Ba-da-bing!! Your saddle fit really does make a difference (duh).

On the 19th I had one of my (best efforts) twice-a-month lessons with Mike. I wanted to cancel, because from the last lesson to this one, I only got to ride about 5 times (about half what I wanted). All I can say is thank goodness I didn't.
It was the best lesson and quite likely, the best ride of my life.
Five key points:
1. Straighten my leg now, not push my lower leg back. I have to think about making my knee and thigh straight, but it is pretty amazing how straight and how far back they go. It is still taking some getting used to with my seat though, when they hang directly under me. But from the beginning (knee bent up in front of the saddle flap) to now - wow.
2. Rein pressure is "cradling a baby". It is both heavier than I am capable of remembering in between lessons, but if this makes any sense at all, with a soft hand. I pull back (thinking the classic elbows to hips) and when he gives with his head (which I can feel! yay!) I praise him.
3. Keep improving my position from my last lesson: butt wipes the saddle in the canter, and the slightly different but similar for the sitting trot. I also need to lean back a little more. Work on sitting the trot with 1/2 the finger strength (which is, entirely, Dumbo's feather).
4. Ride a stretchy circle - play with my reins as I let them out so the contact stays there.
**5.** (What made this the best ride of my life.) Mike had his saddle out (a custom-made Ryder (?) for his super nice horse, Pablo) for the lesson before mine, and we had been doing quite well and I had finally proven that I am capable of actually practicing what he is telling me in between lessons (like keeping my &*#&* heel down), and so he said that I was doing well, let's see if the saddle was holding Willig back any (he said, in the very first lesson, that it didn't fit him properly). I'm not sure it was holding Willig back, but let's just say it was - fireworks - stars in my eyes - a 100x improvement - and oh, uh, yeah - the best ride of my life. I just SAT in Mike's saddle and was like "oh". I have never - in my entire life - sat in a saddle that fit properly before. The light bulb went off. The saddle was comfortable. It helped me. I didn't have to fight it to ride.
As a result, we could do anything. I could sit the trot. I could lengthen and shorten his stride with just my seat. I could bend him. I could get him up on the bit. I didn't have to fight my legs or my heels or my hips. It was completely eye-opening.
And of course, now I have to come up with the money (we are definitely going to have to do used) and find the right saddle for Willig, because I don't even want to ride again in my sucky non-fitting saddle and lose the feeling of riding in Mike's. I could have ridden in it all day. I don't even know why I'd jump - it was so amazing to just ride in it. I wish I had one for work, to sit at my desk.
Oh yeah, and Willig? Once I quit flapping around up there, he just responded beautifully. Like a Ferrari.
Why in the world would I have been making something I'm not particularly gifted at, on a horse who is relatively sensitive, doing things slightly above my level, mostly by myself, 500 times harder by poorly fitting tack?
So Step 1 - new dressage saddle.
Step 2 is tied between the new (light weight) trailer or a new jump saddle - because if it even makes 1/2 the difference, it will be totally worth it to feel solid over the fences.
Mike has my undying devotion now. He has been right on about everything (like to just wait to jump until we reached a certain point in dressage, and lo and behold, that worked too once I quit jumping for a couple months and focused like he suggested), and has, in 6 months, made me a better rider than all my experience in my life so far.