A jump lesson that resulted in one step away from my huff

Today Shannon worked us hard, but effectively got me one step out of my bad mood that I've been stewing in for the past couple weeks.
Willig started out lazy on the lunge line and in our warm up (**and he has, on the left side of his neck, a whole nest of baby hives percolating**), but then, just after Shannon set up a new fence and before we could get going, he spooked at a flock of European starlings out the "scary" end, and then pretty much stayed in a mood the rest of the lesson. Unfortunately, that was really only about 20 minutes in, so I had 40 minutes of his mood.
The good news is that Shannon warned me at the beginning of the lesson to ride tough (mentally) and so it gave her the opportunity to teach me how to ride tough in a good lesson setting - not too crazy, but not Sweety McPacker either.
So we did a little cross rail with ground poles and a little vertical with ground poles, the latter with, when going clockwise, a hard right turn around the other fence, which scared me about making the turn but turned out to be doable. He tried to dart out to the right the first couple times over this, and miracle of miracles, I rode him to it, and used my wimpy right leg to keep him going "straight" over the fence instead of around it. Yay wimpy little right leg!
Then, as Shannon rearranged the fences into a little (2'3") oxer and a little bit bigger vertical than the first one, Willig decided he'd had enough of me not knowing how to stop him if he bolted, and gave us numerous opportunities for me to catch on. Mostly, these were him trying to bolt left (towards the barn; away from the scary end) so I had to pull HARD-right-fast. After a few times (thanks, Willig!*), I started to catch on, although I also just liked to steer him into the wall (not an option on cross country, I know).
(* = sarcasm)
So then we spent some time on a circle, then our first fence, then a circle with the new vertical (now smaller again), then other direction. This took a while.
Then he started acclerating toward the fence, and kind of rushing on the other side. So we worked on applying the brakes on the far side. Straight line to halt. This needed, sometimes, me leaning way back, and hands in the air pulling on his face, but after a few times of "oh, I'm really going to have to stop when Martha tells me to", he quit needing so much work.
This doesn't sound like much, but I was turning bright red and huffing and puffing because his head was like 2000 pounds of force, and so then Shannon had us work on control - squeeze, release, squeeze, release, and when she said halt, trot, back, or whatever, could I do it when she said to do it? Again, this one improved as we went along and Willig began to take me a bit more seriously, and (in Cartman's voice from South Park), "respect my author-a-tee".
Oh yeah, and somewhere in here Shannon turned on some vigorous music.
So then at the very end of the lesson we ended up with the circle we tried to start half way through the lesson - the vertical, past the scary end, over the oxer. Shannon wanted twice nice in a row, which we couldn't do the first couple times (rushing, mostly), so we had to do it a few times before we got something decent.
So the big change is to come into the fence, even from far out, with rhythm, and then keep it after the fence. It helped me a lot when Shannon said out loud 1-2-1-2 because I'd squeeze on 1 and release on 2 and it kept from me from ssqquuueeezzinggg the whole way to the fence.
Although not a fun lesson, it was a good confidence building and tool kit building lesson. Shannon's goal is to get me confident that I can jump him, and then hopefully that will be reflected in him building confidence that he can do whatever I am pointing him at - an upward spiral instead of the downward spiral we tend to fall into on our own. My goal is to be as comfortable as she and Mike are with shenanigans, and to ... get used to the idea that he's a horse and not a robot and isn't going to do exactly what I want him to do 100% of the time and is going to ... (news flash) act like a horse. Kind of a dumb ass horse, but that is another notch in the "lessons learned" belt for when I look for the next one. I'm fond of Willig, but he's teaching me really different stuff (good stuff, that I wish I learned a long time ago) than what I planned to learn from him, and I need to just get over that and accept where he's at and where I'm at and where we can go right now with that. I also need to remind myself, as I tend to be a black & white thinker, that when I'm feeling down, we're not going to be down the entire rest of my life, and when I'm on top of the world, enjoy it, because it isn't going to last either. Ahhh, meditation lessons creeping back in to my life to force me to learn them one way or the other.