3'8" vertical & oxer; left vs. right

We started warming up by trotting, then cantering, over a short pole on the ground.  The art to this was getting the angle of the turn correct, so that Duke could canter stride over the pole.  This was a simple exercise that was very hard to do and was an excellent demonstration of the need for precision in steering and the shape of the circle.  I told John it felt like Duke's head was all stuck out and he said yes, but why didn't I do something about it, instead of framing it like it was Duke's choice.  As soon as I asked, sweet Duke got round and on the bit, and it was an excellent reminder for me to be responsible for what he's doing, and to fix things (when I know how) instead of wait for him to do it himself.  It was also an excellent example of how sweet Duke is - even though he was trying his damndest to get over that pole - even though every freaking circle I put him in a different spot - he got round and obedient and just quietly went over the pole (when he could be quiet).
Then we cantered over a little vertical with a ground pole on the right lead.  Duke did a decent job landing on the right lead, but I did a TERRIBLE job making the turn off the rail and then the turn to the fence in the correct places.  This was two things - using the outside leg and the outside hand pressed against his neck.  I was afraid to half halt because I didn't want to slow him down, but he needed it to balance, and he also needs that firm outside aids because he likes to bulge out through his left shoulder (hence the drifting when we started jumping together last summer).  You would think that maybe by like, attempt #5 I would get it.  No.  I just got more flailing as we went and I tried harder and harder to get it correct.  John showed me where I'd make the flat part of the circle, and how it would influence the final approach.  That's the bad news.  The good news is that a) I felt how my left leg and hand needed to work, and b) sweet little Duke, bless his little heart, would just deal with it, regardless of how I got him there.  John said he's pretty even keel - whether he's jumping 3' or 3'8" (the height we maxed out at - which looked GIANT), which is a great trait to have.
From there, we did an exercise on the ground, with two ground poles, one at 12 and one at 6, and then I tried to ride an even circle and even strides, so that it was land - 1 - 2 ... - 8 on each side.  This was an even more devious - simple to say, but holy moly hard to do exercise.  John said that once I can do center to center, I can do inside to inside or outside to outside (so land - 1 ... -7; land - 1 ... -9), but to be very careful about the distance and not to get too worked up about it.  I think I will just start with one ground pole in the middle of the arena, although now that I type it, I think I need the second one to check my shape and the even strides.
From there we did a left lead canter over an oxer that had TWO ground poles in front of it (!).  The two ground poles ended up being not a big deal at all, but I had to work very hard to keep my eye up and on the wall - it really wanted to look down at the oxer.  John reminded me to keep my leg down and forward - I was letting it swing back, so I thought about that the last few fences, except for then I just felt all weird, like I had a belt around my waist pulling me backwards while the rest of me flung forwards.  So, like usual, I overdid it.
But, Duke was just as sweet and even as could be, although he does not like landing on the left lead.  Wait, I'm doing it.  Although I do not make him land on the correct lead.
John said to remember how things were just a few months ago, when I couldn't keep things together going over one little 2' fence out in the arena (we would land, tear off, and I would tilt all sideways and stand on one side of the saddle!), and now I am frustrated because I'm an inch or so off because I made a flat corner.  He said it's all relative, and it was a good reminder.
The interesting part about the oxer on the left lead was how much easier it is to make the shape of my circle and approach correct using my right leg and right hand.  So it isn't my eye - John said I'm seeing it, just not sticking Duke to it on the right lead (because of that left shoulder tendency to bulge/drift), and so that's good news too.  If I can do it with my right leg, eventually I'll be able to do it with my left leg too.
It was a great lesson, and I'm super excited to work on that ground pole exercise at home, so I sharpen up our precision without burning up Duke's legs.
I also got him - for my birthday - some new bell boots, some ice boots, and cooling liniment.  I upped his SmartPak too, to Ultra, and added some coat supplement to see if it helps his tail, so it will be good to see if these help, or at least don't hurt.

Some nice circles!

I had a long list of questions for John before we started, including short beds vs. long beds in trucks (the downside is if you turn too sharp, you'll break your back window; the upside is they're easier to drive around town), auditing Lucinda (she uses a microphone to the rider, so you have to loiter near her to hear), derbies (yes, I can start them at training level), California (he is going to Twin Rivers, but it probably isn't worth it to ride novice), my life, schedule, and stalls.  John said if he is losing weight, and Body Builder helped, go ahead and put him back on it.
From there, we went to work.  Although Duke was a little tense from the wind (and maybe not getting turned out this morning), he put himself to the task pretty well.  John added a bit from the last few lessons, having me work on making him more round, and then also having more impulsion.  I had a few insights, although I'm not sure how well I'll be able to capture them, but one (that John noted) was that it's easier to bend him now because I'm not also giving up the outside hand.  I noticed I had a bit more control using one hand but not the other, which suggests that most of my riding life, when I use the right hand I am also using the left hand (and ditto for my legs).
I was also, when trying too hard, putting my outside leg too far back, which pushes his haunches in.  If I thought about keeping the outside leg up closer to the girth, it made it easier for Duke to get his body aligned on the proper track.
We worked on bending, then keeping the bend but using the outside rein for a half halt to even up his shoulders.  We also worked on a leg yield out, but keeping that half halt rein to keep him from bulging out through the outside shoulder to move away from the leg yield.  John suggested I make the checklist of aids in my head, and then check them all, since that's how I think.  So if I put on the leg yield aid, and don't get Duke lined up on the track, next check whether I used the outside aid as a half halt at the same time, or if I only used the leg aid.
We got a few very nice 10 meter circles at the trot, and our transitions were not perfect, but were lots better than they were at home by myself.  John would have me give forward when I got everything lined up, and then Duke would carry himself.  It only lasted a few steps, but John said to just make sure that after those few steps, when I feel it change, to put the aids back on.
The art here seems to be the ability to use each aid independently - each hand and each leg doing a different thing, and changing, as needed, from step to step.  It is cool that I can see that - and do it (sort of) when John is telling me each one, because that isn't even something I could have been aware of a couple years ago, but man - that is a steep hill to climb.
At one point, on a 10 meter circle, Duke had his haunches in, and John said it was good I could feel it, but why was I waiting for him to tell me to fix it.  This one we tried first to fix it with the outside half halt, which Duke ignored, so then we did a counterbend to the outside, then bent him back in without giving up the connection on the outside.
We also did a few 10 meter canter circles, which were far from perfect, but pretty cool we could do 10 meter canter circles.
The other thing is not to let my hands drag down (and forward) when I'm trying to give an aid, but make sure to carry them.
It was a great lesson; Duke is a sweet little guy and I feel like he's coming along quite nicely.  I just wish I could retain it to describe it a bit better in between the lessons.

Jumping in front of an audience

John had a full house tonight, and so we ended up with an audience for my lesson.
John started us on the flat, working Duke in a 20 meter, then 10 meter circle.  I was dragging my hand down a bit, and I had to think a couple times to put my heels down and push my legs forward and down because they were creeping up.  We got a couple of very nice up transitions.
Then we started riding over a line of poles.  The first time through was good, second time was rough - I could feel that we weren't at the right distance a couple strides out, but I didn't do anything, and so Duke kind of flailed his own way through, after that, both he and I did a little better about getting on the right distance on the way in.
From there, John turned it into a ground pole - vertical - ground pole, going to the left (so landing on the left lead).  Except we never once landed on the left lead, which was ok the first couple of times, but then just got embarrassing.  I would look to the left, put my right leg on, put my right leg on further back, squeeze my left hand - nothing.  We just consistently landed on the right lead.  The good news is it only takes about 1/4 of the arena - oh, god, written down that doesn't look like good news - to trot and transition to the left lead.
Then we did the same vertical (well, he lowered it then raised it again) going to the right, and Duke had no problem whatsoever landing on the right lead.
From there we went into the grid, which was a ground pole, chute, cross rail, ground pole, vertical, oxer.  I think the oxer ended around 3'10" which felt huge to me today, so I had to work really hard on looking at it then past it and taking a deep breath on the way in.  I got nervous about everyone watching.
The first time in, I didn't put any extra leg on, and poor Duke sort of flopped through like a limp fish.  John said to help him, so the next time I did al little squeeze at the vertical, then a decent squeeze at the oxer - one more time through with leg aids, and then he caught on, and then I didn't have to do it anymore.
The art to this seems to be balancing him far enough out that I don't mess with him on the final approach.  While we were doing the vertical, John told me to relax my hands, and it made a huge difference.  So I'd steer from the outside leg to get the right line, then a couple strides out, relax both hands, and that seemed to help Duke make the jump smooth and consistent.
I still couldn't land on the &*#(&*(# left lead to save my life, but the right lead was no problem.
I felt like my position was a little better - John said to make sure I don't throw the reins forward when he tells me to give - but we still had a hard time making the turn on the far end after the oxer.  I felt like I was sitting up a little more, but we would still - despite having tons of space - careen around the corner, and I'd use the wall to make that turn.  John said to bend a little to the outside and to use the outside rein to turn him and half halt.  Eventually, he made me get on a 10 meter circle and bend him to the outside and then give the inside rein and steer only with the outside, so that I could feel that I could do it and Duke would respond.
This is obviously going to continue to need work (and I need to ask John what exercise on the flat would replicate it) for the more technical turns and distances in the shows, but I was also thinking how much improved Duke is from when he got here in June and we kind of just shot off on the far side of the fences and especially from that first show, where I pulled him around by his face the whole time.  I could sort of get it, a little bit, sometimes ...
This week was another shitty one at work, to the point where some part of each hour of the day I think surely there is something else I could do with my life that would be more rewarding and fulfilling, and so having a successful lesson restored a tiny bit of my waning self-confidence.  I might not ever be a great rider, but I keep learning from John, and the more effort I put in, the more I improve.  It's like the opposite of practicing law.

Novice geometry & my concentration

I decided to start working my way through the new dressage tests on days when we're not working on something else, so I started this week with the new Novice A.  It had a two loop serpentine from A to C and I wasn't sure what was intended by a "two loop serpentine".  Not surprisingly, I was overthinking it.  John said a dressage arena is 40 meters long, so it is 2 1/2 20 meter circles.  In other words, it is a counterclockwise circle starting at A with a change of direction at X and ending at C.  John said that the gotcha will be heading to C, not making the round circle, but riding straight into the corner.
From there, we went to work.  Duke felt light in the warm up, and yesterday, although our transitions have felt a little rough.  And miracle of miracles, John had us work on transitions.  He said that Duke can do it, and I shouldn't just accept the rough transition, but ease him into it - get the bend and then keep the bend all the way into the transition.  We did trot up to canter and then canter back down to trot, and, like riding each step of the circle, it just required me paying attention to each step.
Interestingly, Andrea and Allison were wrapping up, and were being hilarious, and John noticed that when I was paying attention to them (and talking back), Duke got more round and on the bit than when I was actively trying to make him round and on the bit.  Very interesting.
In addition to transitions, we continued to work on the shape of the circles.  John would have me make a 15 meter circle, and then he said to hold it on the 20 - there's something about making the circle smaller that makes me concentrate, but he said it's riding the same out on the regular 20 meter circle.
We ended because Duke was calm and was trying.  John said for now, we want him to be less anxious, and so his reward is to stop when he tries and gives, and that it's not a big deal.  He said when we go on to lateral work, the lessons will be longer because Duke will start to react, but the big lesson for him right now - which is obvious in how much more relaxed and balanced he is about the work - is that it is ok to do what I ask and not fight about it.
I also felt like he was just really balanced today - it is harder to sit up in the canter - John was right a few months ago, it really does kind of lurch me forwards - but I can do it so long as I concentrate.  But his trot, I felt like both my legs just wrapped down and around him and I was glued to the saddle.  I'm not sure if it was him or me or both of us, and maybe related to the extra time in the gym, but it felt like we were really connected.

Light in the reins (jump lesson)

Duke was moving great today, and we had a total angels singing moment.  John had us warm up working on 20 meter circles, and after he had me do a bit of flexion, he told me to give a little on the inside rein and then give a little on the outside rein at the same time.  And Duke went light in my hands and kept going.  It was AMAZING.  I have never felt that before.  John said later that while Charlie was good about making himself round, he didn't get light in the hands.
I was supposed to take that amazing, miraculous, feather-cloud feeling and keep it while we jumped.
So we started with pole, cross rail, pole, pole, but with a chute in between each.
John put the middle pole up to a vertical, and then the final pole to an oxer, which he gradually increased.  I thought we made our turns at the far end much better than last week, although they still did need some improvement.  John told me a couple times to put my leg down and to open my chest and sit tall, and he said that when Duke is very calm and quiet, I need to help him by putting on my leg.  So I'd squeeze at the cross-rail, squeeze at the vertical, and squeeze at the oxer, but look up and through (past) the oxer as I came in.
Then John had us jump the stand-alone vertical after the grid.  This was, after the assistance of the grid, a little harder to do.  I would get the line wrong, but then stick to it, and we came in really short a few times and then longer a couple times.  John said that I need to watch for Duke not paying attention - that if I pick a line and stick to it - Duke needs to commit to it as well.
Duke got pretty sweaty, but he was really nice to ride over the bigger oxer (maybe 3'10"?) and I felt like we did a little better on our leads too.
But that lightness in my hands?!  Damn ... that was awesome.

Dr. Salewski at Legacy

Duke saw Dr. Salewski at Legacy today.  He was stiff in the left sacroiliac (it was his right last time) with what I'll call the reflective stiffness on the right side of his neck.  Dr. S said this was good, that he didn't revert back to his prior pattern, and that it loosened up very quickly.  He really only had a few weeks of work after Dr. S last saw him, but he did have a lot of standing around.  Dr. S will be back in mid-Feb, and I hope to bring Duke up again, so it will be interesting to see how he does on a third visit after he's been in work the whole month.
He didn't need stall rest - Dr S suggested a trail ride today (I gave him an hour of standing around in his pasture) - and I'll do light work tomorrow.

Duke's race history

He had 11 starts (in 2014, as a 3 yo) and $1,647 in earnings.
I don't know why this took me so long, but this is the website for the summary:
http://www.equibase.com/profiles/Results.cfm?type=Horse&refno=9178567&registry=T

Final race:
Jockey:  Wilfredo Corujo
Trainer:  David W. Geist
Owner:  Witchway Stable
Breeder: Pagnoni & Giangiulio

He was three when he raced.
Notes: 
12/20/14 (fast track) (came in 6/11):  pressed the pace from the three path through the turn, then faded in the drive - no $
12/5/14 (sloppy track) (came in 5/7):  was close up early, raced along the inside on the turn then faded late - won $315
11/22/14 (fast track) (came in 5/11):  rallied late inside - won $315
11/5/14 (fast track) (came in 5/7):  was void of early speed, raced along the four path on the turn and failed to menace - $390
10/18/14 (fast track) (came in 8/11, but 9-11 lost jockey, fell, and broke down): was slow early, steadied and altered course to avoid the fallen horse on the turn and was eased up
10/2/14 (firm track) (came in 9/9):  was outrun
9/13/14 (firm track) (came in 5/6):  was void of early speed, raced along the two path on the turn then angled outward but was not a factor - won $627
9/5/14 (fast track) (came in 6/6):  showed little
8/21/14 (fast track) (came in 6/7):  bobbled at the break, then was outrun
7/11/14 (fast track) (came in 7/9):  was outrun inside
6/26/14 (fast track) (came in 6/6):  trailed after a slow break

Track	Date	Race	Race Type	Breed	Finish	Chart	Video
Penn National	12/20/2014	9	Maiden Claiming	TB	6
Penn National	12/5/2014	9	Maiden Claiming	TB	5
Penn National	11/22/2014	9	Maiden Claiming	TB	5
Penn National	11/5/2014	9	Maiden Claiming	TB	5
Penn National	10/18/2014	9	Maiden Claiming	TB	8
Penn National	10/2/2014	1	Maiden Claiming	TB	9
Penn National	9/13/2014	1	Maiden Claiming	TB	5
Penn National	9/5/2014	2	Maiden Claiming	TB	6
Penn National	8/21/2014	9	Maiden Claiming	TB	6
Penn National	7/11/2014	9	Maiden Claiming	TB	7
Penn National	6/26/2014	7	Maiden Claiming	TB	6

Chock full of lessons lesson

John gave me one of those lessons where my brain got very, very full.  I'm not sure I'm going to do it justice remembering it all.
First, we talked about the aids for the free walk, following up on our lesson from a few months ago when I realized I had no idea what the aids were.
To ask for the free walk, let the reins slip as I move my hands out.  It is like slip - in/out - slip - in/out (except concurrently).  This way, Duke takes the reins and pulls them down, and I'm not throwing them away and just hoping he drops his head.
To go back to medium walk (oh yeah, start in medium walk before asking for free walk), first bring in the inside rein, then use inside leg to keep him bent, and then bring in outside rein and use outside rein for a half halt (if needed).
This was such an elegant, simple explanation that I should be able to practice it on my own, and I'm sort of horrified for the years I just threw the reins down and then grabbed them back up.
The medium walk should come as you're touching the letter and the rail again, so that if he tries to jig, I can bend him around that inside leg right there on the rail.

From there we did work on the 20 meter and 10 meter circle on bending using my leg aids.  This felt like John got to go a little step further, instead of just repeating himself.  We also did a couple different exercises, where we'd halt, I'd ask him to bend to the inside, and then we'd walk forward.  A few times John had a number of steps (three walk steps, for example) and then trot.  The bending to the inside was just because Duke was stuck in his jaw, and John wanted him to loosen it up.  The key is as soon as he gives with it, to quit jigging around in his face.
John showed me with the reins, how to ask him to the bend to the inside, and then keep the outside firm and then half halt.
Another eureka was not letting my hand drag down and forward, but holding the reins and giving with my elbow (as needed).

John had us on a 20 meter circle, then we'd do 10 meter circles and work on using those leg aids (and a little bit of rein) to make the circle round, then keep that bend and move back out onto the 20 meter circle.  John had a bit more asking him to go forward, but not letting him get long and flat on the forehand.  I felt like I was starting to get the leg aids, steering him around (the flow of water from Sally Swift in Centered Riding?) with my legs, instead of my hands, and then using my hands to get the bend in his neck or in his jaw, but not to steer him (as much) around the circle.
What I'm not as good at is connecting the inside leg to the outside hand - I do the half halt with the rein, but forget the inside leg.
It's very nuanced, and for me - riding every step.  As soon as I let my mind wander (look who drove up, for example), the circle would lose its shape.  Which is good, because that means my legs are working to keep the shape at other times.
A few times, John had me put my inside leg forward, or my outside leg back, and more rarely, to push Duke's haunches in towards John.  This one I can't feel as well, so am not ready to work on at home alone (I don't think).
We would also get a nice trot on the 10 meter circle, then pick up the canter as we rounded the last part of the circle and go out to the 20 meter circle.

It was beautiful weather, like a spring day, which made the contrast with last year when Charlie died very memorable.  Duke rode home without a blanket and got to walk around in his pasture to stretch out without one.  Charlie was in his snow suit last year on this weekend.

I'm frustrated I can't remember more of the lesson but hopefully as I ride this week, I'll feel it and be able to work on it.  I feel like Duke is coming along really well.  Our trot/canter transitions are still a little rough, but he is so much more balanced than when he got here in June, and I feel like we're really communicating better.
Except.  I wanted to go walk him in the sun to cool off, but he got a little anxious about the gate.  Then my idiot brain realized he probably had to leave the chutes when he raced.  (I need to pull his race records.)  So we worked on standing next to it, and swinging it open and shut.  The two times I got impatient and tried to go through it, he wasn't ready.  But I did the same as with the anxious walk/halt, and just stood there and patted him and stayed calm, and eventually he chewed and looked around, and then got less anxious when he realized I wasn't going to ask for anything too crazy.  I guess we just got lucky the one time I rode him through the gate, and we'll have to work on this more at home.

[Edit:  Sure as shit, when I rode Duke tonight I remembered a few more things from the lesson.  One was when Duke "roots" (which is really just like a little tendril, not a real rooting), put both legs on.  If he's stuck in the jaw, counterbend him and then bend him back (that's what we were doing when John took the reins and showed me).  There was more, but now that I'm home and it's been a few hours, I can't remember the other two things.]

Wonderful jump lesson & Duke's personality

Duke started out really obedient in the warm up, and so John didn't have to spend as much time on the individual aids.  We worked 10 meter and 20 meter circles at trot and canter both directions, with Duke needing a bit more bend, haunches in, and a bit more forward.  He felt soft and pliable, and very responsive.  I wonder if it has something to do with him staying in today instead of going out?
Then we jumped a cross rail, which John turned into a small vertical after a few times.  John's main instruction here was to keep the rhythm, not to let Duke speed up the last couple steps.  Our first two times through, we veered to the right (inside) pretty hard when we landed, but once I realized it was happening, I focused on a particular spot on the wall and that helped us stay (more) on course on a straight line.
Miraculously, we managed to get our leads both directions!
From there we started a grid that John had set up.  It was trot in, over a ground pole, cross rail, over a ground rail with a chute on the far side (ground pole chute), vertical, to what became an oxer.  John built it up as we went through it, and I took turns landing each direction (right-left-right-left).  It was MUCH harder to make the turn to the right afterwards than to the left.
Duke stayed a steady eddy as John built it up; I never really felt him bat an eye, and even when John ended it with a very respectable oxer, Duke just cruised through it.  Maybe about half way through John leaned a pole on the left side of the oxer, which I think helped keep Duke from drifting left.
For this, my instructions were to sit up, chest forward, heels down, look ahead through my turn, wait for it, and then give a bit of a squeeze just before the vertical and just before the oxer.  Then, when we landed, sit up, stay up, and transition him back down to the trot.
John said we need to work on landing, but he also wanted to check Duke's disposition when he raised the fence height, since Duke hasn't done a lot of work over big fences.  He was (pleasantly) surprised (if I dare say so) that Duke didn't use the height as an excuse to rush.
To work on landing, I tried to think sit up as we went over the oxer, and then not bend over when we made the turn.  Then we'd circle (sometimes getting him on the correct lead) and get him bent again before transitioning back down to trot.  It does need some work, and it will be hard to string fences together at the show without it, but good lord, Duke is SO much better than when he got here in June and we tore around with me ripping on his face the whole time!  I was so pleased with how well he did today, especially because I was beginning to feel like we were at one of those plateaus where John is just repeating himself and repeating himself and I go home and try to work on it but am just not getting it.  This felt like the last few lessons sunk in and we were able to show that we made some progress in between.
John also said - now that we've both been able to watch Duke and John's been able to ride him a few times - that Duke is going to be the sort of horse that I have to be patient and calm with.  I'm not going to be able to strong arm him into doing something he doesn't want to do, but if I ask him just a little, just a little more, wait a bit, ask just a little more, Duke will be doing it without even really realizing it.  John said he's a nice mover, but he's tense, and the one thing we can't do is make a horse relax.  I think he's still young, and I'm sure it's hard to be ridden by me and understand what I want, so I bet after we are a team for a few years, we'll be much better together.
The lesson made what was turning into a total wreck of a week turn around.  As much as I miss Charlie, and I miss him every damn day, I feel really lucky to have found Duke.  He's a good little guy.

Circle aids and truck advice

I was toying this week with whether I should start looking for Monolith's replacement.  John had some great advice:

I should first take it to a dealer and see how much it is worth as a trade-in.  He said it is a power stroke and that adds to its value.

Fords are pretty reliable and rarely need repairs, but when they do, they tend to be very expensive.

Dodge have the best engines.

Chevy have the most comfortable interiors.

If I can drive one home, Texas, Wisconsin, and Florida have the best used ones.

I should go test drive each kind and see which is most comfortable.  He has a Dodge because he needs the strong engine, but based on his comments, I leaned towards a Chevy.  He said the seat adjustment in the Chevy helps ease the tension on your hips when you're driving.

He also said that yes, a F350 (or equivalent) in case I want to get a trailer with living quarters, that a 350 would be able to pull that no problem.

I forgot to ask him about short beds vs. long beds.

I looked online this week at Fords in Washington, and there were several F350s for sale, generally around 2010-2011.  They had huge variations in the mileage and decent variations in price too.  So I guess I'll go sit in a few and test drive them, and then start shopping.  He said he had a very specific list of requirements, and it took four months for him to find the right truck.

For my lesson, we worked on using the leg aids to get the proper circle shape.  I felt like I got this a little bit better than I have been in prior lessons.

When approaching the wall, I use my inside leg to push him round and into the curve along the wall, but as we leave the wall and go into the open space of the arena, I use my outside leg to keep his shoulder on the circle track and not drift out into a hexagon shape.  Then, as we start to enter the turn across from the wall (in the center of the arena), I use my inside leg again to keep him round on the track.  From there, it's back to outside leg to bend us back to the wall, and then inside leg again, back at the start.

We did it several times - it was "easier" to do on a 10 meter circle than a 20 because I had to go in-out-in-out in quick succession, but once I could feel his shoulders staying on the track, when we went out to the 20 meter circle I could repeat it (for a little while, but then he would drift and I wouldn't feel it as much).

John said that Duke seemed pretty good today and I said yes, but yesterday he thought about being naughty at the halt (there was a succession of odd noises and he just got more agitated as the ride went on) and John said he might have to wear a bonnet at shows and my halts might just have to be super fast.  Duke does a lot better at John's though, where he can see what the cause of the noises are, so I think at most shows, he'll probably be more like he is at John's than he is at home.  It is kind of frustrating though, because I don't have the same ride at home to practice as I do at John's.  I spend more time trying to keep him calm (and yesterday, on the rail, instead of shying at the stuff lined up next to the wall).  It's probably good practice for if I'm ever in that situation at a show, but it will be nice when the days are longer and I can ride outside again and focus more on what I'm working on in my lessons.

Group jump lesson with Reese and Elena

Tonight I got to ride with Reese and Elena, which was great because it's my first group lesson in a very long while.  It was also good because I checked work email at the trailer before I tacked up, hoping I'd have some more information for John on when I would need help with Duke due to work.  There were several emails and I got so pissed off I was about to cry, and had to start the lesson breathing deep and trying to set it aside and focus on the lesson.  And it worked - probably helped being in the group - because I had to concentrate on John and where they were in the arena and trying to listen and watch what he was telling them too.
We did some flat warm up with John giving us corrections (mine was using outside rein and asking Duke to go forward, just for a few steps, so that when I use outside rein it settles him back into it - instead of slowing him down), and then we worked on the quarter line and leg yielding over to the wall, first at trot, then at canter.  Reese and Elena had to go straight before leg yielding, but Duke and I got to use the bend to help us get over to the wall.  Duke was pretty surprised by the first canter leg yield, but then John had me go a little closer to the wall instead of on the quarter line, and Duke handled it after that.
Duke was a little champ.  We did the same exercise (sort of) as last time, where we started with the 7 poles on the ground.  Maybe because Duke had seen it before, he went through them fine.  Then John made a little vertical in the middle, but this lesson, for whatever reason, I could not get the first ground pole at the correct distance.  It wasn't hard when they were all poles, just once the first vertical went up.  John said that we have to look through it and not try to get the distance to that first pole, but I would feel that it was short or long and just want to correct that distance instead of going in goofy, but it just made it worse.  Little Duker Trooper just tried to keep his shit together though, and go through it.
Then John made the far vertical, and then eventually the first vertical, and then he made the center vertical a little higher.  Duke was just a sweet little reliable boy, and cruised through.  Not exactly the same each time, but pretty damn easy to ride him through.  That let me focus on trying to get the half halt before we went in, and then keeping my legs down and chest open on the way through, although I don't know how well I did at either of those because every time I ended up just being surprised that we made it through again.
We even landed on the correct lead a couple of times, although that appeared to be dumb luck on my part or cunning on Duke's part.
Reese's horse got a little excited, and John had her go through, halt, turn around, and go back through.  He made the fences a little easier (one was just one side in the vertical, for example) and then had her trot or walk in.  Elena's horse got to do a fourth vertical, so there were three in a row that made bounces instead of one strides (I think), but we didn't get to ride through that.
The lesson made my whole day.  All the work bullshit melted away, and I was just grateful to have a life where I could be at Caber riding.  Ashley said that Duke was a cute jumper, tucking his little legs up to make sure they got over the fence.  It was easy to stay balanced on him and I could feel him fold me when we did the higher fence, which was interesting.  I did a bit of an odd crest release, more out of my shoulders than my hands, and the whole thing went better if I balanced him to the fence with my abs instead of my hands if he looked at the line and thought about speeding up.
John also had us circle a couple of times, to rebalance him using the outside rein, when he got just al little rushed, and that helped a whole lot.  But mostly, it seemed like it was sweet Duke, wanting to go through and focusing on his job.  He's a good boy and I feel lucky I found him.  I think next week is going to be hard because it is the one year anniversary of Charlie's death, and I have been getting all jumpy and anxious like the end of the world is coming, and I am guessing that is it.