More humble pie

I'm pretty close to as humbled as you can get. Today was my first time riding in a clinic with Major Beale, and for my overview, I told him that as I've worked closely with Shannon on Charlie this year, as we progressed, I began to realize that I was fudging the basics. As one example, Charlie is usually bent to the right. Major Beale then proceeded to turn my whole world on its ear. First, he had me walk both directions. Then I rode a circle at the trot, each direction without my inside stirrup. Then he told me that my right leg is clamped on - without the stirrup, it doesn't move, but with both stirrups, it is so dominant that I post crooked - up and to the left. So that makes Charlie's left shoulder bulge out, which makes me clamp on with my right hand, which bends him to the right, which ends up in that "C" shape to the right. So he said, innocently enough, that we'd work on correcting that. Here's my confession. I wanted him to see me ride, identify a tiny fix, and then praise me for having a wonderful natural seat despite really only having a couple years of good training from Mike and Shannon. I didn't know I wanted this until I was pouring sweat at the end of the ride. So the primary exercise we did was standing up in the stirrups, at the trot for half the arena, then a shoulder-fore or haunches-out down the other side of the arena. Then we worked without stirrups completely on the canter, on a circle, and for this one, we worked on pulling my legs away from the saddle (hard to do, even without stirrups), and then tucking my tail-bone under but not arching my back. For both of these, we also worked on asking Charlie to keep his impulsion with only the whip - no leg - because the second I'd quit thinking about my leg, it would start clamping on him again. We also worked on the inside track - I think to keep me from using the outside rail as a crutch. Every once in a while, I would pull it all together, and there would be that moment of magic like I had in the lesson with Shannon a couple lessons ago - where I felt everything fall into place, and I was completely and utterly plugged in to Charlie and felt perfectly in place. Most of the time, I felt like my body had a mind of its own and was impossible for me to control. Major Beale will say to stretch my leg long, and I would try to stretch it long, but it would pretty much blow me off. We also had very humiliating moment (for me) where he asked me how to steer, and I guessed pretty much everything under the sun BUT the reins. I can't even bear to repeat everything I guessed other than the reins. It was a brilliant lesson, and he did a great job seeing all my foibles (the humble pie for me), and those moments felt incredible, but it's just that I thought I was an ok rider, and it turns out I know close to nothing. I WANT to know this stuff, I just wish I had learned it earlier. It's also just a bit out of my grasp. I feel it when it is right, I am just not sure how to control my body to make it right. Also, my right hip and my sacrum are SORE already!