my teeny tiny wimpy way forward, but then he was like "ho-hum". He hasn't jumped in probably a month, and that's his response: "ho-hum".
So she turned it to a vertical: "ho-hum".
Then she set up a regular standard that had a long straight away back towards the barn (you came off a circle, but then he had lots of room to bolt or buck), and then raised it and raised it and raised it. He came towards that a little more forward than the "short-side" fence, but not a moment of hesitation - he jumped a bit long, a bit short, and a bit just right (not in that order) and each time after the fence, while I got myself back together, Shannon moved it up another hole.
She said that it's me who's getting nervous, as I come around the circle and see it's higher, I'm the one who's tensing up and holding him back, and that I have to forget that he used to bolt and buck, and ride him like he's going to be good, but prepared for if he's not.
It was great. I was just all smiles afterwards.
So everything is coming together. I'll see how the next lesson goes, but maybe we can put a couple derbies back on the calendar. And - note to self - ask Shannon for jumping homework after that lesson.
And it is - all this stuff ties together - I don't want to overthink it, but maybe he's nervous because I rode him poorly for the couple years before I got to Mike and Shannon, and so maybe now we can correct that (and I'll become a better rider!).

My new goal: collection

2011-03-10T20:11:00.000-08:00

Today was windy, and I was gone for an extended weekend, and although J rode Willig for me every other day, I only got to ride him Wednesday night before my lesson. And it was a busy evening in the arena, which threw us off a bit.
So I was a little anxious that it would be a lesson where we regressed again, but it ended up being one that was just the right amount of "stretch" into new territory, while feeling progress in the stuff we've been working on.
We began with the failure to bend to the left, and Mike pointed out that when I am asking for that bend, I tend to move my hand up and over (the dreaded crossing of the neck) instead of down and out (towards my knee). Also, I tend to pull with my right hand whenever I pull with my left (which I don't think happens the other way), so poor Willig has essentially been asked to go even more to the right when I'm trying to bend him to the left. Although this is quite obviously an ingrained habit, as soon as Mike pointed it out and I corrected it, the left bend problem pretty much went away (although I do need to remind myself to also use my leg).
We could have stopped right there and I would have been satisfied with the leap in progress, but no, that was just the first 5 minutes.
Then we worked on going past the scary side using shoulder-in. This also worked amazingly well (when I remembered to do inside hand down towards my knee instead of up over his neck) and especially when I remembered to use my inside leg to push him. It also helps, tremendously in a way I am trying to look at optimistically, that J was riding him inside because of the weather, because she doesn't put up with his bullshit at the far end, and just rides him past it like it's no big deal. So he was kind of a little bit over it until he remembered it was me, his timid mom, and was like "oh! Maybe I should be nervous again!" and then didn't get the firm, reliable corrections that J presumably gives without even thinking about it. (The optimistic side of me is that maybe one day, like breathing, I'll also give those corrections. The negative (and more dominant) side of me thinks, "If I haven't figured that out yet, I might as well get a sweet 15 hand Morgan and just putter around.")
Then Mike worked us through the movements in each of the 1 tests, because the dressage arena was set up. Note to self: I have not been using the inside row of lights as strictly as I should, because the big dressage arena feels small and cramped compared to what I've been doing on my own.
We worked on the center line a bit (straightness) which comes more through impulsion. Another eureka moment. He starts zigging and zagging when we're going slow. Although Mike also says to go ahead and slow down and walk a couple steps then stop with his nose on X. Don't wait and screech to a halt and skid past X.
We did some of the 10 meter half circles, practicing getting straight on the center line and then doing the next 10 meter half circle, to avoid making two angled lines instead of a half circle.
Also, we can improve our stretchy circle with more down for now, and then later add in more down and more impulsion.
Then we did some leg yield, which improves considerably when a) I work on the long side first, which is harder, as a warm up, which makes leg yield "easy", and b) when I, at the quarter line, check in on my outside rein/outside hand and make sure I'm maintaining the connection and not dropping it. When I don't check in, and I'm looking for the next movement, I drop that connection and his shoulder bulges out. Which is what feels like his hindquarters trailing, but is really a shoulder bulging.
Then we did the lengthening canter and the hard Test 1-2 down transition, where you rocket towards M and then are going back to working around the corner to C. This is not a news flash, but for an eventer, I'm a wimp and I don't really let him do his full lengthening potential. The other common error is to let him go too much on the forehand; it should be a "jumping" lenghthening feeling each stride.
We worked on not breaking to trot when you go back to working canter by lengthening, then turning off the rail and making a circle that progressively gets smaller (the same "horsey sit ups" that I have been doing the last few lessons that have strengthened his butt but still make both of us sweat) and then canter off in working canter. Or what I think of as working canter. And this is our beginning of collection: I lean back, and think "lift lift lift" with each canter stride on the little circle, and when he's tired, have to ask him (with voice, leg, and whip) to keep doing it. He got pretty tired towards the end of the lesson.
Mike says that by the end of the season, we'll be able to go back to working right at M, but that it's normal for me, and everyone else riding 1st level, to have to start slowing down a bit before M and use that M-C space to make the movement for now.
And finally, we worked on the counter canter loop, thank goodness, because I had been doing it as a leg yield! It is really a "V". Canter from K to X (diagonal line) then from X to H (another diagonal line) without changing leads. I was bending him in the neck like it was a leg yield from K to X and then switching the bend in his neck to ride X to H. Bad Martha!
This was right at the end of our lesson, so I think I'll want a little more follow up to make sure I am understanding that movement.
All in all, a very satisfying lesson, with plenty to work on, plenty of improvement, and an amazing amount of information that I never, ever would have picked up on my own for this year's showing in dressage.
And a VERY well-behaved Willig who, for the most part, ignored the wind. He is a bit easier to ride when he's on the verge of too peppy - both because he's got the lift and impulsion from his own peppiness, but also because I ride every single second because I'm waiting for the explosion, instead of getting "lazy" (I never feel lazy on Willig, but sometimes I might be a micromillimeter more relaxed).

Morning at the barn

2011-03-10T20:09:00.000-08:00

I have oodles and oodles of stress right now, and was rushing to the barn for a morning lesson, and stressed about the change in my routine and the oodles of work waiting for me as soon as the lesson was done.
And when I pulled up, this is what I saw and then everything seemed a little bit more manageable.
(It helped that then, despite the wind, I had a great lesson. But that's for the next post.)

Steady hands and (knock on wood) hives leaving?

2011-02-28T20:49:00.000-08:00

I forgot to mention that in my lesson, I started out with nice, quiet, even, consistent hands, but as things got tougher, my hands got a mind of their own. I'm pretty sure they were saying "Let's get out of here!" which doesn't help me at all with the whole "Let's go thatta way!"
Also, I don't want to jinx us, but the hives seem to be on their way out. This is bizarre, and possibly (??) related to the cold snap and/or the snow? Maybe he is eating something (moss???) that normally he doesn't eat because there's grass? Which he couldn't eat because he was inside and then it was covered with snow?
I have no idea, but I'll be really glad if that's it for this year.

Woot Woot! Train Willig coming through!

2011-02-27T19:22:00.000-08:00

For today's "jump" lesson, I wanted to experiment with the theory that what Willig is a bit difficult about doesn't have anything to do with the fences, per se, but the visuals (rails on the ground, things under the fence, i.e. his "scary stuff" box).
We put my box and some cones out, and then I waited to warm up until Shannon got out, so that she could also give me pointers on how to warm up properly, because in previous lessons, both she and Mike have pointed out that I kind of "blah" along for a while before we really get to work.
During this, I also asked about why Willig seems so comfortable - in fact, curious - about stuff when I'm on the ground, but then finds it scary when I'm on him. This goes along with the whole "get off to cross the ditch". When he sees me do it first, it builds his confidence. Just horse nature.
So we warmed up, and Shannon did say to tighten him up a bit, not to let him go long and low with his head or to get strung out and go fast, but other than the normal amount of huffing and puffing that accompanies a lesson (and not when I ride by myself), it was fairly non-eventful even though this was like the fourth day of snow.
Then we started going past the scary stuff. I'd ride past it with the crop on the side that I expected him to shy to (i.e. in my left hand if we were passing something with his right eye), and the take away message here was: (drum roll) I ride like a passenger, not the conductor of Train Willig. Even though I'd see him start to look, and start to bend, and start to move away, it wasn't until Shannon would yell at me that I'd react. I could feel it coming an entire 1/4 circle away, and yet would do nothing until she told me to. I'm soooo passive. It's weird.
So then she moved stuff around and eventually brought in the Gator and a snow shovel (which was more scary than the Gator, fyi) and we went past it both directions at the trot and the canter and lo and behold, if I was consistent and assertive, Willig would go past it. He might bend a tiny amount, or do that gawky eyeball roll towards it, but if I was being the boss, he'd be the horse. Go figure.
Then we switched to the scary side, and did a new exercise, where we made 10 meter circles down the long line to the scary side. This added a new element of also going back past the pile of scary things but from a different angle. Again, riding him assertively, confidently, and consistently meant less hassle for both of us. What was weird again was how much I'm reluctant to use the whip or my voice. And when I do use it, I usually forget to praise when he does it right. And then I frequently use it ahead of time (once I get "whip" into my repetoire) instead of immediately after he's bad. And when he gets himself a bit worked up, it takes me a while to turn him (away from the side he's being bad to) and then I like to just stop, instead of working him harder. So if he's trying to canter off left like a jerk, then I turn him right and make him do a tiny canter circle several times so that it is more work to be a jerk than to just go where I wanted us to go in the first place.
So - this gave me a lot to work on, but I ended the lesson feeling, kind of bizarrely, really good. Even though I got Willig with the (now I feel stupid writing this) goal of riding him at Training Level or higher, and we're now going on the flat past a pile of crap, the light bulb went off for me on the stuff we've been working on over fences for a year (or more) now. I'm not RIDING him to the fence. I can work during the week, by myself, on these consistent firm aids and praise, and maybe, just maybe, it's been my three years of being a pansy that has made him fearful of the fences (although I think he's a bit of a goof and probably always going to be unreliable to a degree), and if I can undo that and teach him that never mind, I am the boss after all, and he can trust me, maybe in a few months, once we've mastered it on the flat, we can go back to trying it over fences. Because he is gorgeous when he's in the air. It's just the stuff on the ground that's the problem. And it's not him - it's me. I've got to learn to ride this.
Note to parents everywhere: invest in a good trainer for your kid. In the long run, it will pay off.

Down in the dumps post

2011-02-22T22:07:00.000-08:00

Saturday was really windy, and with some time off that week, Willig was full of joie la vie (i.e. he had a couple good bucks on the lunge line), so I ended up using my lesson to discuss the merits of selling him, the progress he's made, what I want to do, and the like.
Today it was windy again, and he was Mr. Placid on the lunge line, and then, even when a wall of wind hit the barn like a tsunami, hardly flicked an ear. Willig's Motto: "Consistent Only In My Inconsistency". Maybe that's the motto for all horses, though.
Actually, it gets right to the heart of what was bothering me about my lesson. I was running through the same ruminations with Mike, and he pointed out that in his experience, a horse doesn't change its personality based on its work; i.e. a willing, patient horse who puts up with a lot of noodly banging around inside (ahem - my interpretation of me riding dressage) is probably going to be a willing, patient horse who puts up with a lot of crap over fences. But Willig isn't. And THAT'S what's weird. Why not? And what can I do about it? And have I really tried everything there is to try? And is it - horrors - me? Am I really just kind of a lousy, backyard rider? Is it ME who hates the fences? And if so, why do I think that I like them?
So Mike pointed out the obvious - if I'm not in the mood for hard work, and he's had a few days off, after I lunge him, just put him on the freaking draw reins already (NOT over fences, though, kids). Choose my fights, as Shannon said for Saturday's wind.
Then he pointed out that we warm up like slugs (these are my words). I drag around and around, and maybe a couple laps in actually start pulling things together. He's told me this before. Get on him and get riding, especially when he's had a few minutes on the lunge line.
From here we went to working on left bend, and trying to find whatever it is in me that holds the right side so tight. He had me bend with the left rein, leg yield with the left leg, then open with the right hand (like I'm going "ta-da" sweeping my hand out to the right), holding my right leg out and away from him, and then putting more weight in the right stirrup. (I was too chicken with the wind to try it, but he said ride with only one stirrup as a good exercise.)
And after a while, I started to be able to feel a bit more. This is weird, because this is the biggest feeling block I've ever hit. Like I can lean back (i.e. get vertical) and I feel "Woo! I'm falling backwards onto my back!") but when he says "pull left and leg yield to the right" I can BARELY feel it. Way later, at the end of the lesson, I pointed out that I could feel it when we were on a little circle, but around 15 meters was where I stopped being able to feel it and had to look to see where his head and neck was. So Mike said "so look then".
We did that for a long time, which was frustrating.
Then he had us ride down past the scary end where "the wind blows up his tail" and Willig didn't want to go past, but after a couple times, gave in and was like "fine". We went past with the leg yielding over - i.e. staying off the rail to give myself enough space to move him by leg yielding so that I have space to get closer and not ram right into the back wall.
Then we did some canter work, holding the outside rein contact steady so that Willig can't lift his head with the transition. Again, the first couple times he was confused because we were doing something different (he so loves to reveal that the flaws all come from me), but then he got it, and then quit trying to lift his head at all - even when we switched directions.
And this goes to my starting point. I don't get it. He's so willing and eager to please, almost, smart even. He knows all this dressage stuff already, and is just waiting for me to give the correct aids. So why are fences so freaking hard? My other horse friend was telling me how she brought her horse out to Aspen to school, and he just did every BN fence - even the big canoe. And here I am, AT HOME, and Willig can't do a 2' thing. What's the deal?
So then we dropped my left stirrup, got the whip across my left leg, and then got on a little 10-12 meter circle going left, and bent his head and neck to the left, while I pushed his hindquarters out with the whip and my leg. And then grew the circle out to 20 meters, and then did it again. And again, he caught on to this after just a few times and did it just fine.
So take away: be firm, consistent, and the boss about the contact and the bending.

Hive expansion

2011-02-13T21:21:00.000-08:00

The hives picked today to start really spreading. Both the left and right side of his neck had the few medium sized ones, that have now deflated, but look like moon craters.
And now his body has numerous small speckled hives.
So it's not hay, not cob, and not ulcers.

Also, it is much, much harder than I thought to get good video and photos of Willig in motion. Tom used a tripod, but with all the light that our arena gets, the video will have 5 seconds of excellent focus, then we go past one of the light walls so we go completely dark, then it adjusts, but by then we're in front of the open door, so we go completely dark again, so then it adjusts, but then we're back in the corner without natural light, so then when it adjusts, we're perfect for 5 seconds, and then back in front of light. I guess next we'll try videoing at night, when there's no pesky sun ruining it.
And of course, Willig was super well behaved and peppy today.

That being said, we did video me schooling test 1-2, and while we're still pretty small for most of the test (except for when we loom right past the camera), at least it's not shaking or with a fence rail blocking most of the view:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W7LRwzIejLk
I oscillate between being thrilled with how great he looks, and how much my riding has improved, and being heartbroken at how much I still suck.

Willig is for sale

2011-02-10T21:11:00.000-08:00

I changed my mind. He doesn't like to jump, and we could both be unhappy making tiny steps of progress over the next 10 years, or I could let him do a job he loves. It just happens that I'm not ready to do that job yet. I want to keep jumping.
I'm going to stick with my plan for the next few months, while he's listed, but maybe his dream owner will walk into his life and I'll see that it was the right decision. Or maybe I'll give up on wanting to event, or maybe the light bulb will go off for him and he'll realize eventing is pretty cool.
DreamHorse.com Horse ID: 1652007 - Wise Guy
He's on dream horse under "Wise Guy".

Another horse in my barn is for sale on Dream Horse too - an adorable pony named Zoe, who makes me wish I was 25 years younger or just really, really short:
DreamHorse.com Horse ID: Zoe
And then Holly, for someone more experienced than me who can take a well-raised horse wherever she wants to go, which maybe I'd be able to do if I stuck with Willig for the next 10 years and actually learned how to ride a horse:
DreamHorse.com Horse ID: Perfect Holiday
Think of it. You could make a day of it visiting our barn.

1-2 improvement

2011-02-08T20:21:00.000-08:00

We rode 1-2 in my last lesson, and wooo, what an improvement two weeks has made! I think I've only ridden it a couple of times, and it surprised me when I knew the test today. Being used to the eventing tests, it's the longest, most complicated test I've ever done.
It was really great to have Mike watch and comment, because he has a lot of tips and insight into some of the "details". For example, you walk on a long rein from K to X and then from X to H, then medium walk to C, then trot at C, then at R a 20 meter stretchy circle. And I had a hard time with the logistics of this sequence of movements (from H to R) - it seems weird to have a long rein, suck them up, trot, let them back out, all in basically the short corner. Mike's tip was not to suck the reins all the way up. Brilliant, simple, and I can almost guarantee it never would have occurred to me on my own.
We started with some obedience/bending work. Mike had me take charge of Willig's connection, and then keep it. From the halt, I connected him up (to make the waterfall neck) and then I had to keep that neck, particularly when I knew he was going to try to shoot it up to look outside, and then I also had to keep the inside bend, even if it meant using a heavy hand. This worked really well, and after a couple of times past the scary side, Willig gave up on battling me and just went past nicely. What was a bit weird was how out of breath it made me.
Also, I am still clenching up with my knees and grabbing with them whenever I get the least little bit nervous. So we're also back to thinking about putting my legs down and long.
Side note on Willig's progress: we warmed up entirely on the scary end, almost without incident, despite two riders outside and a car, and B with a pitchfork cleaning up some poop at that end.
Then we did canter work, and our first transition (like always, it seems) was sloppy. Mike pointed out that to ask him to keep going into it, by pushing him onto his forehand and making him run, doesn't get me what I want. Go ahead and regroup. Don't insist on canter if it's ugly.
Then we did what I call horsey sit-ups (even though they're not, but it's stuck in my head), where we made the canter smaller and smaller. Willig did excellent at this. From December, when he could hardly do two steps, to now, where he can just keep going around and around until Mike tells us to stop, is a world of difference. And I don't have to work as hard either.
My homework for the next lesson is to keep working on horsey sit-ups, which I think (but am not sure about), are helping Willig build muscle for collection. Mike said it's important to think lift-lift (like rearing) and not let him slam down on his forehand (the easy way out for him).
Second side note: Willig has been a bit tired the last two days, so it was also impressive how he didn't try to act naughty to avoid work, even though he was willing to walk along stretched out on a long rein (usually, it takes an hour of hard riding before he really wants to stretch out and down).
Then to work more without stirrups. I have let that slack with everything else.
And ugh! There was a third major thing that now I can't remember.
I also talked with him a bit at the start about Willig's attitude. He pointed out that I won't learn anything on a horse that doesn't challenge me. Very true, but it's also not as much fun to be constantly struggling. But then I went to the gym and spent time thinking about it while I was running, and when Willig is brilliant - holy cow is he amazing. It's just that he's brilliant only maybe 10% of the time. So CAN he increase that? I think he has come a long way, and I am learning an enormous amount, and Mike believes that the dressage will translate to the jumping. And while he's not what I wanted (isn't that life, though?) maybe I'll learn something different. So I'm going to stick with my plan for the next six months, and then I'll re-evaluate again, because if I'm going to sell him, I might as well put in a break with the crazy period coming up at work when I won't be able to ride anyway. Although I have been making excuses for a while now, deep down I really like him, even if it does make me anxious every time I jump. But when he jumped that course Sunday - it was a delight. And last year at Caber - a delight. And when we learn something new in dressage - a delight. And when he picks his head up and comes to the fence because I called his name - also a delight. He's not what I would have picked for myself, but maybe in the long-term, there's a reason the universe got him for me. At least for the next six months.

In hive news, after 3 days without a new hive, today he had three new ones on the right side of his neck. Bummer. It probably wasn't the cob, or ulcers, since he's on his 4th day of the omeprazalone (sp?) and they said it only took 24 hours to see a difference. BUT - just a few small ones a month after the first one (and some deflated fat ones) is something I can live with. I just wish I knew what caused them.

No more whining

2011-02-08T20:04:00.001-08:00

Willig is who he is. I'll decide by the end of the season whether his moments of brilliance and his lack of inherent braveness are things I can live with.

"It must be borne in mind that the tragedy of life does not lie in not reaching your goal. The tragedy of life lies in having no goal to reach."
-Benjamin E. Mays

I wouldn't be happy without a goal, and he gives me plenty. :)

Jump Day: Willig's Version

2011-02-06T15:13:00.001-08:00

I was happy to see my mom this morning when she showed up, and it's so nice when she grooms me and gets all that hair out. We rode in the normal spot but without music, so I thought something might be up. I was kind of tired after Thursday and then being ridden hard yesterday, so I wasn't feeling much like making a big deal out of things. I was so happy when she got off after only half an hour!
We went on a walk outside, but then we walked around and around the outside arena. I got to see a whole bunch of fences, but then she got back on me. Man, that's annoying when I think we're done and then I have to go back to work.
And so (sigh) of course I had to keep patiently training her on how to ride me quietly but assertively. She started out her normal kind of wimpy approach to fences, so I was like "look, mom, I do this to be nice to you, and I don't have to do it". She put me on the lunge line for a while, which was nice because I got to vent my frustration with always having to explain everything to her like she's a little 6 year old rider. She can be so slow sometimes! And then that crazy white demon came out into his yard and I had to keep an eye on him to protect us both. She's so silly - she put that boyfriend of hers down there so the demon would eat him first! Oh well, works for me. I'm WAY faster than a bipedal human if the demon comes over again.
I felt a little better after the lunge, so then we did a small course twice, and I think I finally got the message across: "Stop talking about selling me. I am gorgeous and fun. You just need to ride me properly and not scare me too much."
It was a pretty fun day, and then I got lots of kisses, pats, and treats just for doing my job.
http://www.youtube.com/user/Tomonbelay#p/a/u/0/RSXwgs1yFwY

Jump Day: Martha's Version

2011-02-06T15:03:00.000-08:00

Because Willig was unjumpable for J on Thursday (a wise move on her part, and a good heads up for me), I started today inside with an easy warm up (and a good, although not spectacular Willig) and then a few times over the little 2' fence inside.
Then we went outside, and he got to walk around for a while while I adjusted the height and spread of the fences. A great course was already set up, but I just made it a couple of 2' fences, mostly 2'3"-2'5" fences, and a couple of 2'6"-2'7" fences. I wasn't going to try the wall today, but I adjusted the blue barrels and a couple of small oxers.
Warming up outside, Willig was smack dab in between good Willig and naughty Willig, so I tried him over a few fences, and then went ahead and put him on the lunge line when he didn't improve:
http://www.youtube.com/user/Tomonbelay#p/a/u/1/F5K7Yewz9BY (Special note to Shannon - when he tries to run out on landing, you can hear me making the "eeehhh - eeehhh" (i.e.: "You're a bad horse") noise!)
He wasn't too crazy on the lunge, but of course then the poodle came out.
So I used what we've done in my lessons and stuck Tom at the far end, and then did a little course twice. Caveat: I didn't jump the blue barrel and I took out the combination with the oxer because with the show next weekend and us not working outside much this winter, I wanted to build confidence more than I wanted to push his envelope this week, particularly since this was his first time outside in a long while, and this was a tremendous improvement from his Thursday "ride" with J.
Here's how we ended. It's hard to see because of the light:
http://www.youtube.com/user/Tomonbelay#p/a/u/2/kN1Hg3Wg0mA
I kissed him so hard I hurt my lip.
He was sweet, steady, and perfectly reliable.
So I'm considering this a solid performance - nice, linear improvement and fun to ride. Special bonus - Shannon suggested I get Tom to video so I could see me - although I'm little and far away (and dark), my lower leg isn't moving!!! Praises to Shannon and Mike - all those lessons are paying off!

Hoof Holding

2011-02-05T20:06:00.000-08:00

My fingers are crossed, but taking the tiny amount of cob out of Willig's grain might have been the hivey golden ticket. It was Wednesday that I put up the note to change it, so in the best case (and I think the morning grain was already mixed) he's been cob-free for three days. The left neck hives were flatter and going away, the couple of scattered body hives (small ones) were deflating, the right neck hives were flatter and going away, and I didn't see a single new hive.
We'll see.
I started him on omeprazole, which he wouldn't eat, and probiotics today too. I thought maybe he didn't like the homemade applesauce, but I ate some when I got home and it was fine, so the omeprazole must smell pretty strong. I really don't want to have to syringe it down his throat.
In other thoughts, the last couple days I've been upset because he was bad again for my rider. My friend who rides dressage said I should really just go ahead and sell him as a dressage horse. Here's how (sorry for the repetition from like every other post), I view the options:
- Willig is just a slow learner, and if I'm patient (aka stubborn) and just keep trying, eventually the light bulb will go off for him.
- Willig will never enjoy jumping, and it will also be kind of nerve-wracking and not very much fun. I want to jump in the last 20 years I think I could reasonably do it. (I figure 55 should be my retirement from jumping and just switch to dressage for the "last" (?) 10 years of riding.)
Actually, I guess that's the range of his response.
So then my options are:
- Sell him as a dressage horse. He is really quite a nice mover.
- Keep stubbornly trying to jump him for another year (?) and see if he's a slow learner or if he really, truly hates to jump. (Him being bad for J is my proof that it isn't just me. For the last year, I thought it was just because I was timid on him.)
- Give up on jumping him and just ride him dressage.
And the one I like:
- Stubbornly stick out this year, if he still hates it, ride him dressage, and then in about five years, get a second horse who can jump. I'll only get one more jumper and then one more dressage horse out of my life, but ...
I'm kind of fond of him. It's really, really cool to be able to ride the 1st level tests and work on the 2nd level movements. I like it a lot more than I thought I would. I'm just not ready to not jump yet.
I just don't know which it is - is he going to catch on eventually? Or am I trying to fit him (a square peg) into a sport he doesn't like (a round hole)?

April 9 hunter jumper benefit horse show at Forest Park

2011-02-03T21:00:00.000-08:00

Forest Park Equestrian Center is hosting "The Road to Kentucky Benefit Horse Show" for two of the Baywood Pony Club members who are raising money to go to the eventing championships (in Kentucky) this July.
There are 9 hunter classes (ground pole to open hunter 3'3") starting at 9 am, with schooling from 8-9 am, and then jumper classes (ground pole to intermediate 3'9") beginning at 1 pm. Classes are $15 ahead of time, $10 for a schooling round, $20 post entry classes, and $10 haul in, with food and a silent auction.
Please come and support these great riders!
Post a comment with your email (I won't publish it) and I'll send you the entry form. (I can't figure out how to post it as an image.)

Willig future hive treatment?

2011-02-02T21:32:00.000-08:00

Willig's hives are continuing to spread, only in slow motion. Right now he's getting, once a day, a big scoop of Platinum Performance, a huge heaping scoop of Platinum skin & allergy, a heaping scoop of Riva's Remedies Equi-Derm, and an equal size scoop of flax. In prior years, I have given him this twice a day and with Strongid. His nose and chin also still have that weird "sunburn" looking thing, but as of yesterday I tried quitting the blue antiseptic stuff (I forgot it's name) and am just using the baby butt stuff (desitin?) to see if it makes any difference over the next few days. If it lasts much longer, I'm going to have to finally give up and call the vet.
He has a few small hives scattered over his body, but they are mostly on the left side of his neck and chest (big but flat) where they started, and today, a few more on the right side of his neck - big and flat. Nothing crazy compared to in the past, but each day it seems like there's one more and the neck ones have gotten a bit bigger and flatter.
I actually had an email exchange and then a phone conversation with a representative from Riva's Remedies (http://rivasremedies.com/), where I get the herbal blend (Equi-Derm) of chickweed, plantain, and yellow dock. (I'd put up a link, but they're changing their website this weekend I think, to make it easier to order online.)
The very helpful representative not only knew more than any vet or fellow sufferer that I've talked to, but she had some suggestions:
First - no cob. Horses don't digest corn well, but it also tends to be the most heavily treated with various nasty poisons (my wording), and sometimes it is processed with cow feed, which can have other additives that aren't good for horses. She said there have been a couple of feed recalls from contaminants that the feed stores know about, but there's no requirement that the information about it also gets distributed to the horse/cow owners who bought the feed. So today I took Willig off his 1/4 scoop of cob twice a day and now he'll get 1/2 scoop of oats (instead of 1/4 of each).
Second - no clover! She said frequently the hives are associated with clover. This is weird because that's what I had heard from my vet too, but then the "all alfalfa" diet was the thing that kept them in check last year, after many other failed efforts.
Third - watch what's in the fields and turn-out. And watch what the neighbors treat their fields and turn-outs with. Here's something I've never asked about - whether the timing of them has anything to do with any field treatments that Shannon does for weed and pests. I can't imagine she did one in the dead of winter, but it's probably worth asking, although it seems really unlikely that the one day a week (on average) that I hand graze him would result in hives.
Finally - a lot comes from hind-gut problems, so she suggested I try ulcer remedies and pro-biotics, which is also what one of the fellow boarders suggested. She recommended several that they carry, but I had actually already ordered probiotics, ulcergard, and a free sample to try, and I am anxiously looking at the mail each day. Their remedies are: allerg-ease, equi-cleanse, pro-colon, pro-dygest, and vitamin C. So I will definitely try those next after I go through the ones I'm waiting on.
She thought it was very unusual that we had four horses that have slightly different combinations (I looked at the feed chart today and two (Willig & G) get cob while two (A & M) don't; and two (G & A) go out on the grass rotation while two (Willig & M) don't) out of 21, getting them at different times of year, and not matching any of the "obvious" changes like hay or bedding. I agreed. She also said that they have heard more and more horses are getting them, and that it's getting harder for people to keep them under control with herbs and not having to use prednisone and stuff. Yech.

As an aside, today I jumped Willig over a tiny (two fence) course that I turned into a 3 minute course several times, the last time without stirrups. He wanted to be a little silly about the fences, but I just sat down and rode, and although he was kind of awkward over the little vertical (a little shy of 2'), I think it was because I don't put down the ground line and he didn't know where to take off. That, or he was just being a jerk face. I think he has a sense of humor, because he waits until I put the desitin on his nose, and then waits for me to bend over, and then he likes to jab me with his nose with a sneak attack from behind, and leave a bit white spot from the desitin. Maybe he's always done it, but I think he's saying "If my nose has to smell like a baby's butt, then so do you!"

What it feels like when Willig bucks

2011-01-31T22:36:00.000-08:00

My mom forwarded internet photos, and this was among them. Unfortunately, no identified credit (other than on the side of the photo).
But this is how high it feels like we are in the air when Willig bucks. Seriously.

Elbows glued to hips

2011-01-25T22:13:00.000-08:00

Today's dressage lesson was back to the good ol' days of progress into new areas, instead of working on going past the &#*(# scary side. Whew. Although it made my legs burn, and (disgusting alert) when I was all done and changing clothes to smell slightly less bad, I was soaking wet under my vest. Blech, but kind of satisfying.
We started with a brief discussion about my ride on Charlie, and how useful it was for me to ride another horse and then ride Willig. Mike pointed out that all horses are different, and while Charlie has some strengths, with some work, Willig will have strengths too (and different ones). A lot of what I commented on was training, that, over time, Willig will also (presumably) attain. Mike said that although frustrating now, Willig's jitteriness could transform into attentiveness for higher level riding, where every single step is something different that you're asking for. But he has to focus on me instead of the outside world, to be able to do that.
Then we started with some trot work, with Mike telling me, well, ok, you can be all floppy around when you start, but why don't you start pulling things together right away? Even though I had been out there 20 minutes warming up, most of that we walked past the scary side, and I don't know why it takes a good 10-15 minutes to really get him connected - I mean, obviously it's me. Maybe I need to warm up?
Anyway, so then we started pulling him together, Mike checked in on his responsiveness to the aids (those walk-trot-canter-trot-walk we've been doing have made a huge difference, and see Charlie discussion where I'd lurch forward at each down transition because it turns out I didn't actually expect him to do it when I asked him to) and my sitting trot, which, thanks to the chiropractor, his homework, and those miracle balls, has gone back to being doable.
Then Mike had us do something terrible, which was hold onto to the pommel (couldn't do) so saddle pad (could only barely do), at which point we lost all steering and careened around totally out of control (from my perspective). Little did I know that this was going to lead to today's big lesson.
Then we did a bit of canter, which Mike said was just so much better than last year because he's pulled together.
Then I asked about him flinging his neck around, and Mike said that was soft hands - I give away the connection ALL THE TIME, and then he showed me how if I think about keeping him bent to the left, and maintain the connection, the head flinging stops. It doesn't really exist when we're going right, because of that iron right hand I've got.
So then we worked on Test 1-2, just going through it. It was rough around the edges, but not so bad. The only part that's still sticking for me is the down transition from canter to trot or from lengthened trot to sitting trot again. Mike said that working on the simple lead change (which is not a canter, trot, canter, like I thought, but canter - walk - canter) for 2nd level (because if something is hard for you, you shouldn't be showing that yet, but working on it at home, BUT working on canter-walk-canter will help us do canter-trot or lengthen-sit). But to get there, we went back to connection.
Mike had me stop and imagine my arms as side reins. The way I think about this is elbows clamped to hips. Then Willig's neck arched up and tucked and got all 'waterfall' (and he wanted to back up), so then we did walk-halt-walk-trot-canter with the connection staying constant. This was hard for Willig - he wanted to avoid working - but he wasn't being naughty. So then we made the canter a bit smaller (just around Mike) and it was divine. He'd just LIFT his back and be cantering and it was so soft and easy to ride. This made me grin each time he did it.
Mike said to warm up for about 15 minutes, then work on elbows clamped to hips for about 15 minutes, then do something he knows how to do (that we've been working on) for about 15 minutes. But not to do 100% of elbows clamped to hips because it's new and hard.
It was a great lesson. Then we walked outside and did a quick, short lap in the pasture, and a tired Willig is a much more relaxed Willig.
He does have a little patch of hives on the left side (the same two big and deflated) and then the right side looks like the same mess of them but not yet blown up. It just looks like he slept on his hair wet right now. So (fingers crossed) hopefully our little system is holding them at bay until whatever allergen is setting them off again goes away.

My new favorite thing

2011-01-24T07:30:00.000-08:00

Although it forces me to admit I'm getting old.

Two jump lessons and two good lessons

2011-01-23T19:20:00.000-08:00

Shannon let me ride her training-level eventer, Charlie, for my Saturday lesson, and wooo-weee it was fun! (And educational. But mostly fun.)
We had a little 3-jump course with a little vertical and a bendy line, although of course Shannon had us start out on the flat. Charlie was soooo much easier to ride than Willig, both in his attentiveness and responsivness, and just sitting on him and riding. Especially when we started the canter, it was like sitting on a lake in a gently rocking boat, instead of, oh, on a surfboard in a hurricane.
When I asked Charlie for a down transition, he did it the SECOND that I asked, so I was constantly lurching forward because I wasn't ready for it when I asked for it, which did an amazing job of showing me how Willig has trained me back. I expect the transition to come at least two strides after I ask for it.
Charlie was also a total gentlemen when he'd pop his head up and I'd ask him to come back into connection with the bit, he'd do it immediately. I noticed his ears spent an awful lot of time listening to me, instead of radaring around looking for things to be scared of.
Although Charlie has (or maybe used to have) some of Willig's bad habits (not all of them, and he's got a few different ones), Shannon has had him since he was a young little colt (3, I think), and has trained him to be quite the nice horse.
The only other stand-out thing on the flat (other than how much fun I was having riding someone responsive) was that I had a terrible time getting him to pick up the ... right lead. When we switched to the left, he did it instantly. So when we went back to the right, I figured out it was my leg not moving back from the hip (what Mike has been telling me, and where I think the chiropractor connects in). I usually just squeeze, but when I'm "moving my leg back" I'm really just lifting it up to the saddle pad, which just confused Charlie. It was neat, if a bit painful, to see how horses read us.
When we jumped, Charlie was really gung-ho. It scared me a bit, because he actually went towards and over the jumps, and I had to think "1-2-1-2" to keep him steady and even on the way there. But he also just flew - it was soooooo easy to stay balanced on top of him, even the couple of times he took off a bit long or short - and (big sigh of relief) I do still love jumping. I haven't become a 35 year old chicken. Willig is just hard to jump. I also, even though I didn't know Charlie, noticed that I came to each fence so much more relaxed than I approach any fence (or anything) on Willig. I could sit back and wait for the fence because I wasn't anxious.
I was grinning for the entire rest of the day because I had so much fun riding him.

I rode Willig after that lesson, but we just puttered around indoors, went on a walk in the outdoor arena, and then went on a walk and did some hills and the water in the pasture. He was fine, not very spooky.
I did a lot of comparison, and the best way I can think of to describe it is that Willig is kind of squirrely compared to Charlie. He is constantly jerking and moving, and to ride him, I have to think about like 10 different things at a time, while Charlie I could just THINK about 1 or 2, and then just RIDE the rest. Willig doesn't pay as much attention to me as he does to the external world, he's harder physically to sit on, and he kind of jerks around, like a jumpy computer screen, even when he's being perfectly well behaved. I can't quite put my finger on how to describe the difference, but it makes a HUGE difference in how I sit up there.
Then today we had another jump lesson, but on Willig. He started out a tiny bit off (and he has a little patch of three hives. Compared to the last two years, they are staying under control instead of exploding over his whole neck and body, but they itch, which is different) but worked through it, something I have seen a handful of times. Then he was being a kook about the far end, even with Shannon standing at the gate, but we had to ride down there because another lesson was at the "friendly" end. This turned out to be good, because when we started jumping, he tried to bolt (he didn't try hard, but he tried) twice after the fence, and twice I managed to pull him the other direction and put him back to work. But then, we came around the corner and he did some leapy spastic thing and I finally just got, instead of scared, MAD, and started RIDING him, and then he was a gentleman the entire rest of the lesson.
So we did a three fence course from two different directions, and although he also came in a bit funny a few times (because he was looking at the lesson and other riders instead of the fence), he jumped each one like a champ. The big takeaway was that on the flat, when he kept being a goof, I kept being mad, until after a few laps Shannon started telling me what to do, and then the light bulb went off - why would I expect him to act different on his own each lap? I need to tell him what i want him to do different.
Let me go ahead and make this a take away message - I'm still slow on the punishment and almost non-existent on the praise. How in the world do I expect Willig to learn when I am not consistent, and when I almost never tell him "that's what I wanted, good boy"? He has no idea what I want from him without that effort on my part to breach the species-divide, and I'm just like a lousy girlfriend/parent, who nags nags nags and never shows appreciation. So Shannon had to remind me a couple of times, but I am trying harder to remember to either say "good boy" or give him a scratch with my fingers (I don't like to pat his neck) when he's done something that I asked.
And then I was jumping ahead in a big way, and when I opened my mouth to tell Shannon, I realized I should just fix it, so I went to each fence after that thinking "defensive heels" and that solved it.
Then I rode him thinking 1-2-1-2-1-2 to each fence, and then softening two strides out, and that took care of pretty much everything else.
And I also, because we were working on two curvy lines (for us), looked for the next fence. That worked spectacularly well when it was just one fence on a circle, and was not as good when I was doing the whole course.
Willig was a champ. I had a good time, although when he did his leapy thing, I held my breath and just about killed myself trying to ride him afterwards beacause I hadn't been breathing.
Shannon was happy because I actually rode him, and when I did, he responded really well. And I was happy because I handled the little events, and then knew (finally!) what to do with his antics.

Horse people

2011-01-21T19:25:00.001-08:00

We were at the bank yesterday, and the woman we were talking with had a picture of her daughter showjumping their AQHA stallion over a nice size looking fence. She mentioned that she needed to get her knee replaced, and before I could make a joke to avoid her saying it was from a horse, she said it was from her years of barrel racing. The *second* we walked out the door, Tom pounced on it.
Also, the same horsey friend with the 4-yo OTTB from the last post was telling me how her husband gets excited when she comes home after a bad day of riding and grumbles about the time and the money and why do we do this, and then is deflated when the next day she comes home from a great day of riding.
I don't know other people who get the same kind of pent up stress if they don't get to ride. It's like turning the valve and letting off my steam. Even if it has been mostly the painful (and arduous) kind of learning lately instead of the fun kind of learning.

2 steps away from my huff (and two halves)

2011-01-21T19:15:00.001-08:00

I had a good dressage lesson yesterday. The take away homework was:
- Lean back during the sitting trot and "firm up" my core. No more wavy following, but a firm, controlled "bounce". I can only just barely feel what my body is doing when I get it right - it is some refined motor control I don't control yet, but when I get it right, I feel Willig lift up in his shoulders. It feels to me kind of like, lean back (which is really just straight), think belly button pulled into spine like in pilates, have my heels and lower legs right, and then it is kind of a "sucking" him up on the down step with my inner thighs and butt. But it is something a little more than that, and I can't put my finger on what I am doing when I hit the last magic button, and I also can't make them all align at once when I want them to.
- Work on the responsiveness to the aids. Walk-trot-walk-halt-walk-canter-trot-walk immediately.
- Keep the correct bend in the shallow loops of counter canter. I have been, with that pesky right hand, turning his neck to the right.
- Work on "horsey sit ups" - the collected, small 10 meter canter. Do the responsiveness on a circle spiraling in, when I get in, ask for the canter, hold it for 2-3 strides, and then go big and let him trot. These are the rough foundation stones for the next cool stuff to come. Side note: 2-3 strides of this is like the same as 10 minutes of regular trotting around the arena - hard stuff.
Willig was pretty much a gentleman and worked pretty hard.
I am crossing my fingers that his recent few months of being kind of a doofus are the transition into starting 2nd level movements and polishing our 1st level, and that it's his way of testing me to see if I'm really going to make him work. And maybe we have, for the moment, passed that hurdle and he's back to giving me his good work outs.
The half step away from my huff is he was also good for J today, who jumped him on a bendy line.
The half step back toward my huff is a new horsey friend who bought a 4 year old off the track thoroughbred 6 months ago, showed him at the end of the year last year, and he jumps 3', ditches, and banks without batting an eye. (shaking my fist at the sky) He's a real cutie too.

A jump lesson that resulted in one step away from my huff

2011-01-16T18:38:00.000-08:00

Today Shannon worked us hard, but effectively got me one step out of my bad mood that I've been stewing in for the past couple weeks.
Willig started out lazy on the lunge line and in our warm up (**and he has, on the left side of his neck, a whole nest of baby hives percolating**), but then, just after Shannon set up a new fence and before we could get going, he spooked at a flock of European starlings out the "scary" end, and then pretty much stayed in a mood the rest of the lesson. Unfortunately, that was really only about 20 minutes in, so I had 40 minutes of his mood.
The good news is that Shannon warned me at the beginning of the lesson to ride tough (mentally) and so it gave her the opportunity to teach me how to ride tough in a good lesson setting - not too crazy, but not Sweety McPacker either.
So we did a little cross rail with ground poles and a little vertical with ground poles, the latter with, when going clockwise, a hard right turn around the other fence, which scared me about making the turn but turned out to be doable. He tried to dart out to the right the first couple times over this, and miracle of miracles, I rode him to it, and used my wimpy right leg to keep him going "straight" over the fence instead of around it. Yay wimpy little right leg!
Then, as Shannon rearranged the fences into a little (2'3") oxer and a little bit bigger vertical than the first one, Willig decided he'd had enough of me not knowing how to stop him if he bolted, and gave us numerous opportunities for me to catch on. Mostly, these were him trying to bolt left (towards the barn; away from the scary end) so I had to pull HARD-right-fast. After a few times (thanks, Willig!*), I started to catch on, although I also just liked to steer him into the wall (not an option on cross country, I know).
(* = sarcasm)
So then we spent some time on a circle, then our first fence, then a circle with the new vertical (now smaller again), then other direction. This took a while.
Then he started acclerating toward the fence, and kind of rushing on the other side. So we worked on applying the brakes on the far side. Straight line to halt. This needed, sometimes, me leaning way back, and hands in the air pulling on his face, but after a few times of "oh, I'm really going to have to stop when Martha tells me to", he quit needing so much work.
This doesn't sound like much, but I was turning bright red and huffing and puffing because his head was like 2000 pounds of force, and so then Shannon had us work on control - squeeze, release, squeeze, release, and when she said halt, trot, back, or whatever, could I do it when she said to do it? Again, this one improved as we went along and Willig began to take me a bit more seriously, and (in Cartman's voice from South Park), "respect my author-a-tee".
Oh yeah, and somewhere in here Shannon turned on some vigorous music.
So then at the very end of the lesson we ended up with the circle we tried to start half way through the lesson - the vertical, past the scary end, over the oxer. Shannon wanted twice nice in a row, which we couldn't do the first couple times (rushing, mostly), so we had to do it a few times before we got something decent.
So the big change is to come into the fence, even from far out, with rhythm, and then keep it after the fence. It helped me a lot when Shannon said out loud 1-2-1-2 because I'd squeeze on 1 and release on 2 and it kept from me from ssqquuueeezzinggg the whole way to the fence.
Although not a fun lesson, it was a good confidence building and tool kit building lesson. Shannon's goal is to get me confident that I can jump him, and then hopefully that will be reflected in him building confidence that he can do whatever I am pointing him at - an upward spiral instead of the downward spiral we tend to fall into on our own. My goal is to be as comfortable as she and Mike are with shenanigans, and to ... get used to the idea that he's a horse and not a robot and isn't going to do exactly what I want him to do 100% of the time and is going to ... (news flash) act like a horse. Kind of a dumb ass horse, but that is another notch in the "lessons learned" belt for when I look for the next one. I'm fond of Willig, but he's teaching me really different stuff (good stuff, that I wish I learned a long time ago) than what I planned to learn from him, and I need to just get over that and accept where he's at and where I'm at and where we can go right now with that. I also need to remind myself, as I tend to be a black & white thinker, that when I'm feeling down, we're not going to be down the entire rest of my life, and when I'm on top of the world, enjoy it, because it isn't going to last either. Ahhh, meditation lessons creeping back in to my life to force me to learn them one way or the other.

My "show" goals for 2011

2011-01-09T18:34:00.000-08:00

March 19 - Peteton - 1-1 & 1-2
March ? - School at NWEC
April 16 - Peteton - 1-2 & 1-3
April? - NWEC Adult Rider Derby - Hopeful
April 30 - Donida - Hopeful
April? - School at NWEC
April? - recognized dressage? (1-1 & 1-2)
May 14? - NWEC Pony Club - Hopeful
May 14 (if NWEC is a different day) - Peteton - 1-2 & 1-3 & BN Eventing
June - School at NWEC twice
June - recognized dressage?
June 25/26 - FPEC - Mike's recognized dressage show - 1-2 & 1-3 both days if I've done ok so far
July 2 - Peteton or Donida
July ? - School NWEC
July 16 - Caber Pony Club - BN **IF** Willig has placed in the top 3 in all hopefuls and hasn't done anything dumb like spook at poles on the ground or run-out or buck
July ? - recognized dressage
August 13 - Donida - BN (same as 7/16)
August 20 - Peteton - 1-3 & MAYBE 2-1 & BN eventing
August 27 - Caber Pony Club - BN (same as 7/16)
September ? - School NWEC
September 24 - Peteton - 1-3 & 2-1 & wildly, 2-2
September? - recognized dressage

Then, if all goes well, the longer term goals will be:
2012: BN recognized & unrecognized; 2nd level dressage; freestyle test for 1st
2013: BN recognized; N unrecognized; 2nd/3rd level dressage; freestyle test for 2nd
2014: N recognized & unrecognized; 3rd level dressage

And I dare not even hope we'd make it to training level & 4th level before Willig is 20.

Tidbits - chiropractor & 2 hives

2011-01-09T18:31:00.000-08:00

Willig had one hive yesterday and a second one today, so tomorrow we are switching from Platinum Performance only, to Platinum, plus his Riva's Remedies herbs, and the Platinum mega-$ allergy stuff.
They don't really look like hives - more like two little bug bites, but since I can't imagine what bugs are out right now, better safe than sorry to try to nip this in the bud.

Also, I think the problem with the sitting trot (it was stiff) and Willig not picking up the right lead was my muscles being weird. I went to see a new chirpractor (long story that is really not that interesting) and he kept identifying these wack spots, and then telling me how the muscles being wack would affect me, and I kept thinking "well, that explains the sitting trot", "well, that explains the right lead the other day", "well, that further explains the sitting trot" on and on and on.
So hopefully, getting myself fixed up will help at least not give myself as many obstacles as possible riding.

Outside leg & Superjumper Willig

2011-01-09T18:19:00.000-08:00

Today Tom came out to help me with feeling when Willig's outside hind leg leaves the ground at the walk and trot so I can refine my aids.
He also hung around so I could jump a bit with a spotter, and took this video of Willig doing a little course and a photo of the approximate height and spread of the training fence we did in our last jump lesson.
http://www.youtube.com/user/Tomonbelay?feature=mhum#p/a/u/0/N4ZE7v6lQSA
(Hopefully the link works. Otherwise, search for Tomonbelay's videos and then Martha and Willig and about today's date.)
Here's the aid:
When walking clockwise (to the right), it's when your left hip is pointing towards his right shoulder. (Unless I reversed it - because it's the opposite of what I expected it to be.)
When posting the trot, it's as your seat starts to hit the saddle to sit before lifting again.
When sitting the trot, it is the "deeper" sit.
Willig was a total champ with the fences, which look puny on tape.
Jumping today, which I got anxious about ahead of time, and then wanted to throw a party afterwards I was so happy he was so good, cemented the lesson from my last lesson with Shannon and made me come up with a little strategy for preparing for this season. It's what everyone knows, but I somehow forgot: when you jump 2'9" at home, 2'6" at the show looks like nothing.
**I'M** the one who wants to jump, Willig could care less, and so if **I** want to feel comfortable jumping 2'6", then I need to work up to 2'9" at home and every scary thing I can throw at him, so when we get to the show, we BOTH think - "Oh, man, the stuff at home is sooo much harder. This is a cakewalk." It's the same test for moving up to the next level.
I'm amazed at how many times I have to say "duh" to myself.

The elusive right lead canter

2011-01-04T22:16:00.000-08:00

I don't know what was going on today, but we could not pick up the right lead canter to save our lives. Willig was doing gorgeous, beautiful collected canter work, and he has nooooo problem counter cantering, even on a little 10 meter circle. Or when I'm contorted around bending to the outside to "assist" him in picking it up correctly.
Now, of course, there's something actually going on with me (other than what appears to be a total mental riding break down), and somewhere on the right side of my body, I'm doing something that is so strong and powerful that it overrides the aids that I think I'm giving with the left side.
Today's take away is that I am so frustrated. Yesterday we had this decent ride where I finally felt like my heels got the message, and I was so looking forward to today's lesson to show that off, and instead, we could. not. pick. up. the. right. lead.
So I don't really have any takeaways, because all we did was flop around in circles and look like we had no idea what we were doing.
Mike spent a lot of time demonstrating what looked like yoga warrior moves to show me how a horse picks up its leads. He also talked about the bend in my body (not holding the inside leg on him when I'm asking him to pick up the lead), and moving my leg back (sliding it back, not just lifting my heel) to ask for the lead. And then we did this funky trot-walk-trot-walk-canter-trot-walk stuff where Mike changed it every few seconds, so that Willig had to LEAP off my aids and do the transition.
Mike was very satisfied with Willig's canter ability. He said it was basically 2nd level about to do flying changes. I gritted my teeth because it doesn't matter if we can do flying changes if we can't pick up the lead I'm asking for in a 1st level test. Or go past a spot where, horrors, someone raked and there are rake marks in the earth. He even spent extra time with me, and we still just flailed around, and then after he left, I started crying.
I don't know what's going on with me. I think I've hit a wall.

A more succinct way to state next year's goals

2011-01-02T18:31:00.000-08:00

I'm not going to get any better by whining about not being better, so I should probably just shut up and ride already.

Reflections on 2010; Goals for 2011

2011-01-01T19:10:00.000-08:00

I left my last dressage lesson and last jump lesson feeling down, instead of elated and excited, and I've been thinking about why for the last couple of days. That coincided perfectly with the normal tradition of reflecting back and looking forward for the New Year, so I thought I'd try to make some sense out of what my mood is about while setting some new goals - kind of a two birds with one stone sort of thing.
I think that I am still stymied by my expectations for him. I wanted a push-button horse. What I got was a horse who is teaching me how to ride, and it is much slower going than what I had in mind. I want instant, immediate gratification without having to work for it. I don't want to know how to ride - I want to get on a horse and have him perform flawlessly like a robot, predictable horse.
And yes, I realize that I don't actually want that. I'm proud of how far Willig and I have come together over the last year. I'm really, really grateful for how lucky and fortunate we are to have such an incredible barn and two trainers who work really well for us. (And who are patient with us.) Willig came at the right time for me to learn how to ride, before I got even older and more set in my ways. I just didn't realize that I didn't know how until he came along.

Looking Back at 2010:
In general, over the course of the year, Willig has gotten friendlier towards me. When he sees me coming to his paddock, he walks to meet me, and while I'm grooming him, he likes to groom me back. He also saved me from what would have been a humiliating deer-attack, despite his profound fear of deer. Then again, he also fell down while playing in a paddock when pretty much every one at the barn was looking.
I also have way more tools in my tool kit when he acts up, so I can feel it coming, and put a stop to it before he gets speed built up like a rocket. This is thanks to both Mike and Shannon, although mostly Shannon since he still pretty much refuses to act up in front of Mike (although other people have confirmed to Mike that indeed, he does act up when Mike is not there).
He did NOT get hives this fall (although he had them at the beginning of the year), and we got a "new" dressage saddle and a new Rambo blanket, and he's gained enough weight and muscle that this year he's going to have to ride with a pad with his jump saddle.
He went to quite a few unrecognized shows and derbies, and did pretty well at most of them. His lowest score was a 5th at a derby but that was where horses were eliminating right and left. He did jump a hopeful fence from a standstill at that show. He got high point or something at the one recognized dressage show we were at (Training level).
I have a lot of blog posts raving about awesome dressage and jumping lessons.
And, he got his portrait taken (and now on display at work and at home) by Mary Cornelius.

* Dressage *
At training level, he scored mostly from 61 - 66%.
I can sit a 1st level test at the trot.
We can also do all the 1st level movements.
We are starting to work on 2nd level movements.
That's pretty &*(*##&*&*(# spectacular, given that I have no idea what we're doing at 2nd level, and I haven't been able to sit the trot my entire life.
He's got awesome lateral movements.

* Jumping *
At the start of the year, he was still bucking and I was hardly ever riding him over fences.
He did so-so at the shows, at some kicking butt and at others, being spooky. While he was consistently in the ribbons, he wasn't consistent at the shows. Shannon has suggested this has to do with who is designing the courses and I should be more selective.
At Caber Pony Club x-country, we actually had fun.
Jumping without stirrups rapidly and dramatically improved my leg position. And I got WAY more comfortable in my jump position.
He ended the year jumping training level height and a scary fence without running out. And no bucking. And he carried me over it, because I was a useless sack of nerves.
J's work with him has really shown. He has built a LOT of confidence.

Goals for 2011:
In an ideal world, we'll sell the truck and trailer and get a "new" lightweight trailer.
But his saddle will probably have to wait until 2012 if the stuff we have on the agenda comes together (like Nepal for a month).
Next year I swear I will give him a better clip job. Poor guy.
And I hope the crap on his nose goes away.

* Dressage *
Keep polishing 1st level movements.
Keep polishing "basics" (heels down, hands still and steady, leaning back, my aids)
Work on 2nd level movements.
Show unrecognized and recognized 1st level.
Start making 1st level freestyle test.

* Jumping *
Keep working on "basics" (heels down, legs defensive in front (being left behind over fence), hands still, even, & steady, better use of half halt and dressage, cluck, use my legs, and use my whip to be the boss and tell him what to do (i.e. ride assertively towards the fence))
Continue to work on confidence - go over anything scary like a cone
Continue to work outdoors/away from security of indoor arena
Continue to work on trails & riding in pasture
Continue to haul to derbies (and maybe other places?) to make travel ho-hum
Work on height at home - be comfortable over 2'6" when competing hopeful; 2'9" when move up to beginner novice (this should be after no more silly spooking at shows - and consistently placing in top 3)
Ideally, ride beginner novice by end of season.
(Next year (2012) we'll add ditches and banks and maybe (!) recognized shows.)

So to repeat a quote from back in August:
"The measure of success is not whether you have a tough problem to deal with, but whether it is the same problem you had last year."
- John Foster Dulles