Pony Club & Working Harder

Two lessons today - the first with Asia for Pony Club.  She suggested that I do more half halts.  She said Charlie has plenty of movement, but he is letting his legs go out behind him instead of coming up under him.  To do a trot to halt transition, begin thinking about it for five strides (sit up, shoulder blades together) and then stop the movement on the 5th stride.  I got several perfect halts, but then ended on a few pukey ones.  I have to think about sitting up and pinching my shoulder blades together.  Then at the canter, I bend at the waist, so I need to try to keep my waist as one solid element.  Over fences, she said it is much harder to ride an 18" fence (in theory, than a 4' fence), and to ride in and half halt multiple times on the way in.  A half halt from a two point is a very, very weird feeling.  It is essentially just tightening your core (like a corset was around it) which sounds simple but seems to throw me off balance when I'm in a two point.  I like to curve and tuck my pelvis under instead, which is the wrong thing to do.  It was a really great lesson, and I really enjoyed working with her.

Then Charlie got in the trailer and we drove to Major Beale, where the short take away is we aren't working anywhere near hard enough - either one of us.  It was pretty discouraging.  It feels like we've made so much progress in so many places, but I cannot seem to "get" how to make Charlie engage behind and have impulsion and round over his topline.  I can feel it when it's there - it feels like his shoulders are lifted and I'm sitting on a pillow, like I can do anything with him at any second; but I can't make it be there on my own.
He got a lunge whip, and stood in the center and essentially lunged Charlie with the whip to make him forward while I rode him.  Charlie needs to march at the walk.  I don't need to use my legs 100 times, but should do a whack-whack-whack or a SMACK with the whip (not a hit every step).  He needs to be connected and poised to do anything - halt, trot, or canter.  If he isn't, he isn't forward enough.
Then at the trot, we worked on circles - first 20 meter at the trot, then 12 meter at the trot (10 is too small).  There, the big issue is bending him to the inside, but not letting him bulge through the outside.  It is giving and releasing with both hands, but each reacting to Charlie, so maybe both together or maybe not.
Same as John - Major Beale had us bend to the outside, then Charlie's shoulder would come up under him, and then bend back to the inside.
Then we worked on a smaller circle, and then trot to halt transitions.  For these, he has to be round and working and then I use my leg to push him forward, then stop moving my hips for the halt.  If he isn't round, he just pukes into it.  Major Beale's preferred way to get him round was to work on a circle bent to the inside, then push his haunches to the outside, then go bigger, then halt.  It was much easier to do to the right; I could feel it, but could hardly feel it to the left.
At the canter, it was some forward back and not as much bend, and NOT the up and down carousel horse (I don't know why not).  
Charlie was his usual sweet self, working his heart out even though he's lazy (I don't get it) and had already been ridden once and late last night.  Major Beale said I have got to toughen up and expect more out of him.  He told me that he has to spend 15 minutes doing the trot circles and bending each direction for his wife's 3rd level horse, and about some guy who couldn't go cross country but Major Beale always won on his horse.  I think the point is that it's mental, but I know that, and I need to know how to get over myself.  I'm clearly the hold up and not getting it, but I'm so not getting it I'm not sure why not. 
It was a great lesson, but frustrating.  I am ready to be done with this phase and working on the next thing.  I feel like I'm trapped in beginner-land and will be stuck here forever.
MB said we should NOT be sitting because Charlie isn't coming over his topline so his back isn't round and lifted.